lilyjohn
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Posts posted by lilyjohn
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A man was running late for his weekly golf. Somehow a doctors appointment had gotten scheduled just a half hour before his game. To save time he grabed a few extra balls and put them in his pocket.
When he got to the doctors office he noticed the receptionist staring at his groin area. He realized he had the balls in his pocket and just said "golf balls'.
A few minutes later he saw a blond woman staring at him. Once again he said "golf balls". She kept staring for a while and he asked if something was wrong. She replied " I was just wondering it that hurts as bad as tennis elbow."
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Where Is God??
>
>Two little brothers were always in trouble in the town
>they lived in. The parents decided the only thing to do
>was to have the new Priest in town talk to them. The
>Priest agreed but he said, only one at a time.
>
>So Billy went first. The Priest walked into the room
>where Billy was sitting and asked, "Where is God"?
>Billy just sat there starring at the floor so the Priest
>asked again, in a louder voice, "Where is God"?
>Billy started to squirm in his chair when in a booming
>voice, the Priest asked ,"Where is God"?
>
>At this point, Billy jumped up, ran out of the room,
>down the street into his house , up the stairs, into his
>room and stood leaning against the door making sure he
>hadn't been followed.
>
>His brother Bobby asked him. "What happened"? And Billy
>said, "You are not going to believe this, but God is
>missing and they're trying to blame us"!!!!
_________________________________________________________________
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>
>========================================
>
>Two elderly Wal-Mart greeters were sitting on a bench during break time and
>one turns to the other asking,"Slim, I'm 73 years old and I'm just full of
>aches and pains. I know you are about my age. How do you feel?'
>
>Slim says, " I feel just like a new born babe."
>
>Rather amazed his coworker repeats his statement in the form of a question,
>"Really? A new born babe???"
>
>"Yup", grins Slim, " No teeth, No hair, and I think I just wet my pants.
>
>---------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>Eve chats with God...
>
>"Lord, I have a problem."
>
>"What's the problem, Eve?"
>
>"I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of
>these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, But I'm
>just
>not happy."
>
>"And why is that Eve?"
>
>"Lord, I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples."
>
>Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
>
>"Man? What is that Lord?"
>
>"A flawed creature, with many bad traits. He'll lie, cheat and be vain; all
>in
>all, he'll give you a hard time. But he'll be bigger, faster and will like
>to
>hunt and kill things. I'll create him in such a way that he will satisfy
>your
>physical needs. He will be witless and will revel in childish things like
>fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be as smart as you, so he will
>also need your advice to think properly."
>
>'Sounds great," says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows, "but what's the
>catch Lord?"
>
>Well,..... you can have him on one condition."
>
>"And what's that Lord? "
>
>"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant and self-admiring..... so you'll have
>to
>let him believe that I made him first. And it will have to be our little
>secret........ you know, woman to woman."
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A Letter From Your Daughter
> >
> >A mother enters her daughter's bedroom and sees a letter on the bed. With
> >the
> >worst premonition, she reads it, with trembling hands:
> >
> >It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I eloped
>with
> >my
> >new boyfriend. I found real passion and he is so nice, with all his
> >piercings
> >and tattoos and his big motorcycle.
> >
> >But it's not only that mom, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be
> >very
> >happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children
>with
> >me
> >and that's one of my dreams.
> >
> >I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it
>for
> >us and his friends, who are providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy
> >we
> >may want.
> >
> >In the meantime, we'll pray for the science to find the AIDS cure, for
> >Ahmed
> >to get better, he deserves it. Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and
>I
> >know how to take care of myself. Some day I'll visit for you to know your
> >grandchildren.
> >
> > Your daughter,
> > Judith
> >
> >PS: Mom, it's not true. I'm at the neighbor's house. I just wanted to
>show
> >you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my
> >desk's
> >drawer...I love you!
> >
>
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1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now
that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.
2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you
3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me.
4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably
need it again.
5. Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside card) - Someone other than you.
6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!
7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me..
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your
promise.
8. We've been friends for a very long time..
(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?
9. I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.
10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?
11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was
only one life jacket...
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.
12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your
birthday...
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.
13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Alabama, Mississippi,
and West Virginia)
14.Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but
wonder...
(Inside card) - What was I thinking?
15. Congratulations on your wedding day!...
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your wife
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something
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Hope I will tell you that your post hit me like a hammer between the eyes. The things that you are talking about have been my nightmare for months a nightmare that never ends.
