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It's been so long since I've been here. So long. I don't know if you guys remember me (Katie, Nick, Val et al) but I started her in 2006 when my mom was sick with SCLC, and ended up in the grieving section with all of you. Nick came on not long after.

I'm in awe that so many of the same people are still here, giving sympathy and support every day to those seeking it. You guys are really something special.

I ended up here again because I saw a report on lung cancer while I was online - when I clicked on it there you were, Nick! I recognized you right away, it's was so strange to see you "live". Then they flashed that picture of you and your beautiful mom and it was like going back in time. I was also amazed at how big Lungevity has gotten since I started posting here. Amazing.

I hope this post finds everyone healthy and living their "new normal" with some happiness and joy. You guys always understood more than anyone what it means to lose someone you love to this disease. The process you go through, the ups and downs. And it IS a process. I think I read on here at some point "You can't go around grief, you have to go through it." As badly as I wanted to go around it...but truer words were never spoken.

I just wanted to jump in and say hello to all of you, so dear to me and who helped me through the worst time in my life. And five years later, I still cry. I cried listening to "Rudolph" on the radio the other day - my mom loved Christmas and that album by Gene Autry. She played it for us from Thanksgiving on... My baby that was born right after she passed away (in my Avatar) just turned five years old. He's the same age my oldest one was when we lost their beloved Nana. I don't know where the time has gone.

I was so sad to read about ConnieB - I couldn't believe it. What a special lady she was. I have some catching up to do...

Again, just wanted to say hello and thank all of you for being there when I needed you. (Uh-oh, I'm crying just writing this!) This is an amazing little community....

PS - My posts were under MomsGirl or Mom's Girl - posted under both.

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Hey Randy, who are you calling old?

Of course I remember you. I am still in awe that 5 years have passed. But they have. I do still shed tears.

Charlie Brown Christmas CD is the one that will make me break down...so I get that whole thing.

We've had a few folks come back the last few days and say hello. I think these mini reunions are special too. I think it shows folks who are earlier in their journey that there is life (different life) after loss. And that our loved ones remain as special as they ever were to us.

As an update, 5 years ago we had no kids. Today we have a 3 1/2 year old and a 9 month old. Life is wonderful, even though we are missing our Grammy.

Stay well and please check in again. And when you are haing a bad day, we're here.

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