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michellep

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Posts posted by michellep

    I wanna wake up please?

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    I get so sad and the tears just keep coming. I feel like I'm having a nightmare I need to just wake up, please?

    I'm trying to do things to distract myself honestly....but it doesn't last very long and then the tears are back. I even went to lunch yesterday with some neighbors but all I could think about was coming home and being alone.

    This morning I went to get finger printed and fill out the paperwork for a back round check for a job and sat in the car and cried. Then I had a doctors appt and while driving there I drove past the chemo doctor's office....more tears. Then while going to the doctor I had to drive past the hospital where my husband had been admitted six times in the nine month battle we had.

    The doctor ended up doubling the dose of medication and even said I could have the meds from his office for free since my insurance company won't pay. Of course for 20+ years they took premium payments, right?

    I did however go get food for a Thanksgiving dinner because I told our son that we are going to celebrate Don's life that day....I just hope I can get through it.

    I quit wearing makeup....it does no good.

    Monday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    Good morning everyone. I've of course been up since 2am "again" ughhhh But I have a busy day today. Going to get finger printed for a job, then off to the doctor for another bottle of magic pills! Then...I've decided to cook Thanksgiving dinner so I best go get a turkey. It will just be my son and myself, but Thanksgiving was always my husbands favorite holiday. We're going to consider it a "Celebration of Life" day for him.

    Weather here is cold this morning 35 degrees but it should warm up I hope.

    Have a good day everyone ! :)

    Sunday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    Hello :) It's been a few days since I've posted. BUT I have good news to report. I actually went out to lunch today with friends! I can't say it was easy, but baby steps right? Maybe these meds are starting to help me. I have a Dr. appt tomorrow and am going to ask for another bottle! ha ha

    Weather here today was nice. Not too cold but the sun was shining which was nice. I got a new lock put on my bedroom door, I don't know if you remember but my son had left the front door unlocked all night last week and I have been terrified ever since. But...I'll be safe tonight which means no all night face book cafe and it will give Ann a chance to get ahead of me again.

    Tomorrow is my finger printing for a job I applied for. Wish me luck!

    Please....not another one

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    I have a very dear friend who's 35 yr old daughter has been in the hospital with pneumonia for a week. Apparently they ran a ct scan and found a mass. Now they are going to schedule a biopsy. They say they suspect it's cancer. She is a non smoker who has an 11 yr old daughter.

    I'm devastated beyond words. It's only been a month since I lost my husband and now another one so close.....I just hate this monster disease.

    I'm going to do my best to be there for all of them but this is just so HARD!

    Tomorrow

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    That was a beautiful story. Just one of many memories you have of your Johnny. I too have those about Donald and myself, it's just hard right now for me to think of all the good times. For some reason my mind continues to flash back to the illness which is something I do not want to think about.

    Cancer can take them away from us till we meet again but it can never take the love away.

    Tuesday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    I know.....I know......I should be sleeping at 2am instead of posting the air this morning. My hours these days are just crazy.

    Don't know what the weather is like cuz it's dark outside LOL But it will most likely be cold again.

    I actually left the house yesterday! Not for long though just to the grocery store and back, but at least it was OUTSIDE! For dinner I had chocolate covered almonds. :-o

    Well, hope everyone is okay and I'm headed to FB now. I think Ann and I are competing and I can't let her catch up ya know?

    Lily....no, that wasn't me that called last night although I should have. I could have used someone to chat with. Maybe I'll call tonight if I'm awake.

    Monday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    Well, since I'm the first one up today (since 2am) I thought I would start Monday's Air. I don't know about the weather because it's still dark outside but I do know it's cold!

    I had plans today to venture out but I know I'll be dragging my behind due to lack of sleep. Maybe a nice cold shower? naaaaaaaa

    I hope everyone had a nice week end. Mine was quiet. Just played on FB Cafe. I'm so addicted to that game and it's all Ann's fault! LOL But it keeps my mind on other things, so that's good right?

    I know Randy has a job interview today. So let's all cheer him on ok?

    Judy, I'm hoping your daughter is doing well and I look forward to hearing some good news soon.

    Lily, I know you're having a hard time right now, but your in my thoughts and prayers everyday. I'll be calling you soon.

    Well, back to my cafe now to cook some more. No cooking at home tonight....maybe I'll order a pizza :)

    memories and love

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    That was the most beautiful thing I have ever read in my life. Thank you for sharing this with us and please take care of yourself. I wish we lived closer so I could give you a big hug my friend.

    I too as the holidays are just coming don't know what I'm going to do with myself. I told my son that I thought we should make a Thanksgiving dinner together and have a "celebration of life" in Don's memory. I just don't know if I can do it.......we'll see.

    Hugs and prayers to you Lily!

    Let's start a memory thread

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    That was just beautiful and thank you for sharing. I wish we had more memory posters on this thread because I feel like it helps reading about others and their loving memories.

    I hope that you can somehow convince his niece to at least just "copy" the video and send it to you. Please keep trying.

    My thoughts are with all of us who have lost a loved one during this holiday season. With the help of each other, we'll get thru it.

    So....keep posting those beautiful memories!

    Let's start a memory thread

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    I just found something today that made me smile and feel so very proud of my husband and I wanted to share it with you. As some of you know he worked for JPL/NASA for 42 years. I found a certificate award to him from Washington D.C. and reads as follows:

    The National Aeronautics and Space Administration presents the

    APOLLO ACHIEVEMENT AWARD to Donald P*******.

    In appreciation of dedicated service to the nation as a member of the team which has advanced the nation's capabilities in aeronautics and space and demonstrated them in many outstanding accomplishments culminating in Apollo II"s successful achievement of man's first landing on the moon, July 20, 1969

    Signed in Washington D.C. by J. Paine Administrator NASA

    I'm sooooooooooooo proud!

    Thursday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    "Annette"]It is cool and VERY rainy here in Richmond. I have been noticing that I am not the only one addicted to FB games. I could use neighbors on Cafe Town, Farmville and Farm Town if anyone is interested give me a shout.

    Annette

    ADD ME!!!!!!!!!!

    Thursday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    Now you KNOW there was a reason I wanted you to take a couple days off the FB cafe.....so I could jump ahead of you! LOL I've been busting my butt to beat ya these past days and I finally did it!

    I used to cook meals for the VFW for many years. Seemed like I was always in their kitchen. But I finally had "enough" of all the politics that come along from some of the members. It seems that auxiliary ladies seem to forget what our purpose is.......to serve the vets and community. Sometimes I missed it, but I always had my family to cook for right?

    Good luck with that cake...you should take a pic and post it for us :wink:

    Thursday's Air

    in JUST FOR FUN

    Posted

    I've been looking for Judy or someone to start today's Air thread and no one was here so I decided to do it. Hope it's okay?

    My day started as usual in the wee hours of the morning. Gotta find a way to get some more regular hours.

    The weather here today looks cold and cloudy. Where I live it seems we only have two seasons. It's either freezing cold winter or very hot summers. Spring and fall might peek in for a couple days and that makes it hard cuz I have to run around the house like crazy washing outside windows "quickly".

    Today I'm just doing the usual. Playing FB. It's helps keep my mind elsewhere. But I feel like cooking dinner for my son tonight. We'll see...his eating habits are nasty usually....cheeseburgers and fries. NOT for me!

    Have a good day everyone!

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