Your Mom may be in denial to you but inside she knows what is going on. Keeping the word Cancer out of the conversation and not allowing people to insist that she is dying is the way she is coping with her illness. Believe me you don't want to see the other side. Once that hope is gone and the word Cancer is spoken continuously she will not be able to forget it for even one minute. Fear is one of the most life threatening side effects of cancer. I know because I not only lived with it but I saw that fear take the person that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
Anxiety not only weakens the mind it weakens the imune system and makes it harder for treatments to do their job. When a person is constantly called on to sign a DNR they are being told "you are going to die. Make it easy on yourself and everyone else." I watched as one doctor after another tried to force Johnny to sign a DNR. They used every tactic they could think of but still he refused. All their efforts did was cause the anxiety to get worse. One *ss of a doctor even refused to treat him because he wouldn't sign a DNR and that ultimately led to his death. I sat with him after a doctor told him that once a person is on a resperator they will never be able to breathe on thier own. He was trying to scare Johnny into signing that DNR but it didn't work. Instead he asked me "why is everyone so intent on letting me die?"
You don't forget those things Hope. They become a part of your life. Your mom is doing what she has to do to survive. As Becky said so well you may be watching but SHE is the one facing Cancer. She is the one who has to decide just how much she is willing to endure to live. It is her body, her life and her choice. No one has the right to take that from her.
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Andrea my heart breaks for your pain. Those first few weeks are so difficult because we are still in shock and as the shock starts to wear off we feel both the shock and the pain. That feeling of being in a nightmare is very normal. I think all of us keep waiting to wake up and have our loved one still with us. As reality starts to take over that feeling will come and go. It has been nearly 17 months sense Johnny's death and at times I still wait for my nightmare to end. I think that is in someway our minds way of getting us through some of the hardest times.
As far as your little girl is concerned I will tell you something. Children see and feel things that we have trained ourselves not to. We see something that makes us believe that our loved one is still with us and ignore them thinking that our grief is making our minds see things that we want to see. Children have not had their minds corrupted like we have. They see and hear and accept those things. You see your daughter as missing your mom and pretending to talk to her. Have you ever considered the posibility that she does hear your mom and is talking to her? I really believe that our loved ones are still near us and that they come to children more than adults so those children learn to miss them graduallly. That saves them from much trauma and emotional problems.
Johnny's grandson was two years old when Johnny died. The last time he saw him that Sunday before his death when no one else believed that he would die because we knew more his grandson looked at him and told his mother"it is time for Paw Paw to go home." He still talks to him on the phone on occasion and even told his parents that his Paw Paw was going camping with them. After his death that child never asked for him for nearly three weeks. He was at the memorial and had seen us together for months yet when he saw me he never asked for Johnny nor asked about him. I will always believe that was because Johnny was still with him. It was only us that could not see him.
I'm telling you these things because I don't want you to suffer more pain because of what your child may be feeling. Bearing your own pain is hard enough. I will just say keep an open mind and maybe you will be lucky enough to realize that your mom is still with you. No it won't ease the pain of her physical loss but it will make it easier to cope with the coming days of heartache. Lillian
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Becky you will never know what an inspiration you are. I saw so many of the things you are talking about while Johnny was fighting his battle. It was very difficult for me but nothing like it had to be for him. Describing it from the patient's view as you have makes me even see things that I missed. I'm sure that this advice will be of great help to many just starting out on this ride. I only wish I would have had someone to point those things out to me in the beginning.
I would like to add just one thing. There are times that a caregiver is forced to make split second decisions. You have to know what you are facing and what the patient's wishes are. Be certain that you as an advocate are given all of the information required to make a decision from knowledge not panic. If the battle is later lost you will have a lot of things to question make sure that you do not have to live with the knowledge that your panic and lack of acceptense caused you to make uninformed choices.
Caregiving is a very hard thing to do but as Becky says it is doable. You really have no choice but to do it and do it the very best you can. Watching what a loved one is going through both physically and especially emotionally can knock you down everyday. It can also give you the oportunity to do the most good you will ever do and feel some of the strongest emotions you will ever feel. Still what you feel is not half what the patient feels. Take Becky's advice and learn to handle your part of the ride. Until you do you will be no good to yourself nor the person you love.
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> After getting all of Pope John Paul's luggage loaded into the
> > limo (and he doesn't travel light), the driver notices that the
> >Pope is still
> > standing on the curb.
> >
> > "Excuse me, Your Holiness," says the driver, "Would you
> > please take your seat so we can leave?"
