Karma1976 Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 I was on the phone with my mom today when i hear something. I hear my mom say what is wrong to my dad and i think he was in the bathroom with the door shut but i could hear the comotion. He was crying and i felt bad cause he was really upset with it. my mom was like it is ok and i am all frantic on the other end and she is saying his hair is falling out. it made me cry and my mom cry. I am actually over here with one of my sisters now. He is also on some heavy drugs so i think it makes the siutations worse for him. i know last week he called me all weird. his voice is strange too. he is on OC 60's and has percocets in between. so he called last week to tell me how he felt no pain. he was allllllllllllll over the place. it was kind of funny though cause i was in awe when he hung up my mom is like he is high as a kite. The next day they went to radiation then to the dealership to pay off his extra miles on his old car and he drgged her out the the lot to look at all the pretty cars THEN wanted to walk to McDonalds that was a mile away. she said no to that. but when she was on the phone with me telling me this I am like where is he now?? she says, in the sub shop getting us subs. i said, (we were both laughing) umm you might want to go check on the man hoped up on pills. when she did he was trying to buy a few too many things..haha which is funny i guess. he seems to be a lot happier, until they give him a steriod shot the other day which then turns him ugly for a few hours. my mom is stressed though with all that is happening. so far it think the hair is ok, i really can not tell too much of a difference with his hair except for some thinning but i got such a hot flash like i was goign to pass out when it happend when i was on the phone for both of them. i just felt so overwhelmed with stuff just cause you know it will happen but it is almost the kicker to yeah he really is sick and i think for him too. when he got on the phone with me he just kept saying i am just in shock i knew it might happen but i am just in shock. i can only imagine this is goign to get worse for him since the full hair lose hasn't kicked in yet. well hope everyone is well. i was very busy this week at work so had little time to pop in and say hello! just wanted to keep everyone updated and maybe someone can offer some help in how to cope with that whoel shock of hairloss. thanks again guys! i will be online thru out the afternoon and evening so hope to chit chat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Hi Karma, The hair loss is hard especially at first. We had to cut my Moms and shave it in order to keep it from falling into her eyes and face. It made her irritable and she would cry when she was in the bathroom. We shaved it short like Annie Lenox.. Not sure if you know her.. shes from the 80's.... It will take some time but eventually he will get used to it. Does he wear baseball hats? My Mom was always very particular about her hair but when it comes right down to it ... hair is really the least of his worries right? I used to try to take her mind off from it and say Mom I'm just glad that you are getting healthy again and the chemo is making his hair fall out but more importantly it is killling the tumor! and that is a blessing... The drugs made my mother say somethings that I know she would never say... I cried... i thought it was spreading to her brain... Luckily a nurse asked me how i was and i told her my concerns.. she took me aside and said "make sure you stay strong and realize that this is not your mother talking this is her medication and her disease." They did cut back her pills.. and She got me a booklet that explains what she is feeling...so I would under stand her feelings. Eventually things leveled out in time and weren't so "crazy"... I will pray for your father and your family's strength... a good sense of humor does help the situation.... family will laugh together and cry together... and just be there with faith and hope in your heart is all you can do for now. Thinking of you Laurie The other survivors here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma1976 Posted March 2, 2003 Author Share Posted March 2, 2003 Thank you so much laurie!! And yes I know annie lennox..haha. Yeah i feel for him and this whole situation. i know vanity is not the thing to have but i think since he had cancer before and only radiation i think he kind of thought he knew what to expect. I am sure he knew the hair would be falling out BUT i do not think he is prepared for it. and if today made him cry he is goign to cry a lot more which is really goign to make me sad, again this man is the little italian that could. He LOVES hair. But you are right hair is one thing getting better is more important. He does have hats. His local union hats and i think i might get him a nice yankees hat ( i know we are from boston and that is a mortal sin - i am a red sox fan- but he is a yankee fan due to when he was a kid with joe dimaggio and mikey mantle) He will eventually put them one on. Although i may have to break in the rim since he doesn't get that whole cool look thing. His rims are flat as a board. haha. one sad thing though is i do not think he will shave it or it will take him a lot too. I may suggest it to him if he gets upset again this way too that way it may not be as tramatic for him to see the clumps. I just feel bad cause today was definitely a bad day for him ego wise to where i think he realizes he needs to understand that his hair is the last thing he needs to worry about....yet he can't help it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ginnyd Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Karma, Look at my husbands picture. Look ma, no hair! We shaved it when it started to come out in clumps from the radiation. My husband is really not vain, so it didn't seem to bother him that much. Also, all of my women friends went gaga over it and he would get that "I'm still attractive to other woman" look. It has finally begun to grow back. Takes longer after radiation then chemo. Right now he just looks fuzzy and cute. Since he is blond (I was hoping it would come in gray) it really does look fuzzy. Maybe some of your mothers lady friends can make a