Un-Cranky& my CT Results.

[Connie B]

Hey Friends!

Wow, what a bunch of awesome loving caring supportive friends I have here at LCSC.

I LOVE YOU ALL! BUCKY, thank you my DEAR FRIEND for calling me and for cheering me up. That was AWESOME!

Thank you ALL for your kind words and your love and support. It honestly did me a lot of good to vent it out and leave it behind.

Most of the time we all know the logical way to handle things, and we know all the right ways to deal with the ups and downs, We honestly know all the right answers, but sometimes those ways just don't work when your heart is bigger then your brain or when we just don't want them too. I told my Doctor's nurse yesterday that I know all the right ways to handle things but then my brain committee gets to working and all hell breaks loose and I can't sleep, I can't think straight, I can't eat, I cope an I don't care attitude, etc., etc. She said she totally understood what I was I saying. (thank God)! And then I must not be saying things correctly or politically correct because people misunderstand what I mean to say or what I THOUGHT I said. I don't know, maybe it is me! It very well could be. So, I have to really start thinking and being very careful as to what I say and how I say is. Sometimes I think just being alone with our thoughts is needed and I've kind of done that the last few days. I was on a POOR ME kick for a couple of days, but I ditched that and things are better.

Anyway, It's just been crazy stuff going on,(and a LOT OF IT) and I always try to be there for others but sometimes (not often) I need someone to be here for me. I don't always need answers, but I do need to vent now and then and by golly it did help to vent here. SO THANK YOU ALL again for letting me get it out! I know how to put things in prospective most of the time, but sometimes I'm just not ready to do it at that time. Does anything I am saying make sense?

Well, I'm not cranky anymore, my cold is NOT better, I am on meds for it. My cold settled in my chest and my Pulm Doc today told me NO MORE of that. From now on, when I feel a cold coming on, he want's to start me on antibiotics. He and I both know after my last heart surgery my lung is not as strong as it use to be, so he is concerned about me getting pneumonia. All these years we never really worried but about that, but now it's a number one issue. BUMMER! They really beat my lung up on that last surgery I had. So, now I have to be extra careful he said when it comes to colds.

Also, my Ct scan showed my nodules (one of them) has grown from 7mm to 1.6x 1.2cm. Going from a mm to a cm is concerning. So, my Pulm doc said he was very concerned with that growth. I have 3 nodules, and 2 of them appear stable since the previous exam the end of April, but the one decided to go haywire on me.

He stated I could NOT have a biopsy because of the fact that I only have ONE LUNG. It would be to risky to do one for fear it could collapse my lung. But he did talk about gamma knife (IF) this turns out to possibly be cancer again. I will go back in 5-6 months for a CT scan again and we'll see what it shows.

NOW, I also made mention to him that this might be enlarged due to infection from my cold as well Right I said???? And he did agree that it COULD be that also. So, we are going to try and think positive. So, that's, that!

As for my Aunt, what a ride that has been!!!!!!!!!!!!! She is meeting with a surgeon as I type this. Her PET scan showed 2 masses in her left lung. One on the top of the lung and the other in the middle. Her biopsy showed she has NSCLC and that was from the upper mass in the left lung. They are not clear as to if the mass in the middle of her lung is cancer or not. This whole ordeal has been so half-assed I am just frustrated. So, today my Aunt, Uncle and my cousin are at the surgeon's office and my cousin will get things in order here and we'll know more after today. My Aunt and Uncle don't hear things the way they should and they relay them even worse then the way they hear them so this has been craziness to say the least. However, my Uncle is 85 and my Aunt is 73 and I know she is in complete denial, not to mention really really really really pissed!!! So, it's been crazy! And I know there are things I don't have control over, but things just bug me sometimes. Logically I know I don't have control over a lot of things, but they still bug me now and then. Sometimes I just want to scream and by golly I just might do that too!

Well, I guess I have babbled long enough. My Love and Support goes out to you ALL!

[Donna G]

O Connie! Big HUG

(just don't give me that cold back)

Prayers going up for a better tomorrow.

Donna G

[MsC1210]

(((((Connie)))))

Hugs, prayers and love!!

Chris

[SandraL]

Hi Connie. I sure do hope that pesky enlarged nodule was due to your cold as well. I will send positive thoughts your way.

I can understand your frustration with your aunt given all your knowledge in the area. I am sure they will get it worked out and a plan in place. Lots of positive thoughts for your aunt as well.

Finally, thank you for your ongoing support to me. It means so much.

Please take good care

Sandra

[Kasey]

Wow, Connie. I'd say you have way much going on. Sorry about that. You know I get worked up over nodules. But THIS time I'm going to say that you know most times they turn out to be nothing of concern. Let's sure hope so in this case. I'm also hoping that things turn around with all you've got happening. You know I'm always pulling for you. Nodule scmodule!!!!!!!

Hugs to you,

kasey

[Patti B]

((((((((((((((Connie)))))))))))))))

Sorry about the nodules but I am going for the enlargement due to your cold. We'll just keep hoping and praying for that one!! And so sorry about your aunt - got to be tough when they get older.

As far as needing to vent - you know we all are here behind you, girlfriend. And you have my number, call me anytime you need to scream or holler!!!

Get rid of that cold real soon please - don't make me have to come up there with some chicken soup!!

Hugs - Patti B.

[Alisa]

Wow, Connie! I was away from the boards for a couple of weeks and had no idea that you of all people, who always bring the rest of us on the board up, was so down.

Ok, I'm not so flowery and emotional with words, cause if I open up, the flood gates will come and I can't deal with that. So, I'll only say this - you are blessed and you mean so much to all of us!!!!

Love,

Alisa