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Terrible Two's


ursol

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My baby girl (two and a half) is getting worse by the day. I cannot seem to control her at all. Neither can my mother. She also has figured out that mom is sick and cannot run fast or go up the stairs, so she takes advantage of that. I continously find her with mascara on her face, and lipstick all over her mouth, writings on my walls or desks, temper tantrums all the time when she does not get her way.

Please tell me this gets better.

Happy Fathers day to all the Dad's on the site.

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I remember just like it was yesterday how both my kids were at that age - it was almost as if I tucked these precious little ones into bed one night and the next day they were monsters. It wasn't actually that quick a process - that is just how it seemed to me. By the same token the process wasn't reversed immediately either, but when they changed back to their sweet selves a peace came over the household.

I was healthy when that happened to me though and I can't imagine how draining it must be when you aren't in top form.

So, yes, it does end - you just need to hold on to your sanity until that day arrives. Take care.

Linda

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My granddaughter Jayla just turned 2 on 6/11 and I don't know that we have hit the extreme terrible 2's yet but I think she is working her way up there. She is basically a good kid. She takes real good care of her Bampa. I have custody of her and when she goes to visit her mother on the weekends it takes a day or two to "DEBUG" her so to say. I seem to be the only one able to control her behavior. It does seem that she can run a little faster everyday though.

Hang in there. It does get better.

Denise

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I can't imagine taking care of my daughter (4 now) and battling cancer at the same time. You might consider a summer mother's day out at a local church or a daycare part-time to give yourself a break or you may just lose it yourself! It does get better....but each child is different and exactly how long it will be before she "gets better" will vary.

My son never really had the terrible twos...now, at age 10, he thinks he knows everything and we are having a phase now where he talks back and tries to correct everything I say or do...I call it the terrible tens!!!

My daughter started her terrible twos at 18months!!! and is STILL in a "terrible two" phase today at age 4....only now, she's smarter and better at it!! I call it the "sneaky wise a@@" phase....HA!

SHe has poured pitchers of water on the kitchen floor to "ice skate", put salt and pepper (bottles of it) in the dog food bowl many times, gotten into my make up, cut off a chunck of her hair, kicked her brother every chance she gets when no one is looking, takes things and hides them under her bed or her pillow, stuck food and drinks in nooks and crannies of the house, drawn on everything, painted on everything, cut up everything, sneaks around at night and watches cartoons or plays her handheld game, took my wedding ring and stuck it underneath my office desk (I didn't find it for a month) emtpied a whole bottle of childrens tylenol for us to find and had us so scared we took her to the ER and after 6 hours of IVs and tests it was found she hadn't taken ANY at all.....this is my short list.... AND I AM HERE and healthy and watching her all day and she can do all this in a split second.......Our house is baby proofed and like fort knoxs and if there is a way- she will find it....I've almost lost my mind at times.

My daughter (as I am sure is yours) is beautiful and sweet and smart....but she is an expert at getting into everything and pushing every button I have....at times I think she is "doing" this to me and take it personally...but she isn't .....she doesn't know...she's testing her limits and her skills and mommys are the easy target...she's just smart and thinks she can do big people things (and get away with it) She doesn't do this to other people (teachers, out in public, etc...she's an angel)

What works for me I have found is positive reinforcements (spanking, threatening, yelling or bribing, etc... doesn't work on her) so reinforcing the positive things she does and giving ALOT of attention to the positive things she does works really well. Time outs and taking away toys and fun when she does wrong (but no long "talk" or alot of attention given to the bad behavior. ) I tell her that what she did was ugly or not a good thing to do and tell her what her punishment is and enforce it. We try to only give attention and time to good behaviors.

Also, I cut out ALL sugar and even cut off juice drinks with sugar...we drink flavored water now and no sweets at all...alot of protein and alot of scheduled play....

She gets in more trouble when she's not eaten or slept poorly and/or when she is bored.

So to keep her in "check" as I call it, we have a routine at bed and she goes to bed every night at the same time no matter what (which is why you hardly see me on chat night)

breakfast is full protein and we have a scheduled day.

It's still a battle of wills sometimes, but it's getting better as she gets older.

You really need some help or a break as often as you can. I think she may be taking advantage of your health to explore and express herself in whatever ways she can get her hands into! That's how they learn....but it drives us nuts.

Check into the mother's day out programs- they are rather reasonable (at least here) and teach them to interact with others and whats acceptable and what is not....maybe that will help, or at least give you and your mom a break!

Good luck and keep us posted.

(((hugs)))

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I think Katie had a clone of my daughter! :lol:

Your daughter is definitely taking advantage of your weakness. That's what they do! :(

The good news is that the better they are at it, the brighter they are so at least you know you're raising a genius! :D

Most of us who have gone through this have not done so while battling cancer and we still almost went NUTS! :?

I echo strongly the advice to get part time day care, play group, etc. for her. You can't take care of either of you if you don't first take care of yourself.

Carole

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Lilly,

Thanks for the smile. Boy did you hit Katie's button! That is the most I have seen here write in one posting.

I wasn't sure I was going to survive my daughter either. She is going to be five in a couple of weeks and her behavior has improved significantly. We used to battle over snacks (me saying no...dinner is in ten minutes) and shopping used to be bad when I would tell her no (we left halfway through the weekly shopping a couple of times and then sat in the car for 15 minutes while she had a meltdown...couldn't get her into the carseat). My daughter is an absolute delight now and so loving.

It does get better.

If you can get a friend or family member to take her for a few hours on the weekend so you can rest, I recommend you do it.

Hang in there.

Mendy

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