My childhood arts and crafts and christmas ornaments

[Nick C]

Has anyone had to deal with this stuff?

I'm going through mom's house. Her cedar chest is full of cards and stuff I gave her over the years, she has a whole box of my school stuff upstairs in her attic. I'm sure there is more.

This stuff meant something to her...but was mine. It's wierd to keep but wierd to get rid of.

I can't believe the stuff she kept.

It's sad that the woman who loved me SO much she'd keep every card I ever gave her and every picture I ever drew isn't here.

It's sad that there is truly noone who I mean that much to around anymore. No one could ever love me as much as she did.

Anywho, what do I do with this stuff?

[Tracey Huguley]

I haven't dealt with this but being a mother...I know how much those things mean to me.

Maybe you could gather some of the memorabilia up and make a scrapbook with pictures of you, your mom and family...I'm sure some day when you have kids you can show this to them.

There are even scrapbooking stores that have people that would do it for you....if you're not the creative type...could be therapeutic for you if you did it yourself.

My kids love seeing anything about me (or their family)as a kid, etc...this way your mother and children will be connected through you.

Sorry about your terrible loss... I can't even imagine...

Sending hugs your way....

Love,

Tracey Huguley

[mary colleen]

Nick,

I lost my own mother about 18 months ago. I am just one of 9 kids, so my situation is a little different.

Regardless, we let the house sit for a year because no one could deal with it, and it eventually fell to me to sell it, distribute the furnishings, and dispose somehow of every material item accumulated in 45 years of child rearing and living that had taken place within those walls. It was very, very difficult.

I gave numerous items to Mom's kids and grandkids, gave some things to charity, and threw some things out. In the end,there was about a garage full of items from large to small that I could not find homes for, but that it also seemed somehow wrong to throw out.

For those, I rented a storage unit (I think it is less than $40 a month) and housed everything there for the time being. It's safe, and it delays the need to decide on disposing of certain times right now.

Maybe you can put some of those special items in airtight bins, and put them in storage for now.

You've got a lot on your plate in upcoming months, and there is nothing wrong with storing items for now and going back to them later. Your future children will probably value them someday, even if that is hard for you to foresee right now!

Just a thought, based on my own similar situation.

mc

[Don Wood]

Well, yes, I can relate. I have gone through a lot of Lucie's things and thrown out a lot, but also saved some things. Included in that stuff were things of her mother's which she never went through and tossed. I am keeping my daughter in mind, who is my executor, and throwing out a lot. Cheers. Don

[gail]

Hey, I hope my son grows up to be like you!!!

Since he was an only child, I saved EVERYTHING! Then one day I realized thst someday he would be forced to throw it all out, so I cut back on my savings.

Absolutley put things in a box. I did that with some of my grandmorther's things. Years later I was able to get rid of some things that I couldn't do initially.

gail

[Mskim]

I am going through the same thing. Get a tote and keep it.

It won't take up that much room

[mamasbabygirl]

Nick,

I know that you have said that you want children somday and so for that reason I say keep it too-either in a tote or handing it off to have a scrapbook made.

I am not able to go through my mom's things now, as my SF got rid of everything while my mom was alive-his daughters went through her clothes and everything. I do have all of her ceramics that she painted over the years and they are so special to me. I have found some of the letters I wrote to her and they are priceless to me.

YOu are such a special son and always will be. HUGS

[RandyW]

Get a steamer trunk and fill it with what you want to keep. Donate what ever you can. I am dealing with this with my late wife Nick. I keep photos and sentimental things. Family scrapbooks went to her family. HEr Jewelry is a christmas gift for my younger sister and her daughter. Can't bear to sell or give that away. Get a steamer trunk which will not take up a lot of space.

[sharyn]

Nick,

Yeah its strange to find out something that was so "unimportant" to you, meant the absolute world to your Mom isn't it??? Being a Mom myself, I can soooo relate to your Mom wanting to save the things in life that reminded her of diffent stages in "her boys" life. Honestly, now is not the time to even think about making the decision on what to keep and what to part with.... it is so soon since your Mom passed and with the holidays and all the emotions that come along with them.... you have way too much going on emotionally right now to make a decision like that. If possible, I agree with the others and say "just put the stuff aside for a while" revisit it in 6 months or so... it will be easier then. I also agree with the fact that you might want to save some things to share with your own children someday... I am sure they would LOVE to see their Dad's old drawings and report cards and such...

Love, Sharon

[Nick C]

Thanks everyone.

You all brought up a few points I had never thought of. #1, my kids might actually get a kick one day out of my stuff...my report card, a picture I drew.

And #2 I really should just wait...I don't know what exactly came over me...

ZThanks ya'll. I don't know what I'd do without this place to sound off when sad.

[mary colleen]

Hey Nick - I can identify with your situation because (even though she was much older than your Mom when she left us) my Mom was also just a very special person and much beloved. As I mentioned previously, it took me over a year to even begin to box things up! I had a heck of a time even grasping the concept of having to find other places for her things. As recently as last Friday, I could not bring myself to toss out the now useless key to her former home. I just can't, and it reamins on my key ring.

I found it easiest to work through household items it by dealing with the truly generic and less meaningful items first, and working my way up to the harder items. It helped me when giving things to charity to envision Mom's pleasure at seeing some young family getting use out of her items.

As mentioned, I simply stored what I could not see parting with.

Do not underestimate what your future child or chldren will find delightful to have and look at years from now - try to look at it with their eyes, and it will be easier to decide on things. You can always toss things from storege later if you choose to.

Best of luck with this difficult task - I hope that doing it will help you to heal.

mc

[j's girl]

Nick, the only thing we've really dealt with is Mom's clothes. My Brother's idea was to go through her clothes and pull out anything that "was her". Things she wore often, her favorites, and things she wore for special occassions, and have a quilt made with them. Mom's sister has all of them and will be making a few quilts for us.

You might consider getting a baby quilt made?

Shauna

[Nick C]

That is SO great that you said that about the quilt. A girl I work with mentioned they did that with her Grandfather's shirts. Keri is going to take mom's sewing machine, learn to quilt, and do that with all her "comfy" stuff. Her suits will go to Dress for success...she never liked dressing up for work.

Thanks for the affirmation on the quilt idea. We're running with it.

[Kathleen1]

I LOVE the quilt idea. I had thought of that for my Mom's clothing and fabrics. Another really cool way of keeping things is to make a collage or shadow box.

My husband's father passed away 4 years ago. My husband's brohter made the coolest shadow box I have ever seen. It is a large vintage window and it contains fishing lures, shell boxes, hunting equipment, a jacket, binoculars, keys, duck calls, etc. anything and everything that all belonged to their father. We display it proudly in our living room and remember him and all the things he so loved to do.

In turn, I have some old windows from a family cabin. I am making a shadow box or two for Mom. With her cross stitches, nurses memorabilia from all her years of nursing, pictures, her nurses badge, name plate, diploma etc.

i also have many of the things I gave her over the years or old school things of mine that she saved, cards etc. I have a group of those stackable boxes that stack inside of each other. They are decorative and hold many of the things she saved, each box is gradually bigger and it made it easy to organize and still disply nicely.

I'm a packrat like Mom and it is too hard for me to throw anything of hers away. Its a way of hanging on to her. and I agree, your future children will love to see your things from your childhood.

Here is an idea. Why don't you frame a few of your things or make a shadow box for your wife for an extra sentimental gift? I would love something like that from my husband!

I found a drawing of my brothers that mom had saved. I wrapped it up and gave it to my brother's wife. She treasures it.

Good luck and I agree, don't get rid of anything too soon. Give yourself time.

k