Ann Posted December 12, 2003 Share Posted December 12, 2003 Just a brief note to thank everyone for all your recent words of love and support! The days are long right now but the nights are even longer...and dark!!! I still lose my breath when I think of Monday (1st anniversary of Dennis's death) and how I will get through it. I'm reliving everything now, as if it happened yesterday rather than one year ago. Everyone is in my thoughts and prayers. What would we ever do without each other???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 Ann, it is very understandable that you are having a hard time right now, with Dennis' death anniversary just a few days away. And before the holidays. I wish for you peace and new life. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shirleyb Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 Ann, If I were there I would give you a hug and cry with you. I do understand how hard it is this time of year. I am also thinking of Mrs. Mike, and Shelley, and Christy, and Katieb, and Laurie, who is so new to this, and Jim W, and all the rest whose names escape me right now. You are not alone but yet it sure feels that way at times. With out all of those here, I do not know how I can go on but by the grace of God. Much love. Shirley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rick Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 It will definitely be hard on Monday and this will always be a day you will have to deal with. If possible, spend it with friends or family. We have several of those days in our family and that is how we manage.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeanCarl Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 Ann, Anniversaries can be so rough. The first year after my Mom's passing (from Lung Cancer, no less) was very hard. The second year was a bit easier and by the third year (it's been 5 years now) I made a concious choice to NOT grieve on that day, but to make it a celebration of her life instead. It may take a while but my hope for you is that you'll be able to do that also. I think you probably know you will survive this (though I ALSO know there are times when it feels like you won't). Stay close to friends and family. Live each day as best you can. The pain of loss, like any other wound, DOES heal. Dean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathy Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 Dear Ann, I wish I could help you. I understand what you mean by reliving everything. Having the holidays to deal with I am sure makes matters even worse for you. I wll be thinking about you and saying an extra prayer for strength and peace to get you through the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norme Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 I second what Dean said. I will be thinking of you on the 15th and will say an extra prayer for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann Posted December 15, 2003 Author Share Posted December 15, 2003 Thank you friends for all the words of support. I sit here now, thinking that one year ago was the last night Dennis was alive. I have done much soulsearching during the past few days and I must tell you that although I would give anything for a few minutes with him, I would not bring him back to endure the severe pain and suffering he went through. I must thank God for allowing him to leave this life before the pain was any worse or lasted any longer. I pray every day that a cure can be found for this terrible disease. I feel so burdended right now...so alone...so lost...and so confused. Every breath I take seems to put me back exactly where I was one year ago today. On top of all this, I lost a friend to cancer on Friday. His funeral will be on Wednesday. Also, my good friend's mother suffered a severe stroke two weeks ago. After a few days, she was placed on a respirator before they spoke to her daughter. My friend jumped through hoops for over a week and finally had the respirator turned off today. I know how bad the pain is for everyone dealing with death at this time of the year !!! Please, keep me in your prayers that I will be strong during the next few days. I pray that I will sleep during the night (thank goodness for Ambien). You all have no idea how helpful you have been . You are very loved and appreciated! Thanks so much!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiny Posted December 15, 2003 Share Posted December 15, 2003 Dear Ann, The pain is always hard, and the holidays and other traumas in your life can only be adding to it. Blessings for surcease and God's grace being asked for you and yours. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shirleyb Posted December 15, 2003 Share Posted December 15, 2003 Ann, I have been thinking about you all day. I wish for you enough....... Much love, Shirley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilyjohn Posted December 18, 2003 Share Posted December 18, 2003 Dearest Ann I am so sorry to see you going through the pain of the aniversary dates. I wish I could have been here for you as you were for me just a couple of weeks ago when I faced the same things. Unfortunately with my move I just got my computer up and running today. I understand so well how you feel. The pain in some ways is even sharper than it was last year. At that time we had the shock to cusion some of the pain but now reality hits with a vengence. I still have some very bad days but in some ways it has gotten a little easier sense those aniversary days are past. The pain never really goes away but I am learning better how to cope with it. I think too that so many changes in my life right now has made the time harder in some ways but easier too if that makes any sense. Once more I say that you are in my thoughts and I thank you again for being there for me at one of the worst times of my life. My God smile down on you and make the holidays peaceful. I can not think of more to ask for you or myself. Lillian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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