> >
> > "Well, to tell you the truth, " says the Pope, "They never
> > let me drive at the Vatican, and I'd really like to drive
> >today."
> >
> > "I'm sorry but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job! And
> > what if something should happen?" protests the driver, wishing
> >he'd
> > never gone to work that morning.
> >
> > "There might be something extra in it for you," says the Pope.
> >
> > Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in
> > behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision
> >when, after
> > exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating
> >the limo to 105
> > mph.
> >
> > "Please slow down, Your Holiness!!!!" pleads the worried
> > driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they
> >hear sirens.
> >
> > "Oh, dear God, I'm gonna lose my license," moans the driver.
> > The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop
> > approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his
> >motorcycle, and
> > gets on the radio.
> >
> > "I need to talk to the Chief," he says to the dispatcher.
> >
> > The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's
> > stopped a limo going a hundred and five.
> >
> > "So bust him," said the Chief.
> >
> > "I don't think we want to do that, he's really important,"
> > said the cop.
> > !
> > The Chief exclaimed, "All the more reason!"
> >
> > "No, I mean really important," said the cop.
> >
> > The Chief then asked, "Who ya got there, the Mayor?"
> >
> > Cop : "Bigger."
> >
> > Chief: "Governor?"
> >
> > Cop: "Bigger."
> >
> > "Well," said the Chief, "Who is it?"
> >
> > Cop: "I think it's God!"
> >
> > Chief: "What makes you think it's God?"
> >
> > Cop: "He's got the Pope for a limo driver
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Believe it Norme. It is real. I have had enought things happen that I don't often question them any more. Your Buddy is doing what he always did taking care of his family with love. I am so glad that you learned about that. Lillian
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If I could reach out and hug you I would. You are the same age as my daughter and it breaks my heart that you have to go through this. It breaks my heart that any of us have to go through this. The pain that you are feeling now is because the shock is wearing off. It takes a while for us to feel the full effects of having our heart torn out.
Like you I looked for a miracle up until the last minute. I had asked God for help and thought that he had answered my prayer. I was very angry at God for a while because I thought my faith had betrayed me. Then one day I realized that no matter how much it hurts or how unfair it seems that God did answer my prayer but his answer was "No". I can't pretend to know the reasons that God chose to take your dad or my Johnny or any of the people who die of cancer. I just have to have enough Faith to know that he did what was best to fill his plans for us.
None of that makes the pain any less especially when it finally hits you that this nightmare is real and not one that you will wake up from. I will say that your dad is still with you. Every time you look at your little girl you remember him. Right now those memories only tell you that he is gone but someday they will remind you of who he was and you will remember him as alive and happy. It takes a long time for that to happen but once it does it will happen again and again.
Johnny had a very hard time talking about his loved ones who have died. I used to tell him that he spent so much time remembering their death that he forgot about their life. I find myself doing the same thing that I accused him of. Let me tell you something else. People will tell you that anger is not good for you but you will find that the anger is all that can help you cope at times. Use it when you need it but don't forget to use the love that your dad left you with to reach out to him still for life does end in one way but it goes on forever. Love is life and you love him so he lives. You are the one now who needs to figure out how to live. He no longer has that problem for his spirit is free instead of tied to a body that he didn't need any more.
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I know the fear and desperation that you are feeling now. Like everyone says don't borrow trouble. It could be any number of things. You need to save your strength and pull yourself together. If it is not cancer it could be something else that requires extensive treatment. It could also be something that will be taken care of quickly then all of this will pass. Yes it could be cancer and that is so frightening to think about. The thing is no matter what it is your mom needs you to be strong. You have to pull yourself together to be there for her.
You have support here and you have love with your parents. Those are things that will help you face whatever is ahead. Use that serenity prayer and put your boxing gloves on prepared to fight if you need to. If you fall apart now what will you do if the news is bad? Be determined to be there for both your parents no matter what the outcome is.
One piece of advice that Shelly gave you was given to me one time. Go to a goodwill store and buy and old doll. Take her home and beat on her and slap her and swing her by the arms. Beat her head against the wall if you have to. Do anything it takes to unleash some of that fear and frustration that you feel. It may not make the situation go away but it sure will help relieve some of your stress.
If you are going to exhaust yourself do it this way instead of wringing your hands and falling apart. If fate has decided that you will join all of us on this ride you will need your strength then. While you don't need it put it to good use against all that is going on inside of you. Then be prepared to do battle if you have to. Who knows this may just be a scare to make you see even more than you do already how much your mom means to you. No matter what this turns out to be don't ever forget what you are going through now. It will help you to remember how strong love can be and what are the most important things in life.
