dfourer Posted July 17, 2008 Share Posted July 17, 2008 I'm officially on vacation! Tuesday I rode my bicycle early in the morning 10 miles to get my 8:00am CT scan. I could tell that the effects of Avasting (half dose) and Alimta (80% dose) had finally worn off, after 28 days. I've been on this regimen for 7 1/2 months and I've been fighting the fatigue and muscle soreness most of the time. But Tuesday morning I was riding along on my bicycle feeling like my old self again. This morning I also took the bicycle. Two things were on my mind. The test results, of course. Also, could I, or should I, endure another dose of chemo? I made even better time riding to the doctor in downtown Chicago. Again it's early in the morning. I grab breakfast before my appointment. The doctor is smiling and seems happy to see me, but the discussion is frustrating as usual. My CT scan shows stable disease. That's a big deal, but my mind is already on the treatment decision. She thinks that spreading out my doses to lessen the side effects will give me a sub-therapeutic dose. But taking a vacation and "missing a dose" is OK. Also I should try some "energy pills" called Provigil (Modafinil), which I'm skeptical about. I agree to take today's treatment and then have a "vacation" next time. I have two conflicting interests. I think recovering from the medicine and building up my health is valuable, but I also worry about keeping the cancer under control. I'm thinking this over in the waiting room and I have second thoughts. I've been taking these drugs for over 7 months and I know their effects on my body pretty well. Then it occurs to me, I should take the "vacation" now. I go talk this over with a nurse, who I know pretty well now. It's much easier to explain what I'm really feeling and thinking to the nurse. She goes to clear it with the doctor. As always, relations with the nurses are relaxed and helpful. There's no stress and I often make lots of jokes. This time I'm feeling emotional, which is unusual for me. Around the nurses it's a safe place to get emotional. So I leave and get on my bicycle for the 60 minute ride home. I've had the needed 28 days to recover, so I'm really on vacation. Feeling well is the best vacation, but I might actually go somewhere too. I'd love to go hiking in some mountains somewhere. We'll see. David Fourer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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