Realizing There is No Controlling emotions

[eppie]

At least not these days. Here;s what happened today:

I was coming home from the gym and I saw a car parked strangely by my neighbor's house. I saw my nieghbor's child ( age 12) crying and a stranger carrying a bloody orange cat. I parked in their drive way and howled with the child....My first thought was that it was my beloved orange cat, Jack. I was sobbing and petting it and the child was saying it was not Jack but her cat, Al Sabador. Since it was still alive but banged up so horribly I asked the child to get me a box and a towel.....I wanted to take it to the vet hospital up the road. I did but when i got there the place was closed and the cat was dead. Her parents were't home from work so I really didn;t want her to watch this cat die and I couldn;t stay there and watch it with her given how upset I was.

I feel bad being out of control I was in front of a child. As a teacher I sort of pride myself in being able to be "present" in front of children. The cat's face was so badly injured I really couldn't tell if it was her cat or mine. My cat is her cat's father and has similar markings. I wasn;t really processing very well. So it was a good thing that I got away from the scene. It gave me a chance to get composure. By the time I got back to our houses, her dad was home and could take the body.

Sadly this is the second cat in a week to die at this very same spot. My neighbors and I are going to have to petition the town for some caution signs urging cars to slow down "Children at Play" or even better a speed bump since we are at the entrance to the neighborhood off a fairly busy street.

I am ok now...i freaked out my hubs calling from the cell phone demanding to know where Jack the cat was right now. I am going over to the neighbors' house tomorrow after school to see if they are ok. The emotion was like a storm...a tornado. Luckily, i am intact. Poor kitty.

Sadly,

Eppie

[Don M]

Sheeesh Eppie...how awful. I am glad you are ok now.

Yah poor kitty. My cats bring me a lot of comfort.

Don M

[Maryanne]

Hi Eppie,

How you are you honey, I pray you are coping...

I am so relieved this was not your cat. You really would not need that on top of the passing of your beloved dad. I could just imagine the stress you went through thinking that was your kitty.

Just want you to know that I am thinking of you.

Maryanne

[dadstimeon]

Eppie--Just want you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Rich

[Patty]

Oh, (((Eppie)))...don't be so hard on yourself. What you did for your neighbor was wonderful. Yes, a speed bump would be good. Take Care, Patty

[cindi o'h]

Oh, honey,

If it were me, I would have lost it too. I have no control over whether or not I cry. I never mastered that one.

Poor kitty. Poor little girl. Poor little girl's dad. Poor Eppie. And poor Mr. Eppie.

How about some ice cream with sprinkles? I got a boxa kleenex...

love,

Cindi o'h

[hopeandstrength]

You know, I think you are a good teacher because you are able to express your emotions. I'm sorry about the cat.

Take care,

Cathy

[Linda661]

I am so sorry for your rough day and kitty, Eppie. We do "lose it" when we care, and that's just plain OK. We care.....that's what matters.

Linda

[Dreamweaver]

Eppy {{{{{{{{{{{{{ hugs }}}}}}}}}}}}

It is so hard when our emotions are right on edge. I find that when I try to stay in control, then later on the littlest of things will set my emotions off. Am so sorry you had to see the poor kitty - but then again, am so glad the little girl had you there. Not only to take the kitty away, but also to see that it was Ok to cry, and that even adults need that release.

Hold on tight to the many wonderful memories you have of your father. and don't be so hard on yourself sweetie, you are only human after all. *smile*

Love,

Melanie