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Wow that is what I said every few miles yesterday as I made the last leg of my journy home. I had a wonderful time with my family and I really do miss them but I am so glad to be home.

My home is here and I am in awe of the beauty that surrounds me all of the time. I wish there was a way that I could have my family and the life I have made for myself here. That is impossible so for now I will enjoy all that surrounds me and the life I have worked so hard to make for myself. Someday I know that I will have to move to be near my kids but for now I am at peace here.

Today would have been my 46th aniversary had my husband and I stayed married. That doesn't seem possible yet so much in my life doesn't seem possible like my son being a grandpa! I grieve for Denis especially when I am with my family. I know how much they miss him and I do have a lot of good memories. My grief for him does not equal the grief I still have over losing my Johnny.

Anyway life goes on. I have so many things that I want to do, things I have not done in a long time. Quilts,crochet and cross stitch and my new love painting. My job will take up part of my time but I won't work those long stretches like I did last year. I want to spend time with my friends and work in my yard and do some family tree research. I have so much I have let go that now I want to do again.

I hope all of you are doing well. I know that pain that always lurks around all of us. I pray that this will be the year to find a cure and no one else will know that fear and pain. Happy New Year and God Bless all of you.Lillian

PS I have baby pictures but don't know how to post them. Rick can you help me out? I have a new picture of myself for my avitar as well. I'm pretty dumb when it comes to things like that.

-----> UPDATED from Katie- Lillian's pictures:







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Thanks to all of you for welcoming me back. I really did enjoy my trip but there is no place like home :!:

The pictures are top to bottom. My daughter in law Angela (new grandma) my granddaughter Emily (New Aunt)Myself with Caroline, Jack my granddaughter's husband holding his daughter and the last one is my son David holding his first grandchild. Caroline is adorable. Not many pictures with her mom because everyone else wanted to hold her.

My new Avitar is a 19 inch redfish I caught the day David took me fishing. We also caught about 20 of the big Sheephead (jailbird fish).I was tired and windblown but really enjoyed my fishing trip.

I still have pictures of Johnny in several places in my home but it is time to move forward and show the world what I look like now. Not happy about the 40 extra pounds sense quiting smoking but I am starting to work on that very seriously now.

Well I've got to go. I have some writing to do and several other projects to work on before I go back to work Monday. Thanks again for welcoming me home. Lillian

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