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Need Some Help Plz


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I posted before but we found out my mom had lung cancer in both lungs with brain mets. It has spread thoughout her entire body.

Hospice is here and they say my mom will only last about 3 months.

We accept this and are taking care of my mom.

She said she is not in pain but she cant control her bowels at all she wakes up in middle of night and wont make it to bathroom. We got her some depends it helped a lil. She takes imodium but not helping

anyone have any advice plzzz

its 3:28am and im really scared for her



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First, I am sorry you are traveling down this road... it is not easy, this I know.

My Dad had the same problems with his bowels and urination towards the end of his journey, I attributed it to his chemo, and his doctors had him on HIGH doeses of Imodium which seemed to help very little. Now, upon reading your post, I am wondering if it had anything to do with the chemo at all. Daddy also had a small met on his spine and I have read in various "searches" that spine mets tend to cause incontinence... (can't tell you where I read it as it was a few years ago)... Maybe this is contributing to your Moms problem?

I wish you strength for the remainder of your journey with Mom - it is just so hard. I will pray for you. Love, Sharon

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I'm trying to put myself in your mom's shoes and I would look at it from two points of view. First, I would ask someone to do an internet search of foods that tend to constipate and eat as many as I could. Also, I don't know how steady she is on her feet or if there is a fear on her or your part that she will fall getting up in the night. If so, I would want a supply of depends, medicated wipes and a pail with a tight fitting lid all very close to the bed. It would mean a lot to me if I could clean myself up without having to wake someone or risk falling. Is she capable of doing this?

Judy in Key West

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I am so very sorry for your Mom's situation, and I hope she can get some help to deal with the bowel problem.

My husband recently had terrible urgency and loose stools, which Immodium did absolutely nothing for. After 3 days his MD prescribed Lomotil + atropine sulphate, which cleared it up. Maybe you could ask her doctor about this?

In addition, the BRAT diet is commonly recommended for loose stools ... that's banana, rice, applesauce, and toast. It is supposedly constipating.

Hopefully your Mom may find some relief from one or both of the above.

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Thank you all for support.

My mom and Dr decided for no treatment. My mom watched my dad go though chemo and it was hell

My dad died when he was 46 I was 15

My mother would rather have a few good months than be sick.

She looks fine. Maybe looks tired

but she cant control her bowels and I know that is one of the signs the body is shutting down.

And she is sleeping alot.

She eats good but she is losing weight I just dont know what will happen next.

thank you all


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Hello Lyris,I am very sorry to read of your Mom's cancer and the fact that she is on Hospice. My husband had colon cancer in 1992 and the surgery took out about 2 feet of his large intestine and part of his rectum. He has dealt with bowel problems ever since. We have found that Lomotil 2.5mg along with the BRAT diet works the best along with a pro-biotic, the refrigerated kind you buy at the health food store. We use Healthy Trinity and it works for him.


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Call hospice and talk to the nurse!

My dad had constant diarrhea after having a portion of small intestine removed. The GI doctor tried a bulk-forming agent (Questron, I think). It sounds counterproductive to use fiber, but it actually helps absorb the intestinal liquid.

Lomotil liquid helped better than Immodium. The tablets did nothing for him.

Ask hospice to provide a commode. You cam place it right next to her bed. Not so swell for privacy, but it gets the job done.

You can also get inserts for Depends, if you need the extra absorbancy.

I hope she can get some relief from this. Fecal incontinence is miserable.


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