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I'm praying that you have the beast on the run and are closing in with your stomping shoes on. Maybe the pain is from too many bunny ears. Really all kiding aside I pray that all will be great. Lillian
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I pray that you know God is holding you in his arms right now as well as your dad. I hate to hear that you are put in such a hard place. Making decisons is always hard. Just say a prayer that God will help you do the right thing. As you have been told if it is done with love it will be the right choice. God bless you and give you strength. I know how much you need that. Lillian
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I bet she is holding out on us. She probably found a festival on her own and doesn't want to share it
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I think that you have a great idea and the oportunity to do some real good if you do it right.
You will find that when dealing with lung cancer there are all of the normal emotions you would expect being faced with such a devistating diagnosis and lung cancer has another full set of emotions to deal with.
The word cancer stirkes terror into the heart of anyone who hears it but add the word lung and you will find a fear and life change so sudden and terrifying that the world seems to tip on it's axis.
One of the biggest problems that cause those emotions is attitude. Not only is a person told that they have a disease that it considered deadly but they are asulted time and again by questions and suggestions that it is somehow their own fault. That they asked for what they got. The first question asked is "do you smoke" and the remark they hear over and over is "oh you must smoke". There is always that insinuation. Often if a person says they don't smoke or never did they are all but accused of lying.
That isn't bad enough there is so much more. Everyone who sees them look at them as if they are dead already. Doctors treat them believing that they are going to die from lung cancer. No matter how good a doctor is or how hard they try if they don't say it in words they do with body language and looks. Facing a disease that makes you short of breath and treatments that add to that feeling are bad enough but add anxiety that is one of the most constant side effects and that shortness of breath gets worse. Imagine yourself being told that you are going to die because you won't be able to breathe then having to live with that feeling of breathlessness. Can you even begin to imagine the fear that can cause?
Then there are the treatments. Most treatments consist of pumping poison in the veins to kill cancer cells but they in turn kill other cells that cause more problems. Radiation has it's own set of problems. Not to mention the fact that other drugs are given without the consideration they would be given in any other disease. Dangerous things are mixed that any other person would never be given. It all goes back to that same attitude that lung cancer is a death sentence. Well look at this board and you will see that people do survive. Yes they have the hardest fight of their lives to face but it can be done. It would just be so much easier if they only had to fight the disease and not that attitude.
Lung cancer not only affects the patient. The caregivers and other loved ones have to live with it too. We have to watch the devistation the diagnosis causes. We lose sleep and miss meals. We drive to appointments and tend to every need the patient has. Our world is just as shattered as theirs is. In one split second the rug is pulled out from under you and you will never feel secure again. You watch your loved one as he or she faces all of the suffering both physical and emotional and it tears your heart out. Not only do you have to watch what the cancer and treatments do to them but you have to see the indignities they face from that attitude that runs through every person you deal with. You do all of those things while trying to keep your own fear in check.
If the person you are caring for dies the roller coaster ride doesn't end. The plunges just get steeper and more twists and turns are added. You have to live with the "whys" and "what ifs'". You suffer a guilt that is not only unreasonable but unstopable. You question every move you made and every decision that was put on you. No matter how little time you had you beat yourself up because you didn't do more research or you wern't more insistant about some things. Constantly you face regrets for what you did and didn't do. They can eat at you night and day. Words that you said that would have been forgotten in any other situation are magnifed. If only I hadn't said that! Did something I said cause fear or make him feel like I didn't care. Did he think I was mad at him or that I had given up on him? Those questions haunt you every day.
Then you realize that your security is gone. While caring for your loved one every pain or sigh caused the fear that a new problem is coming. Once they are gone that fear is bounced back on you. Is the cough I had this morning a sign? What about that pain in my side or my leg could that be cancer? Those are the things that we live with. You face the pain of losing someone who is one of the most important people in your life. Your security is gone. You start to see death in a different way. If the person you lost is your soul mate you no longer have any dreams or hopes. You don't fear death any more you almost anticipate it. Still you fear what leads up to that death. You have just seen the things someone can be subject to and fear that for yourself. Above all you fear the fear.
