missyk Posted May 13, 2007 Share Posted May 13, 2007 May 13th used to be such a special day in our lives. It was on that day in 1986 that our family became "officially" complete when Mom married our step-father, Ralph. I was 11 years old and I think as much in love with him as Mom was...he quickly became my "daddy" to the point where we joke that I must really *be* his daughter, we're so much alike. Today we celebrate 21 years of Ralph's being our "dad" and Mom's husband, through the ups and downs of everyday life. May 13th...a day that stopped us in our tracks in 2005. Mom and Ralph celebrated their 19th wedding anniversary in the hospital after recieving the results of the lung biopsy earlier in the day. It was cancer and our lives would never be the same. Two years later and we're thankful for the time we've had and, honestly, sometimes pi**ed off that we've had to *be* thankful...especially as the time grows shorter and shorter. May 13th, 2007...Mother's Day, also. It seems like it all just piles on, doesn't it? It's a rough day here with many thoughts and much sadness slinking it's way over what SHOULD be a happy day. I'm sad when I really don't want to be...and having a hard time enjoying "my day". I just kind of want it to be over. No celebrations here, just a card from my daughter she made at school, and move on with the day like any other. I know I should be happy today...Mom's still here to celebrate all the GOOD things with...but I'm finding it terribly hard to even bother to get something to eat, let alone paste a smile on my face and drive up there to come face-to-face with my sister and her significant other who are still grating on me, even from a distance...or to sit around and pretend that there will be another Mother's Day, another wedding anniversary. The tears come too easily today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamataca Posted May 13, 2007 Share Posted May 13, 2007 Missy, Your words cut into my heart. I'm in a reatively similiar position...we just joined hospice, and for the first time I am facing a reality of a life without Mom. So much of the last two years have been consumed with beating cancer (and the 30 before that with Crohn's) that I can't imagine what's next. But I DO have her with me today. That is what I have to focus on. We'll stand around, my brothers, our spouses, and my children, and tell the same old stories we always do in antcipation of the same old laughs. I'm just probably in more denial than you are. Certainly not implying that this is a better thing. I pray for some peace for you today. Kelly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillise Posted May 13, 2007 Share Posted May 13, 2007 Missy and Kelly, I'm thinking about you both today. I'm praying you have the strength to be both the daughters and the mothers you need to be today. Susan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted May 13, 2007 Share Posted May 13, 2007 (((((Missy))))) Wanting the day over over here too. I hurt with you my friend, and I am so sorry that this day which should be SO special is so hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrea Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 No words, just hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geri Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 No words here either, just know you're understood. Geri Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 In my own way I can hear you. I understand and hope the sun comes out tomorrow. take care of your self. Prayers andf Hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daddyslittlegirl Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 Missy, I'm so sorry that this has been a tough day for you. I pray that there will be brighter days in your near future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laban Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 Missy, I too am sorry it was a difficult day. Today also is our wedding anniversary, as well as Bill's 60 birthday (he said getting married on his birthday would assure him of not forgetting our anniversary.) We pray we'll do this again next year. Blessings to you and your family for strength. Laurie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wendykay Posted May 27, 2007 Share Posted May 27, 2007 Right now life really sucks.... you are not alone we are not alone. why does life have to be so unfair? may the lord soothe your soul and and comfort you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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