David A Posted June 10, 2004 Share Posted June 10, 2004 Redneck Valentine Poem Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you. Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze. Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas. You move like the bass, which excite me in May. You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway. Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan. Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can. You have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud; I hold my head high when we're in a crowd. On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms, well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms. Still them fellers at work, they all want to know, what I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe. Like a good roll of duct tape yo're there fer yore man, to patch up life's troubles and fix what you can. Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead. You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed. Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt, you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt. When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack, my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack. Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'. despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'. Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank, we go together like a skunk goes with stank. Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day; They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way. Some men git roses on that special day from the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say. Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth. "Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth. But for this man, honey, these won't do. Cause yor'e too special, you sweet thang you. I got you a gift, without taste nor odor, more useful than diamonds... IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nushka Posted June 11, 2004 Share Posted June 11, 2004 Cute! Nina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted June 11, 2004 Share Posted June 11, 2004 I feel guilty saying so, but I really enjoyed this. I know lots of rednecks and the poet here did them proud! Even I give the guys a point for this. elaine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angie Daughter of Bill Posted June 11, 2004 Share Posted June 11, 2004 O.K. David, did you find my last Valentine's Day card from my hubby?? Remember, I am a redneck from Alabama! Cute! Angie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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