So if you are going to write a book about cancer and the emotions that go with it do it right. Put some teeth into it and go for the meat of the problem. Show the harm that attitude can cause. Present people as humans facing something that no one should ever have to face. Show not only the devistaion that it causes but the hope that people try to give to eachother. Show how it makes us more compasionate and how we reach out to others trying to support and ease their fears. But don't forget that cancer especially lung cancer is not a personal disease. It effects everyone who comes into contact with it. Maybe that is the reason that people are so afriad of it. Why they try to ignore the disease and in the process forget that the ones fighting it are just as human as they are and at one time felt as secure as they do. That those people lived normal lives until in one brief second their world was changed forever with two words. Lung Cancer.
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There are no words that will comfort you but remember you are in all of our hearts today.
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The best news. Wonderful
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Shirley I understand only too well about those aniversaries. I know that we face many during the year like birthdays, holidays and other things that seemed small at the time. Then there are the BIG ones. The hardest for me was the aniversary of Johnny's death and the days leading up to it. Then of coarse there was Valentines Day, The day we were to be married. It has been nearly 17 months and I still can't stand to see a valentine or a box of candy.
Losing anyone we love is the most terrible thing we will ever face. I've lost both parents and 3 brothers and numerous other family members and friends. Each time they left a part of themselves with me and took part of me with them. I don't even want to imagine the horror of losing a child or grandchild.
Losing you soul mate/ love of your life is far different for many reasons. We share our hearts, minds, souls and bodies. We also share our hopes beliefs and dreams. Then suddenly find ourselves facing life alone. I know it was sudden for me but even had I suspected that it would end so quickly I don't think some things would have been any easier or would be now.
There are just so many feelings that you don't have when you lose someone else. There is the feeling of being adrift in the world alone. All of your dreams and plans are gone. It is as if there is no steady ground beneath your feet. I lost all sense of direction and all purpose for my life. There is no one to share the secret little jokes that you had. No one to just reach out and touch you for a brief second in that special way that says "I love you".
Every little thing makes you want to run to your loved one and share it but there is no one there when you try. They are everywhere but they are not there. You see them every place you look but it is only in your mind because you know that you are alone. The hardest part is the waiting. At first you find yourself waiting to wake from the worst nightmare of your life. Even when it finally sinks in that you are awake and the nightmare is real you still wait. I find myself waiting for his voice or the sound of the nebulizer running. I wait for a touch or the feel his arms around me at night. I wait for a million little things and no matter how much time passes I find myself still waiting.
Maybe I am just waiting until I can join him then again maybe I am just waiting to find a way to really feel alive again. A way to live without the rest of myself. The part of me that was only alive with my Johnny.
Life can be so full of pain but there are some pains that seem almost more than we can stand. Losing the one person that defines your life is the hardest of all.
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Prayers for a good day filled with laughter and sharing and no pain.
-
Amen Fay!
I will say too that you can be by their side 24/7 and sometimes not realize what is really going on. If you are the one and only person to care for your loved one you still have to use the bathroom, eat and sleep at least a few minutes at a time. Especially if you have already gone two nights without sleep.
I will add too that even having something not treated is not as bad as having something done that deliberately causes harm. Something like giving a medication that the patient is allergic to(in his IV) knowing it and after he has refused to take it.
Every case is different. It is always easy to say what you would do when you don't have to face the same situation.
Doctors are not God and sometimes they will try and fail. It is when they don't try or do things that cause harm just because a person has lung cancer and is considered terminal that I object to.
We have to understand that they are not God but so do they
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My niece was about 4 years old when we heard the cat give out a loud screech. Her dad asked what did you do to the cat? Her reply was "well he bit me". "What did you do to the cat?" was a phrase that was used often with her.
One that we had to use on my grandson was "Toothpaste is not for cleaning your butt
" Explaination upon request! -
I realize that I say things sometimes that are very unpopular. It is very frightening to be told that you can not trust the system that you have to depend on for your life or the life of a loved one. All I can say about that is that I wish someone had frightened me into having my guard up. I had complete faith in the system. I never believed that anyone in the medical profession would do something not in the best interest of the patient. Had I known mine and Johnny's situation would have been much different. At the very least his last weeks would not have been the nightmare that they were. I didn't realize what they were doing to him until the last minute as I stood watching him die in disbelief and shock. Even after his death I still trusted the system. I thought that when someone saw the wrong that had been done something would be done about it. I was very wrong. Because he had been diagnosed with lung cancer no one cared. Now I am the one who lives with guilt because I didn't see and do things differently. Losing someone you love is hard but being made a part of their death is much worse. It is an unending nightmare.
