Nova

You have every right to feel angry. It's not fair, it's uncalled for, it's cruel....Even now I don't understand why it happens to so many 'good' people. My son was 13 when his dad was diagnosed...your babies are even younger. Please feel free to PM me if there's anything at all I can do. You're in my thoughts.

Hi Sarah, My name is Nova and I was an every day visiter here a few years ago. You'll find the people here very helpful and kind. I'm so sorry that your husband has been diagnosed with SCLC. It's very scary in the beginning. Thinking back, I'd say it's important that you have a doctor that is really willing to take the time to talk and explain everything to you. If you don't feel comfortable with him/her, don't be afraid to find another one. I made the mistake of reading too much info on SCLC. It's good to be informed, but not to overwhelm yourself with too much, as every case is different, as are the side effects of the treatments, etc. If there's anything at all I can help with, please let me know. You're in my thoughts, Nova

Miss you, Patti.

Hi Ginny, Thanks for writing. Sounds as if we have similar backgrounds. Guess it makes some people stronger, and some more worn out! LOL! I'm in the worn out section right now, although I'm not at all having a pity party either. (What's the use in that? Just uses up more energy and accomplishes nothing. And there's always someone that has it way worse, of course.) I simply want to know how to get better. Surely it will kick in some day soon. Thanks so much. Take care, Nova

Thank you, Ann. Appreciate hearing from you. Hope you're doing okay.

Thanks Barb, I appreciate you sharing your story with me. At least there's hope in sight, I guess. Blah! Thanks so much, Take care.

Hi Ellie, Thanks for taking the time to respond. I appreciate it. My hubby was a handsome fella, thanks. That picture doesn't really even do him justice, as it came out a little fuzzy and crooked. He was Slovakian and English, his maternal grandparents coming straight off the boat from Slovakia. I sure miss his big blue eyes........ sigh. Thanks. Take care.

Cancer is just scary, no matter what kind. Those of us that have dealt with it in some way or another, realize that it CAN be dealt with, but to those that haven't... well, I think it just plain scares them to bits and they don't know how to react. I babysat with 2 of my little grandsons today, which helped chirk me up. They're the cutest little guys. And after grandma-ing FIVE little boys, we finally got a sweet little girl added to the mix last month. (She has my middle name of Beth. I'm so proud). Thanks everyone. I appreciate you.

Hi Judy, Thanks for writing. It's so good to "see" familiar faces again. I'm sorry you haven't been given the NED label yet, but I'll be saying lot's of prayers that it's soon to come. I appreciate the good thoughts. It's made me feel better to come here again and chat with folks. Makes a person feel not so alone and a bit more understood, ya know? I love my family members to pieces, but they've started giving each other "the look" sometimes, as if they're all thinking "What's wrong with her and why is she so sad ~ AKA: Shouldn't she have gotten over this by now"? Makes me feel somewhat alienated from them. Take care of yourself. I'll be looking for your updated signature. I'm commanding NED to come into your life. Love, Nova

It's nice to meet you and thanks for writing. You've had an over-abundance of sorrow in your life, and I'm so sorry. Glad to hear that your faith has helped you along. Mine waivers from strong to barely there lately. I think the Lord understands though. I am very happy to see that you are "NED" ! I fell in love with NED as soon as I found out what he stood for. Please take care and thank you for writing.

((((((Kasey and Sue))))). I remember both of you and have thought of you so many times. Just didn't want to spread my misery around, as each of the members here are dealing with their own sad times. Sue, I didn't want to say anything, but I'm exactly like you. I have Crohn's Disease that has gotten out of control, plus a few heart valve issues, so I have applied for SS Disability. Being approved (or not) takes years here in Florida, so I'm in the same boat as you, health-wise and financially. There always seems to be something in my house breaking, and never something that can wait to be fixed. (Water lines that have burst under the house, AC breaking, etc.) I'm sure you can relate. All of those repairs take money, and that's scarcer then hens teeth here. Harry was our sole provider and now I receive a tweency amount from Social Security for our son, because he was a minor when Harry passed away. That will be ending in 4 months when Jake turns 18, so I don't know what will happen after that. It's a bit of a worry, to say the least. Things sure pile up. Like grieving alone isn't enough? Thanks so much everyone. It was good to hear from all of you again. I appreciated you years ago, and still do. Thanks for the boost. I don't have a Facebook page, but maybe I'll see if I can figure out how to fix one up, to be able to keep in touch. I miss you all. You're the only people I know that have "been there, done that".

