beat it

Ry, I updated the Profile, hope I did that right. After reading it maybe I'm not a newbie anymore?? What a rollercoaster and I'm just a family member .... Beat it!!

OK, so when these words where first spoken, being a newcomer to cancer I thought what the ....???? I have always understood that it seemed AFTER a person was dx with cancer and the chemo started THATS when they went down hill. My MIL has Stage 4 NSCLC. Since main stream medicine cant "do anything for her" the Onc said " ....at this point the chemo is not to cure but rather to control pain and better the remaining quality of life..... Can ANYONE explain this madness to me??? We have went from a person maintaining a fairly normal life (yes there is the need for pain meds) she was working and shopping and playing with her granddaughter, still living...... One day of "Feeling REALLY good" after the first round of chemo and now on the second day, she cant eat, pukes, very dizzy, wobbles when she walks, rashes, in bed, cant function and THIS IS QUALITY OF LIFE??? Can anyone reason me through this? I fear she'll give up, she's so ill. How do I promote "positve thinking, complementary treatments, you can do this, you'll make it?" AAAGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!! Beat it!! (did I mean the cancer or the chemo? )

I so appreciate your responses!! It is helpful to at least try to see a little out in the future. I try really hard to help the family remain pro-active even if only with knowledge. I am very greatful for the good day she had yesterday. Smiles galore, but I know this is temporary. I very gently remind the family here and there with a nudge by reading one or two of these responses for instance. Cancer is such a roller coaster I guess I try to soften the crash after such a high, with out killing the high. Hope that sounds ok. Sharon!! Yes we where greatful for your advice and actually today we are going to get her wig, my have they come soooo far with those!! Perfect colors and such an incredible match I was shocked. Good to do that while there is still hair to match!! Thanksgiving will be day 13..... but you know this fight can strenghten one sooo much, ironic, I suppose. Well Thanks again to all who help me to learn and guide our family. I appreciate each and every response so much, I'll keep in touch!! Beat it!!

Well Folks we've made it to the first round of chemo. Started yesterday. Today my MIL feels better than she has since before this all started this morning. I think I have read this is common for first round in the first couple days, then does the fatigue hit? Around day 14 is the hair loss and neasua is possible thru out? Shes 1 time every 21 days, Carbo/Taxol/Avatin. Stage 4 NSCLC. Anyone? Thanks! Beat it!!

My MIL had an experience for the first time last night while sleeping. Apparently she woke up and was unable to catch her breath??? Could this be a panic attack? Shes never had any attacks before. Fluid in the pluera? She has stage 4 NSCLC. She was fine through out the day today. One Onc told us the cancer had spread to the pluera (which we knew) and he felt the it was invading the diaphragm too. Given this thought process and her experience does anyone want to comment on just their thoughts? She is due to start chemo next week and I will be certain the Onc is told about this. But of course I come to all of you for your thoughts as every theroy here is worthy of consideration. And well honestly it helps me to talk to you all, very comforting, regardless of the honstey in our postings. Thanks, Beat it!! Many Thank you's, Beat it!!

Hello, Welcome! You have landed in a very safe zone here. You will find a tremendous support level (as you can see) and you can LEARN alot FAST. My MIL was diagnosised with in the last 3 weeks with stage 4 lung cancer and the doctors have pretty much told her to do whatever, it wont make a difference! DONT BELIEVE THIS!!!!!!!!!! There are thousands of people living and dealing with cancer. Nutrition nutrition nutrition!!! Supplements for vitamins. There can be hope if you MIL has it in her yet!!! You (obviously) will get a "hands are tied" attitude from the doctors. Dont except it, keep a GOOD dotor posted and involved but seek information on nutrition and supplements it could help. Most of all we will all be prayerful for you and one more thing, come back here to this site often you'd be amazed at the info and support. I sure have been in just 3 short weeks! Beat it!!!!

Dah.......sure THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!

What is a brain met?