big deal over him. Can't hurt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma1976 Posted March 2, 2003 Author Share Posted March 2, 2003 Thank you ginny! I really appreciate your post! That is actually a really good idea! I do not know if any of you saw on Entertainment Tongiht last week the story about the kid from the show 7th heaven and his battle with Hodgkins. he was very funny cause he said how people didn't know what to say and would say Hey you look really good and he would said...dude i have no eyebrows. haha it was so funny the way he said it and the way it must be a little awkward for people who do not know how to react. haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gail Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 I had chemo with my second breast cancer. My hair started to fall out when I was in my classroom teaching. I went to tuck a piece away, and it came out in my hand. I walked right out of the room, and went next door to tell my friend. I was devasted and inconsoloble. Someone reminded me that I knew my hair was going to fall out, but that really doesn't make a difference when it happens. I went to the hair dresser's that night and got my head shaved. Then I took an ativan, and life was fine. The initail shock is bad. Then I started looking at the NBA and all their shaved heads. Remind you dad it's the in thing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DaveG Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Karm: As a survivor, who still lives on pain killers, I can empathize with your Dad. It doesn't matter whether one has surgery, chemo, radiation, or a combination. Lung cancer has pain associated with it. I have tried, so many times, to wean myself off the pain killers, but the pain level goes up everytime. I look at it this way, with the pain meds, I can function, without, I cannot. Talk about subs, yesterday, when we were out, I said lets stop for subs. My wife wanted McDonalds. We got to McDonalds and the line was out to the street, so I said lets get the subs. So what do I do, I drive right pass the sub shop . We ended up making tuna salad sandwiches when we got home. If your Dad is in his 50's, it could be the over 50 disease too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandyS Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Gail - How long after did your hair start to grow and how fast did it grow? SandyS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JanetK Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 I Lost every strand of hair on my body and head after my 1st treatment of Chemo. In November my chemo was changed and I was surprised when my hair started to grow back. It is now about an inch long. I would recommend to anyone to shave their head before it starts to come out. My hair was long and I got the "Annie Lennox" cut, but unless you've gone through it.........no one can imagine the feeling of scratching you head and finding a clump of hair in your hand. Bless you All JanetK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Karma, losing one's hair when one is used to having a lot is a trauma. My wife started losing her hair after the first chemo, so she had it shaved. Even that was tough, but it was better than agonizing over every strand over a period of time. She wears turbans and a wig outside but doesn't wear anything inside the house. I am glad she is comfortable with that, and I have gotten used to it. Actually, her blue eyes seem bigger without the hair! Anyway, it is hard for me to relate because I lost most of my hair with age and I now wear a very short haircut on the rest. I hope your dad can grieve the loss and move on. After all, his will come back, and mine won't!!! Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosanne Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Gianni's hair started falling out a month after radiation. We also shaved it. He never wore hats but he started wearing a wool hat all the time even in the house. Eventually he felt comfortable going without. I told him he looks great! This is the same man who got his hair cut 2 times a year whether he needed it or not. And to think we got in many arguments in our 29 years about him getting his hair cut!!!!! Rosanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma1976 Posted March 3, 2003 Author Share Posted March 3, 2003 Thank you all. in the book that sandys was reading and i bought "There's No Place Like Hope - A Guide to Beating Cancer in Mind-Sized Bites" by Vickie Girard. they had a whole section on hair loss that i thought was great! i wish i had the book to quote form BUT it is my mom's Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gail Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Sandy S. I buzzed my hair in late November, and took off my hate in late March. (Chemo was done the last week in january). My hair was very, very short, but it was too hot for a hat. Then, about a month or so after that, it became quite curly for the first time ever. Unfortunately, it did not stay that way. My tip for hair loss--- buy lots of really cool earrings! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna D. Posted March 6, 2003 Share Posted March 6, 2003 14 days after my husbands radiation treatments began his hair started coming out in clumps. We shaved his head and he then began to wear hats, bandanas, and knit caps. I think his favorite hat is the one my mother sent him it had a built in ponytail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma1976 Posted March 7, 2003 Author Share Posted March 7, 2003 haha that is too funny. i am thinking of getting him a kangol hat like the one joey pants (ralphie) from the sopranos wears in real life!! i think he will look cutting edge in cancer hair loss wear! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosanne Posted March 8, 2003 Share Posted March 8, 2003 My husband lost his hair after radiation in November. I shaved it also. He still had some gray stubble. When he had hair he wasn't very gray. This week I noticed he is getting fuzz on his head. It looks like it's on the sides. It should be interesting to see how it grows back. Can't wait to see it!!! Rosanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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