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Been Away - Checking Back In


Katy66

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Hi everyone! It has been some time since I've posted. Things have just been so busy. Cassie and I took our beach trip. We had a good time but missed Gene VERY much. It was a good break for us all I think. He realized he could do a bit more for himself than he realized and I learned to let him:)

He had chemo today, day two of round three. Got results of latest CT scan last week. No spreading, the remaining 2 involved lymph nodes have decreased in size and the lung "leision" had not shrunk but was cavernous. Apparently this tells the that some of the cells are apparently dead but still there. The ONC was pleased. Why would they call it a leision vs. a tumor this time? Just wondering.

Gene is pretty down despite the good results. His STD is running out in Oct and he will transition to LTD...I guess that seems pretty final to him. I for one don't care if he ever works again, as long as he is around:)

Gotta run and pick up my daughter, first day of school here. She started 1st grade.

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Katy - Glad you got a break. So sorry that Gene is down, that does have a sense of finality. Congrats on the good news! I know that some of the targeted therapies dissolve the tumors from the inside out so they are hollow and collapse upon themselves.

Hope your daughter had a good back to school day, 1st grade is such a great time for kids!

Sending you thoughts and prayers.

Kathleen

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Katy-

I am so glad you got to get away for a while - I am sure you needed that BIG time.

Congrats to Gene for the good scan - I remember when I was on Avastin the onc was so excited about the hole in the middle of my tumor - guess thats how they start to die!!!

Tell Gene to keep up the good work!!!!

Hugs - Patti B.

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Any advice from the survivors on helping him through this? I keep telling him that it doesn't matter to me if he ever works again as long as he is here but I know that is probably not comforting. He has worked since he left home at 16years old. That is all he knows. I think men identify so much as the provider and through their work that not working is just something they never thought about. Financially we are fine. He has STD that will transition to LTD and will pay until 65. His insurance is great so we certainly aren't hurting there. I do believe that he feels he should be "taking care of us"....I just wish he knew that he has and does with his daily fight against cancer.

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Gene IS taking care of you. Having both the STD and the LTD meant that he was thinking about taking care of you no matter what. I will wager that there are many of us out here who do not have diasblility policies.

The scan results are great. They are really good news!

Susan

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That is the thing. He sees the LTD as final...never working again. I understand that they won't hold his current job longer but it doesn't mean you won't ever go back to work there or somewhere else. He works with a great bunch of people and I know he likes his job but he could like another job just as well, maybe better. And if he isn't ever able to go back to work so what in my opinion...he can cook and clean for me to work :lol:

He has more than taken care of me and Cassie. He has STD, LTD and life insurance policies out the ying yang. We have a home with a reasonably priced mortgage at his instance so "if one of us couldn't work the other could manage it". It is filled with loving memories and all the things we need and most of what we want. You know, I should be telling him this, not you guys :wink:

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Katy, congratulations to Gene on the great scans. And to you for your help in caring so well for him physically and emotionally. It is true that men and women today (but probably men even more so) define themselves by the positions they hold in the "working" world. Probably the best thing to do is to tell Gene you understand how he probably feels and that you can't really fix it. Assure him that he will in time find a way to adjust, whether it be reassuring himself that he will find another job like the one he loved or even take an entire new path. He may decide when he kicks the cancer and gets more energy back that he'll satisfy himself with some meaningful volunteer work. I'm a good bit older than he, but doesn't it sound like I've already given this a lot of thought lol? It's tough suddenly not working (had worked since 14 yrs old in the blueberry packing plant) and being sick. I just keep hoping the day will come when I'm well enough to consider: Yes, that's what I'd like to do for the rest of my life. And Gene's got a lot longer time to figure it out in than I do at age 65. Good luck to you both.

Judy in Key West

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