DianeR

Thanks for sharing Lily. It is beautiful and I like to believe those words. Diane

Yes I have. When my girls were little we would go out in the rain and dance in the puddles! It was great fun. (Thank goodness we live on over 3 acres and not too many neighbors saw us!) Diane

I hope this helps some of you. I read this to remind myself this is how my dear dad would want me to live my life. "Remembrance You can shed tears that he is gone, or you can smile because he has lived. You can close your eyes and pray that he'll come back, or you can open your eyes and see all he has left. Your heart can be empty because you can't see him, or you can be full of the love you shared. You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday. You can remember him and only that he's gone, or you can cherish his memory and let it live on. You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back, or you can do what he'd want: Smile, Open Your Eyes, Love and Go On. Author Unknown" My wish is that we can all find some peace in this journey and are able to "Smile, Open our Eyes, Love and Go On". Diane

My heart goes out to you and Keri. I know all to well how the memories come crashing in on the anniversary dates. I understand completely what you meant when you wrote: "With the chill in the air. The leaves starting to turn. The crickets at night. The birds in the morning. The very blue skies this time of year brings. And rememberances of my last days with Mom" My dad passed away Sept. 19, 2004, and not only the date brings memories, but also the change of the seasons. I always think of the song "Wake me up when September Ends". My thoughts are with you during the upcoming days. Take Care, Diane

I have to agree with everyone else here. I saw Flowergirlie's post this morning and was amazed by her strength and kindness. It is people like her that make this board so special! She is truly a treasure to this message board. Flowergirlie, my thoughts are with you and your family. Take care. Diane

Val, You make perfect sense to me. I am definitely not the person I was the day before daddy was dx. I think trying to protect myself from all the hurt and pain of watching my dad go through this horrible journey and then losing him, I lost myself. It has almost been 2 1/2 years now since dad died and I am still working on finding out who I am now. If I keep going I will really begin to ramble, but I did want you to know I understand how you feel. I am at that same place trying to figure out the new me and how to be happy and comfortable with myself once again. Val, I hope you are able to get through the family changes and soon are able to say you feel comfortable in your new life. I always love to read your posts because I can relate to many of them. Take care. Diane

Stephanie, I am just so very sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with your family. Diane

Nick, I too know what you mean. I would love to say "dad" and hear his voice answer me. I have a phone message he left me that I put on my tape recorder. Every once in a while I play that message just to hear his voice talking to me. Oh how I miss my dad! Nick, I agree with the others that your mom was very lucky to have such a loving and caring son. It shows how much you cared in every message you write. Take care and I hope with time the pain lessens for all of us. Diane

Grace, I am so very sorry for your loss. Carlton was such a fighter and he is now at peace. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Diane

Nancy, I understand the pain you are having with the sale of your dad's house. It does hurt. A year after my dad died my mom had to sell the house because it was just too much house for her to keep up. My parent's lived in their house for 55 years. This was HOME. It was the only home I had lived in before I got married. I thought we would have it forever . My dad was a builder so he had built on to this house. We had the most beautiful stone fireplace in the family room. This house was truely daddy's house and we loved it. I took videos and pictures of our house before mom moved out, but I have been unable to watch or look at them. It is just too painful to know it is not ours anymore. Nancy I do understand and I agree with you "it will always be dad's house". Diane

Frank, I want you to know how much I admire your strength and courage in your fight against this BEAST! I have always read your posts and was so impressed with your attitude for your fight and your compassion to others. Your sense of humor is wonderful and always brought smiles and laughs at times I didn't think I could smile or laugh anymore. I am so glad you have Connie and a wonderful loving family. I am also glad to hear you have found a good hospice team. I pray they get your pain meds under contol and you are once again comfortable. I along with everyone else can't wait to read the next 51 weeks of your entries in this jounal! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Take Care, Diane

Tina, So happy to hear the goood news! Diane

Val, I also watch Grey's. I totally agree with you...those quotes say it all. It has been over 2 years since my dad passed away. I am still trying to figure out how to exist in this world when my dad doesn't. So I guess when she says "that doesn't ever really change"...well, like you said, it says it all! Diane

Lorrie, This is GREAT news. I am so happy that life is good!!! Diane

Thanks Don. The chorus is beautiful and so true. Our loved ones are always with us...just in different ways now. Diane