Jump to content

We will handle it all!!!.


Recommended Posts

Our daughter has cancer. Stage IV

Waiting to see what is going to happen is very hard.

She has a wonderful husband who is handling everything.

We are on the outside looking in.

This has been going on since January of this year.

Lung, bones, lymph glands, and now her spine. Its in the blood.

She is now taking radiation for her spine.

That is, will it work???? We pray

God is there always and is helping us get through this.

She is fighting with all her might.

They have taken away so much of her strength, with one treatment after another. Some work, same don't.

Thanks for listening.

Friends are wonderful, but you hate to keep talking about what is going on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You have found the place to keep talking. As a daughter with cancer, I know how hard it was for me to open up to my parents. I knew the pain I was causing and the heartache they felt. I tried to keep them away, but after the third diagnosis, I surrendered to it all and let them in to help me.

Just do what you can for them. I know at one point, I never had laundry to do--someone always did a load. One Christmas my house was decorated. One spring flowers were planted. If you have grandchildren, take them out, at least for a few hours.

And show her this site. We have all been there.


Link to comment
Share on other sites

TAlk all you want for everyone on here knows what you are going through and how you feel. We have been there and done that at one time or another.

When I found this sight it was a God send to me. I found a place to vent and people who truely care.

Does your daughter live close? I sure hope so for she will need you too. I am sure her husband could use some help and your daughter would love to have you near her. There is nothing like motherly love....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Loving someone with cancer makes a person want to help...I have discovered that from the other side. I have always said that I am comforted by the fact that I have the cancer and not one of my children. I can't imagine how difficult that must be. You have come to the right place to talk your heart out, but don't underestimate your friends and their empathy with the hugeness of this struggle. Lean on whomever you have.

In the meantime, prayers,


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Norme & Margaret

Thanks for your thoughts.

I feel so helpless

She has always been so independent, that I am trying to honor that.

She and her husband have always taken care of themselves and really didn't want anyone else around. They don't have children.

It is nice to have this group of people to talk to.

I am going over as often as I can.

She lives just a few miles away.

God Bless to all

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yep, this is a good place to talk and let loose. We are all in this together. Your son-in-law may seem okay, but he needs all the help and support he can get -- even being relieved to do other things from time to time, especially something where he can relax away from it all. The radiation on your daughter's spine should shrink the tumor and relieve some of the pain. My wife had that. Keep us posted and let us know how we may help you. Don

Link to comment
Share on other sites


Knowing that someone has had the same thing helps.

The pain is the worse part. If it helps that would be wonderful

Thanks for your advice.

God Bless

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My heart goes out to you, I have two lovely daughters and I don't know how you bear this. I pray that the radiation will get rid of the pain quickly . Please keep in touch with us and don't be afraid to "vent". We all do it and I am on the verge of having another venting eppisode myself! :)

Meanwhile my thoughts and prayers are on their way to you all.


Link to comment
Share on other sites

You are in the right place for finding ways to help your daughter,

your SIL, may think he is able at this time to do everything,

but help will be needed for meals, washing and looking after the house

and keeping her company, offer and keep near and the opening

will come for you to help.

The treatment will release the pain but it may make her more

tired till all is done and even after it takes a few weeks for the

strength to come back.

Good vibes going your way.


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Looking in,

I was basically a newlywed when diagnosed (six months in to my second marriage). I had surgery to remove the tumor and two lobes of my right lung. To say it "hurt" would be an understatement...

The diagnosis of cancer is a tough one to swallow, whatever side of the fence you happen to be on. My husband needed to get away from that diagnosis and not have to deal with it 24/7. I pushed him to go back to work and my mother came to "Becky-sit" during the day. My father would drop my mother off on his way to work and pick her up on his way home. My husband still took me to ALL of my appointments and treatments, but my mother was around for support for both of us, as well.

I have been very lucky through this horrible journey - I've been surrounded by people who love me. Just give your daughter a gentle nudge every now and then so she knows you're still there...and keep in touch with the husband, too. It's a heavy burden, being a sole caregiver. He may decide he needs a break every now and then...

All my best,


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Good luck and God bless you all...

I will say a special prayer for your daughter.

I will also tell you that I was a single parent, in the midst of a miserable custody dispute with a vicious ex , when I was diagnosed. My parents who live 350 miles away would drop their lives and come up for two or three weeks at a time, post surgery, and during chemo, so I wouldn't be alone then.

It meant the world to me. It still does, that they would do that.

My dad was 80 at the time. My mom a few years younger.

If it weren't for them I don't know if I'd have made it...



Another grateful daughter.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks my friends for all your prayers. She is in the hospital today because of the pain. Hopefully they will find a way to control it. Her husband is still determined to handle this himself. We are here when needed. Her blood work seems to be alright. Now they need to find out if there is anything else they don't know about.

Will keep all of you informed.

God Bless

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.