deb10653 Posted April 15, 2008 Share Posted April 15, 2008 I ended up taking Dave to the hospital Saturday night, running a fever and I knew he was dehydrated, the no eating was not improving. His potassium was super low, had an infection and was just plain miserable. So it is now Tuesday, his blood count is up and his potassium is normal, the infection is still a mystery and they keep trying to figure it out, it is in his blood and they think colon/bladder related but when you don't intake there is no output to check!!! His mouth had the start of "thrush"??? and is sore but healing, the appetite is still gone and slowly he is realizing he HAS to eat but it is a real serious struggle right now. I just am so scared, he looks so beaten at the moment. His daughter is here from California and that has helped a little but you can not make someone eat...he is staying hydrated much better and did eat almost half a sandwich at lunch...just praying he starts being that fighter I saw a week ago...so quickly he aged, lost a lot of weight and just wasn't the Dave I know. Emotionally I am a wreck, full of guilt for not being a better caretaker, guilty when I leave the hospital, cried daily to exhaustion but somehow I know this is a day to day struggle and I am not willing to give up this soon and he SAYS he isn't either...so many people praying for him I just do not want it so end this quickly. Sorry for this but I really needed somewhere to be able to unload...am only home for a minute to pay bills and do the HAVE TOS but stopped in to UNLOAD...thank you Deb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peebygeeby Posted April 15, 2008 Share Posted April 15, 2008 Hi Deb, I'm sorry things are going so rough for you. I hope that Dave is getting some strength back, and will start to do better with this. Don't beat yourself up. I'm sure you're doing all that is humanly possible to help Dave through this. Sometimes we can never do enough because it is simply out of our hands. Try to stay positive, and relax a little if you can. Dave's welfare depends on your welfare. My thoughts are with you and I'm wishing you all the best. Gail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patti B Posted April 15, 2008 Share Posted April 15, 2008 Deb- I am so sorry that Dave is having a rough time right now. The hospital is probably the best place for him, tho. Please don't feel guilty at all - you are doing everything you can, loving him, caring for him, and being there for him. The love and affection you give him means more to him than anything. I know this to be true - I am a cancer survivor and knowing that my family loves me means more to me than anything they could physically do for me!!! You getting sick and run down won't help him at all so please remember to be good to yourself. Hoping things turn around very soon for Dave. He is a lucky man to have you by his side. Hugs - Patti B Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandraL Posted April 16, 2008 Share Posted April 16, 2008 Hi Deb. This is the place to UNLOAD. You are going through an extremely stressful time and you are doing all the right things. Keep up your fighting spirits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leslie Posted April 16, 2008 Share Posted April 16, 2008 Oh Deb, I am sorry things are so hard right now. One of things that helped me when I was taking care of my dad and feeling exhausted--was one of the first rules of first aid: You have to make sure that you are safe first or else you are not able to take care of anyone else. You cannot feel guilty--you are doing an amazing job and you HAVE to take breaks if you want to have strength to take care of your husband. I am sending you strength. Best, Leslie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deb10653 Posted April 16, 2008 Author Share Posted April 16, 2008 Thanks everyone, it appears that Dave will probably be released tomorrow, not sure if Medicare is the reason or not but suspect since he has not potassium/white count/infection reason to stay now they are having to release him. He is starting to eat a wee bit better... like three spoons of pudding or cereal/quarter of a tuna sandwich whatever, much better than previous. I am a bit scared of physcially being able to help with everything, his bone tumor that started all of his has basically made him now left-handed and there are many things you really need your right shoulder and arm for...we will work it out and I'm not afraid to ask for help anymore. I have done enough nagging about this food issue that he is now MAD...we will see what happens. Thank you for being here... I have been going nuts, we have learned a lot and hopefully the chemo schedule will continue and our lessons will be put to good use. His pain meds are less than half of what they were before the chemo so am hopeful...now I want to see that fighter return and get on with living life. Will keep you updated. Deb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillise Posted April 16, 2008 Share Posted April 16, 2008 Deb--Don't apologize for the need to unload. every care giver has to and this is an excellent place for it. Unload here anytime you need to--we all understand. Susan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deb10653 Posted April 19, 2008 Author Share Posted April 19, 2008 Just an update, Dave is home and is still very weak but is eating more each day and slowly getting his strength back, he knows to continue chemo he has to be a lot stronger. The infection was E.Coli but who knows the source? He is on oral potassium now and antibiotic for a week, get general blood work on Monday and see oncologist about chemo schedule on Thursday, will check blood counts etc., The dr said delaying the chemo would not change if it works or not and that he might "lower" the dosage a bit, he wasn't sure and we will discuss it. It is just nice to have him home and although at the moment I am having to help with a lot of things I hope as each day goes by he is more independent again. They lowered the pain meds drastically while in the hospital and he got along fine, now we are home and he is more active and the shoulder bone met is causing more discomfort so have increased the breakthrough meds only...hopefully that will be enough. Thank you for "listening" to me... Deb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
recce101 Posted April 19, 2008 Share Posted April 19, 2008 Hi, Deb, it's good to hear things are looking up a bit. Best to you both. Aloha, Ned Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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