Like others I question why the things provided by hospice can not be offered to those fighting for their lives. I can only assume it is because it is much more cost effective to treat someone keeping them comfortable until they die than it is to fight the disease and have them making demands. I even heard an add on the radio advertising one hospice program. It said "if you or your loved one have given up all life saving treatment and expect to die within the next six months call us"
My only personal experience with hospice came while working at the assisted living facility and in corispondence with the man in charge of the national hospice public relations. I found him while searching for information on involuntary euthanasia. He told me that one of the biggest problems he faces in his job is the acts of renegade doctors and nurses that help people to die. Often against their will and long before they are actively dying.
I saw many people on hospice in that assisted living facility and I learned a few things. Most people have a misconception about hospice. We tend to thank of it as one large organization. That is not true. Each hospice program has it's own administration. There are good and bad in all of them. Hospice was oringinally established to ease the dying process in those in the last few weeks of life. Sense then it has been expanded and many people are on it sooner. That is where the problems start.
I saw two cases that show some of the things people need to know about hospice and how different they can be. One lady had COPD. If she needed anything all we had to do was call hospice. She was not in iminate danger of dying. Everything she needed was provided and a call to hospice was answered many times faster than the ones made to a doctor for those not on hospice. She had a skin tear that got infected and she was taken to the hospital and treated. Hospice provided for it. Then one day she got sick. Someone called an ambulance and she was taken to the hospital only to discover that she had pneumonia. She was treated and got over the pneumonia and released. While she was in the hospital hospice came and removed everything they had provided for her, hospital bed, wheel chair and oxygen among other things. We were told it was because she was taken to a hospital that her hospice did not associate with. The last I heard of her she was doing fine and had moved out of state to live with her daughter. Had the pneumonia not been treated when it was she would probably have died.
The other lady was nothing short of a living miracle. She had had her breast removed nearly thirty years ago because of breast cancer. She had suffered many accidents and illnesses. She had congestive heart failure and signed up for hospice. Not long before her heart problem was discovered she had suffered a severe back injury and been put on Morphine. She was never taken off of it. One day she decided that because she was no longer in pain that she would stop taking the morphine so she refused to take it. Hospice got very upset and tried to insist that she take it but still she refused. When severe withdrawal symptoms started they gave her very large doses of Ativan every four hours by hospice orders. I was off one day and when I returned I was told that she was actively dying and her body was shutting down. I saw and knew that the symptoms she was showing were the same things that I had seen with Johnny when he had recieved a very large dose of Ativan but I was allowed to say nothing. She was expected to die at any minute and we were told than under no circumstances could we call 911.
A few days later I went to her room and found her up and looking good. Her sister was with her. I asked what had helped her and she told me that she had refused the Ativan as well as the morphine. She also told me that she had felt like hospice had decided that she was supposed to die. Later she suffered a dislocated shoulder and went back to the hospital. When offered morphine she again refused it. When I left there she was back in her apartment and doing great. She was no longer in a wheel chair but used a walker. She was going to dinner and going out with her family. She was also working on a big art display of her deceased husband's work. He had been an artist. She was alive and well and taking NO morphine. That was 4 months after I had been told that she was actively dying.
So I have very mixed feelings about hospice. Yes they can be very good for people but like any other part of the system they have to be watched because often they have their own agenda just like doctors do.
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I guess I failed to make the point I was trying to. My point is had Johnny been treated for the anxiety and panic attacks he would have never been in the hospital and all of the other things would be non issues. It was their refusal to treat the anxiety that started the process that took his life.
Sisters of St. Michaels
in JUST FOR FUN
Posted
A salesman was driving down a long country road feeling very lonely and in need of company preferably a woman's company. He spotted a sign on the side of the road but thought he had read it wrong so he backed up. Sure enough the sign was pointing down a very long drive way and asking people to visit the prostitutes of St. Michaels.
Now being a man not only was his curiosity arroused but other things as well. He decided he had to find out if what the sign said was true. He turned down the drive way and drove up to the front of a very large building. He rang the bell and a nun came to answer the door. He said 'pardon me Sister but is the sign at the front of the drive correct?" "yes" she replied for $50 you can have fifteen minutes with one of the Sisters to do anything you please."
He wasted no time in taking a $50 from his billfold and handing it over. A very pretty young nun took his hand and led him down the hall. There were several doors along the way but she passed them all up. When they got to the last door she told him to go inside and wait for her there. He opened the door and before he could see where he was the door slammed behind him. As he realized that he was outside once again he saw another sign. It said "Thanks for the donation. You have just been screwed by the Sisters of St. Michaels."