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A letter to My Mom


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Mom- We still miss you everyday. Sometimes I still have total disbelief that you are not here. It will just hit me and for a moment I'm totally present to your absence, it is overwhelming at times. The most difficult part is that you never held your only grandaughter Savannah. I try to imagine what this journey would have been like if you were here for me and for Savannah. She definately knows you. Your picture hangs in her room and we say "good morning Grandma Pat" and "goodnight Grandma Pat" everyday. She also loves to look at the "special" Grandma Pat book. I have also introduced her to Bob Marley. When I play it on the way to daycare she smiles and says "Bob Marley" and I say "Grandma Pat music". The other day we were just hanging out in bed and she said (out of the blue)..."I like Grandma Pat". I said "I like Grandma Pat too". It's funny that she seems to be integrating you into her life. I find comfort in that. But, it just isn't the same without you. There will always be saddness in my heart. We just didn't have enough time on earth together. The other I day I pulled out the last birthday card you gave me, like I do every year on my birthday (it was handmade because you were too sick to go to the store). I find soo much comfort in the words you wrote: "I will always be with her in spirit and thought. I love this special daughter of mine. More than she can ever know in just one lifetime." Now that I'm a mom, I can experience your love for me in a way that I couldn't before Savannah was born. As I experience the love that a mother is capable of I think of you. I think that is the greatest gift you gave me. Thank you!

XO Candy

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What a beautiful tribute to your mother Pat. And I am in awe at the effort you've made to make her known to your daughter. I think it takes a special daughter to do that. I'm reading this a day late and hope yesterday passed gently for you.

Judy in KW

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What a beautiful letter to your Mom. I, too, think it is incredible how you are integrating her into your daughter's life. Grandma will be watching over her for the rest of her life.

My Mom died of lung cancer and her birthday is July 31, so it is a bittersweet day of memories for me of her. She's been gone 14 years now. It seems like I just chatted with her yesterday.

Thank you for sharing your memories, and your new daughter with us. This is sad, but good to read.


Judy in MI

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