Thank you Eric, and it's nice to meet you. I appreciate your response and well wishes.

Thank you "Lilyjohn" and Katie. I appreciate your responses so much. I think a lot of the problem is that I expected myself to feel better, not worse, but I've heard several times now, that for some reason, the second year is worse then the first, so maybe I'm not so abnormal. (crossing fingers). I had to smile when you said that you probably drove people here on the Board crazy...... If I look back at some of the posts I wrote when Harry was battling the cancer, I think "Why on earth did I write that?" Bad times, bad reactions, unreal circumstances maybe..... I'm "trying my best" to get over this horrrible, sad place in my life. Guess that's the key ~ getting over the hump. Thank you all for sharing. Hope I get to a point in my life sometime soon, that I can offer hope to someone else. Take care and God Bless.

That gives me hope. I still try not to listen to the radio. It's hard to cry and drive at the same time. Take care, and thanks.

Thanks Randy. Wish grief came with an expiration date. Thanks for taking the time to respond.

I'm not even sure that anyone here will remember me, but I sure used to spend a lot of time on this Board. Found very good support and a few lifelong friends. My question is on grieving. It's been two years and four months since my husband Harry passed away from SCLC. I've tried everything to feel better, knowing that it would/should come gradually. I've been to in-person bereavement meetings which helped for a while, but then seemed to make things worse because I was involved with people that were even more depressed then myself. I stopped going, needless to say. I know everyone is different, but I'd like to hear how long it took for others to stop feeling half dead and start really living again. My smile is broken along with my heart. Thanks for any input. Bless you all and know that I think of you often, Nova

My thoughts are with your family. Don reached out the hand of friendship to my husband, Harry, when we first found out he had cancer. God Bless you all. Nova

Debbie, I understand, and will be thinking of you. Take care, Nova

Thinking of you daily, Patti.

New babies are the very best for making a smile appear on my face. Congratulations to you! What's the little guy's name? Take care, Nova

I'm so very sorry. God Bless you.

Teri, I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I understand. The longer Harry is gone, the more I miss him. I'm still waiting for him to come home. Waiting to wake up from this nightmare. Wish there was something I could say to help, but I'm stumped. Praying for you, Nova

I'm sorry. I can understand the work situation. I still haven't gone and applied for a job. Our sons sound quite alike. Mine (Jacob) is 15. He's played f-ball since he was 5 years old. He skipped last year to spend time with his dad. He was going to skip this season too, but the Coach called and talked to him. He asked him to just come to a few practices, and if he didn't feel like playing, that was okay.So far he's sticking with it. Do you know the coach for your son's team? Maybe it would help if he could talk to him. I wish I knew the answer for you, as to how we're supposed to be a mother and father both to these boys, but I don't know. Just love them extra, I guess. You're in my thoughts. Nova

Debbie, I'm so sorry. I wish I could tell you that you'll feel better soon, but I can't . Guess everyone is different, but I'm like you--still very married, and waiting for my husband to pull up in the driveway at any minute. If there's anything at all I can do to help, please let me know. Love, Nova

Hi Teri, It's unbelievable that a year has passed already. I've thought of you often, wondering how you were doing. You spoke of a deep heavy sadness, and I understand that too well. It's a feeling that you can't describe to people that have never been thru this. I keep expecting Harry to drive up , come in the house, and ask "What's for dinner"? I've asked a couple of other's what they think we will be like in 10 years... We all hope the same, as in "normal", but I'm not sure we'll ever be our "old selves" again. Take care of yourself. Know I think of you often. Nova