You've entered a great support system here. Welcome. Sorry to hear things are this why for you now. Being a new person to cancer and this post I might not have much to offer you. I have just this morning been studing on Hospice and read a booklet they have on things to look for before a person passes away. I would suggest you contact hospice to get some info, help and support. They can guide you even if this is not her time. They are a wonderful source of help. Prayerfully, Beat it!!

Nutbar Your honesty and senitivity are so helpful to the newbies here. Sometimes I see so much medical knowledge I wonder if anyone feels like I have sometimes. I am greatful to your posting!!!! Hey, Who hasnt mis-interpeted their boss anyway?? Beat it!!

Any thoughts on an Onc not rushing to chemo at stage 4? I thought that was their main deal. Chemo and treatment asap. It may be as long as 3 weeks, if radiation is a possiblility. The Onc never time tabled the cancer. (Not that I approve of that anyway) but wonder if others have had similar experiences? Beat it!!

Having joined here recently myself I havent any words of wisdom in terms of the medical aspect. I would only offer dont be too hard on your Grandmother not seeing things as the worst. You weren't told he passed away today. You still have precious moments to create. Sometimes in this battle you have to see the positive in the seemingly impossible. Best to you and your family. You will find loads of support here. Poeple care and you can always express your feelings. Beat it!!

Any one with a survivor story? Got a decent doctor (onc) with Great bedside manner. States this is Un-curable, though. Statisticly speaking. Any body dispute it? We're OK, understanding well I think. Still thinking positive if even for better quality of days remaining. Anyway............stage 4 what your thoughts? Beat it!!

Is there any point? If the docotrs are all co-workers would the second opinion be any different? What does any one know about PDQ/Physicians Data Query? Has anyone had a Doctor use this or have you ever asked them too? Thanks for helping!! ( Yet again!) Beat it!!

I questioned the stage too Quote " Stage 3 Invasive" I had read about 3a or 3b but not invasive. The nurse said they dont use a or b anymore???Also during our pathology appt the nurse contridicted herself more than once. Re-reading my notes I can see that. Ultimatly we need the Professianal to talk to, I dont have hard feelings towards her at all. We just arent clear yet. She couldnt tell me what type cell either which I thought was interesting, just that it was Non Small cell???? Beat it!!

SEEKING COUNCIL OR A LEADER IN CLERGY IS VITAL!!! You have made the first step by expressing your feelings and that is so healthy. Talking it thru can make such a difference. Your mom would be so proud of you for seeking comfort and not bottleing it up inside. Find something you can place your faith in and then lean on that. Dont stop posting, keep your feelings flowing even if in writing here. You have what it takes never forget that!!! Beat it!

How often do any of you hear of Nutrition playing a large role in treatments? Can it make a differnce? Anyone incorporated it into/with consistant treatment? Gotta ask, I'm so new to this. Beat it!!

I knew you guys would be there !! Yep, we'll be OK. Uphill from here I guess but thats ok. Thanks for all the advice and concern. WOW instant family!! Cool!! Week and a half ago I bought a 3 ring binder and have been putting survivor stories in it almost daily, along with easy to read facts on cancer stages and terms I have cut and pasted to be Lay person friendly for the family. I know all have used it at some point. I push, positve thoughts and while been realistic with them - demand nothing but the best possible attitudes for recovery. Reminding them I could be killed in an accident too before cancer took her. I too have already been in 2 appts with notebooks for answers and recording the info as it comes for refreshing us later. It's tough to be leaned on for support by many but apparently it is my calling for this time and I will. Having a place to come like this is super. It helps to regenerate the drive to get back at it. I'll be around now so I hope to meet many of you and appreciate all the compasion I have received this far! Blessings to all! Beat it!!

Well I'm here for awhile folks. NSCLC, Stage 3 Invasive, Multiple spots, both lungs, Lymphs on airway and about 6 inches on spine. sizes like 1.8 x 1.6 x 1.9 and 1.8 x 1.8 with pulera thicking. No radition per the pulmanary doc today, to extensive. Appt on Monday with Oncologist. Worried about the stamina in my mother in law. maybe its early yet......maybe she'll get to fighting soon......... So you've all been there. Suggestions? Lay persons definition of Invasive stage 3? I would fight like a starving lion who's cub had just been attacked.....but I'm not the one with the cancer. Thoughts? Beat it!!

