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My name is Annie and I'm so happy to have found this site. I've been lurking here for a few days.

I'm writing about my mother who has been diagnosed with NSCLC within the last two weeks. She had a bronchial infection shortly after Christmas, went to see her PCP who ordered a chest x-ray and CT scan.

She has a large (2" x 3") mass on the left lung and a mass about 1.5" x 2" on the top of her right lung. She went for a PET scan today and we're now waiting for a call from the doctor's office to schedule an appointment (hopefully for Monday) to find out the results of the PET scan.

She has lost about 15 pounds since Christmas and is sleeping a lot. The diagnosing process is taking its toll on all of us because it seems to move so slow.

Perhaps I'm writing a bit prematurely since we're not exactly sure what we're dealing with yet. However, I am struggling with the fact that I'm 200 miles away from parents, work full-time and have a young son. I'm not able to just go and be with my mom.

My dad and my sister are with her and they both have gone to every MD appt. She has many friends and a great support system which I'm so grateful for.

Still, I feel so bad I can't be there for her. We're very close.

What I really wanted to say was thank you to all of you who share your stories, words of wisdom and encouragement. I look forward to getting to know you (at least electronically) as we travel this journey. I can't begin to tell you how much this site has already helped in knowing we're not alone. Thank you!

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Hi, Annie. Welcome to the site. I'm glad you've taken a look around to see all the good information and success stories here.

Yes, it's very difficult waiting for the diagnosis. But once a treatment plan is in place and you know how you are going to fight, the emotions will even out a bit. The waiting and wondering is so hard. I'm sure your family understands why you can't be there as often as you want to be.

We're here to help you through this. Let us know when you get more information. We have many people who will be able to answer any questions you might have. And we also understand the need to vent once in awhile, too.


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Hi Annie-

Welcome to the forum. Sorry you have the need to be here, but you won't find a better group of people to help support you along the way.

Lynn is right - the waiting is awful but everyone will feel better once a treatment plan is in place - thats when everyone puts on their fighting gloves.

I am sure your mom understands that you can't be there all the time. You can help her in other ways. Share the comments you get from this site and the success stories that are here.

Whatever you do, do NOT listen to statistics - your mom is an individual, not a statistic. Make sure she brings someone along on doctor visits to ask questions and to be another set of ears for her. Have someone write down questions and everything the docs say regarding her treatment and her illness. Believe me, that will help a lot.

Looking forward to getting to know you better. Please keep us updated on you and your mom. Come here with any question and someone here will probably have an answer. And if you need to vent, vent away.

Hugs - Patti B.

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Dear Annie,

Speaking as a Mom, I know that you are helping your Mom in many ways.

Not all of our children live near us, and one of them (in Florida) cannot be here, except for infrequent visits near summer and holidays.

He has been a rock with emails and phone calls. We are so encouraged by his support.

You have come to a wonderful place at LCSC and we are here to help - anytime.

Welcoming you with warm thoughts and good wishes,


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My heart goes out to you...I am in the same situation except I am 830 miles away.

My brother and my grandmom will take care of her once she comes home from the hospital. They are going to have to let me know when I need to come home..in the meantime the phone is my contact with my mom.

God bless you.


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Thank you all for the warm welcome.

Barbara, I appreciate your point of view as a mom. It helps to hear that. I'm 47, and my mom is one of my best friends, but sometimes in thinking about her and this journey, I feel 7!

Patti, your advice about being sure someone is at MD appointments to take notes, ask questions is well taken. We have been tape recording the visits, so my parents can re-listen if needed. It will help me too when I go home, as I can feel I got all the information.

Ned, I pray your nickname takes on the other meaning very soon. I love your goldens--they're beautiful. Aloha!

Lynn, I noted it's been less than a year since the loss of your DH Larry. My heart goes out to you. Thank you for continuing to share your wise words and encouragement. It means more than I can say. I wish you peace.

Kelly, I hope you see my reply to your post introducing yourself. God bless you and your family.

I look forward to sharing with all of you.


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Our daughter will be 47 this May. Our eldest son will be 50 come fall, two other sons are 45 and 43.

We have been supported by all types of input (as they are able): phone, email, in person, and written. Whatever they can offer is gratefully received.

No matter how the support gets here, Bill and I are happy to embrace it all.

There are those times, Annie, when I feel as though I am 7. You are not alone.


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Hi Annie and welcome. You have received some excellent advice and words of wisdom already. You are absolutely right - the diagnostic part of the process if a very difficult one emotionally. I found the whole process was a "hurry up and wait" and that is very stressful on everyone. Once a treatment plan is in place you will all feel much better.

It is excellent that someone is taping the appointments. Honestly, I always had someone (usually my husband) with me; however, we often had different interpretations of what may have been said. I did try to go the recorder route; however, wouldn't you know it the silly thing wouldn't work. After asking the surgeon to start over twice I just looked at him and we both started laughing. Needless to say I never did get a recording of any appointments. I am so glad it is working out better for your family!

As to feeling some guilt about not living closer ...

Still, I feel so bad I can't be there for her.

you are still there for your mom in the way it counts, believe me. You sound like a wonderful, caring daughter and I am sure she appreciates you in more ways than you can count.

I hope they can get her diagnosed quickly and move on to treatment. Please keep us posted on how things progress.


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