Tam Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Hello board. My husband Jon has nsclc stage 3a. Has had 1 round of chemo(carbo-taxol) and will go for round 2 in 2 days. He isn't handling it well. He has also developed a blood disorder as well, lupus anti-coagulant, which has caused many complications. It has already been a long road of only 2 months and many surgeries and tons of hospital stays. I am not looking forward to this next round of chemo at all. I also have to get back to work at some point before my FMLA runs out. We do not have much family worth relying on, so it is mostly just him and I thru the most of this nightmare. He is only 35 and I am 32. No children thank goodness. Any support and info would mean the world to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David A Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 HI Tam Tam , Welcome to our board. Sorry to hear your husband has this damn disease, I'm a stage III A/B survivor, had the same chemo as your husband but had different side effects, side effects and all I'd do it again. Also had surgery and radiation, none of it is a picinic, but better then the alternative. DavidA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terrie Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Hi Tam Tam- Sorry you need to be here - but I'm sure you will find plenty of support. I hate to hear that your husband is having such a hard time of it. Will keep you both in my prayers as you fight the fight! Terrie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beckyg Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Hi Tam Tam, I haven't had the really hard effects your described in your husband, but i have been in this fight for almost 8 months now and so far nothing has worked to shrink my tumor. Hang in there and keep us posted. Becky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy RN Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Hi Tam Tam, Lots of support and info here. This disease is not one you can go thru by yourself. Come here often. Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hebbie Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Welcome, I too was diagnosed with NSCLC Stage IIIA this past January. It hasn't been a walk in the park, but it was made easier with the support of my fiance. It sounds like you are emotionally supporting your husband -- I'm sure it means the world to him! You can also rely on the wonderful people here to provide support and help you along in this journey. Take care, Heather Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna G Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 I am sorry to hear that you and your husband are having to go through this , so young , and with no real family support. Stealing a saying from raising children " it takes a village to over come this disease". You can not do it alone. I am so glad that you have come here for here you will find your supportive family. Please now that you have introduced yourself feel free to share with us more details- how you are coping, any problems you are having with side effects, etc. Are you searching for help perhaps in your church family? When I had chemo one day a week they had to pre medicate me therefore I could not drive, my family "church" always had someone at my door to drive me on Mondays and drop my off, then my husband , not missing work, could pick me up after he got off. It worked out and I think saved my husband some of the stress. Keep in touch. Donna G Again Welcome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Hi, Tam Tam, and welcome to the board. Sorry your husband and yourself have to go through all this, especially at so young an age. Do you have any friends who can help you through this emotionally, and even to help out? It is good to develop a network support system, or you both will wear out fast. Keep connected here as there is much support and info. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norme Posted September 11, 2003 Share Posted September 11, 2003 Hi Tam Tam, So sorry you have to be here but it is a great place with lots of support and information. My husband is Stage IV and for awhile I thought we would never get through the ups and downs but we did, in fact, today 9/11 he had his surgery and had the left lung removed. After much chemo and radiation he is still with me, but it has as I said, been long and very very hard. Hang in there with him. Maybe some of your church members or some close friends could help you to sit a little with him while you return to work. One has to work to pay the bills also. It is really a hard way right now. what about his mother or father, could they help out. Will be praying for his next treatment to be a success and that he can take it without problems....God Bless Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tam Posted September 16, 2003 Author Share Posted September 16, 2003 Hello everyone. I was well surprised at all of the words of support from you all. My husband just took his second round of chemo this past Friday and was handeling it fairly well untill today. It has caught up to him and he has thrown up so much already this morning. He is so weak and tired, which is hard to watch. He is 6ft. 8in. tall and used to going all the time. To answer a few questions about our entire situation: My huisbands feet began to rot several months back. Literally he had large open wounds on both feet which made it very painful and to where he was unable to work anymore. He began having what appeared to be severe chest pain, which many specialists chalked up to severe nicotine withdrawal. In any case, I took him to a larger hospital and they thought the wounds on his feet were maybe causing blood clots to go to his lungs, so they did several cat scans and accidentally found his cancer. After his first surgery to remove the rt. upper lobe of his lung, he developed a very extensive clot from his knee to his naval. After they removed the clot, which took 3 days in ICU, he formed another clot in the same area. Then they figured out the blood disorder and it took 2 more weeks before they found a med that would keep him from clotting. They placed a Vena Cava Filter in and then had to drain fluid off his lung. And now we are at the chemo stage. As for friends and family helping out: In the beginning everyone who new us were here all the time. We could not rest because of them all. They helped clean the house, gathered money, called, visited, brought groceries. That lasted about 3 weeks. Now there are only maybe 4 people that still check on us and offer any help. But, when you tell them what we need done, they balk and slowly stop coming around or calling. And what makes it harder for me right now, is that my husband doesn't want anyone but me to look after him. He knows I really need to get back to work, he knows it has been hard on me and that working would actually give me a break, but I am the only one he can seriously count on. So, taking care of him physically and emotionally is my number one priority right now. If that means we lose our house and so forth then we will manage in other ways. His disease and health problems have shown me that material things don't matter. Which was a hard lessen to learn for me because I love my material possesions. But I have learned that there are far worse things in life than "things". Well, thank you all for listening to me vent my frustrations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted September 16, 2003 Share Posted September 16, 2003 Tam, be careful that your husband doesn't get dehydrated, what with the throwing up. Be sure he gets enough liquids down. Sorry it is so rough on you both. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbaraL Posted September 16, 2003 Share Posted September 16, 2003 Tam Tam, So glad you've joined our group -- but so sorry for the reason. Has your husband applied for any kind of disability insurance payments? Some companies offer it as a standard benefit, and many states have it as well (I don't know about Missouri). You also might call Social Security (visit http://www.ssa.gov to get their phone number). I was pleasantly surprised by the nice woman I spoke with when I called. Just make sure you have your husband's SS# handy. Also, call your medical insurance company and find out whether they cover any kind of home health aid. You might also try navigating the local or state social services agencies to see if you qualify for some help through them. Even food stamps might be available, depending on your situation. Fighting this dreaded disease is tough enough, without worrying about finances too. You two are in my thoughts, Barbara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest macjanice Posted September 20, 2003 Share Posted September 20, 2003 Dear Tam Tam, Sorry that you have to be here but glad that this forum exists for all of us. My husband was dx stage IIIa on Aug. 18. He had surgery to remove the upper right lobe and began chemo Sept. 17. I have the same problem as you. My husband and I do not have any family that lives near. Also, in the beginning many people offered to help but now no one calls or offers. My husband is able to stay home alone while I work but I live close enough to come home at lunch. I miss work often but I try. Also, I am a teacher so I get home by 4 everyday. The reason I tell you this is so that maybe you don't feel so alone. My advise is to rest when your husband is resting and get all the financial help that is available. Come here often and let all the wonderful people here help. We are always available to listen. I have found that this board helps me by reminding me that many people care and understand. Please e-mail me if you want to talk. "The Lord is my strenght" You and your husband are in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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