With a pending diagnosis coming in 2 days anyone want to offer in lay persons terms the big difference and treatment options between Small cell and Non small cell? I mean generally of course. I have learned each patient is different. This site is so helpful to read the emotions of families and learn first hand experinces. I am so greatful,truly. 2 spots, one on each lung and enlarged lymphs on air way and spine on mother in law. She is in pain and on Oxycon (sp?) Thanks to all, Beat it!!!

Your a testimony to your Mom, she'd be proud of your continued fight. Always be a voice, keep her fighting. Blessing to you and your family!!!!

Yes she's here too. Biopsy in Mankato tomorrow then the diagnosis wed. trying to be pro active in learning of all places to go. You obviously have been blessed, guess its hard to go forward with out knowing small or non cell ect huh? I went to grade school in Worschter Mass. Thanks for helping!!!

What a family there is here at LCSC! My first instinct (and many will disagree) is that there is a blessing in cancer. (Glad I'm not in arms length of any of you) The blessing in this I see right of the bat is this family of complete strangers reaching out to other strangers with the sole intent to help, support and love others in a time of need. Incredible!! Here's the facts, now I feel comfortable posting seeing the compasion. I am a female who's mother in law is quite possibly the best friend I've ever had. We are near Mankato Mn. 4 weeks ago my husband and I where alerted to my mother in laws chiro appts due to a hurting back. Ibuphropin and streching where the outcome. My initial concern was her complaint of pain in deeper breaths. Having been a smoker for 3/4 of her life, I worried. After several chiro and a MD visit for the back she went back to the clinic for another reason (now I wonder if she knew in her heart already) seems a girl at work had quit smoking on the patch and my mother in law wanted to quit now too. So she went in to get the patch. On the way in to the clinic she coughed up some blood. Just alittle. But thank god she mentioned it and they did a chest Xray. Follwed by the immediate CT, scheduled for the PET scan (this sounding familiar to all of you? I bet) We have had the Pulmanary visit who said we need a biopsy (needle), no surgery, 90% cancer, spots on both lungs, lymphs on air way and spine enlarged (or lit up as I see some write about). Tomorrow is the biopsy, 3 days is the reading of that. I am trying with every breath to promote positive attitudes in the family. I realize if God calls he calls but want this to be the best possible situation it can be, and believe that can only come from HOPE, not false hope because I dont believe hope can be that, but give this the most effort of anything we've ever done for the least return of better days remaining. Make sense? I have started a notebook where I put information about everything I can get my hands on for the family. I take notes at the appts and print them off after to put in there. The first section has only survivor stories. I encourage every one to read these at the first sign of depression. I am NOT living in a fantasy world, I know the odds. But this can be 2 different experiences depending on how we procede, I am pushing for the better. Hope I make sense. I will be getting on these site provided by my new friends right away. We want to use medical, natural, nutrition, spiritual and pain relief methods together to try. Sorta like I see at Cancer Treatment Centers of America. Anyone have opinions on them? Again, Thanks fpr caring, Thanks for sharing, Thanks for teaching. You are all BLESSINGS thru your pain! Beat it!!

Each one of you brings me hope!!! Support of strangers, caring, understanding, compassion. Why cant the world be this way with out cancer? We are 1 week into this, formal diagnosis in 4 days. Each post shows me hope. Thank you already. Beat it!!!

Wow!! Thanks for replying. I obviously didnt log on right as you all have more info than I have but i'll learn. At the bottom of the post everyone has a history, how'd you get it, do you write it each time? Should I ? See the last post for me. Hope it starts, we're still in a fog. Only 1 week in to this. But I want to shine thru it towards hope regardless for everyones sake, looking for knowledge and insight. I supose any thought sonly posting correctly could help 'ey? : ) Beat it!!