Ann

Saying prayers for good test results.

Embarrassing Moment One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became apparent >that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some >months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. >Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that >I >would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a >small >diner and the odor of baked beans was more than I could stand. With >miles >to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I >reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had >consumed three large orders of baked beans. >All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas. Upon my >arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: >"Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded me >and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he >was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise >not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. > >The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure >was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room >I >seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It >was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over >a >skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and >fanned >the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other cheek, I >ripped >off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my >ears >carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like >this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. > > >When eventually the telephone farewells signalled the end of my >freedom, >I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on >my >lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased >with >myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband >returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked >through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he >removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table >chorused: "Happy Birthday!" > > >I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DON'T CHEAT AND LOOK AT THE BOTTOM FOR THE ANSWERS!!! History Exam... Everyone over 40 should have a pretty easy time at this exam. If you are under 40 you can claim a handicap. This is a History Exam for those who don't mind seeing how much they really remember about what went on in their life Get paper and pencil and number from 1 to 20. Write the letter of each answer and score at the end. Then, best of all, before you pass this test on, put your score in the subject line or at the end! 1. In the 1940's, where were automobile headlight dimmer switches located? a. On the floor shift knob b. On the floor board, to the left of the clutch c. Next to the horn 2. The bottle top of a Royal Crown Cola bottle had holes in it. For what was it used? a. Capture lightning bugs b. To sprinkle clothes before ironing c. Large salt shaker 3. Why was having milk delivered a problem in northern winters? a. Cows got cold and wouldn't produce milk b. Ice on highways forced delivery by dog sled c. Milkmen left deliveries outside of front doors and milk would freeze, expanding and pushing up the cardboard bottle top. 4. What was the popular chewing gum named for a game of chance? a. Blackjack b. Gin c. Craps! 5. What method did women use to look as if they were wearing stockings when none were available due to rationing during W.W.II a. Suntan b. Leg painting c. Wearing slacks 6. What postwar car turned automotive design on its ear when you couldn't tell whether it was coming or going? a. Studebaker b. Nash Metro c. Tucker 7. Which was a popular candy when you were a kid? a. Strips of dried peanut butter b. Chocolate licorice bars c. Wax coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside 8. How was Butch wax used? a. To stiffen a flat-top haircut so it stood up b To make floors shiny and prevent scuffing c. On the wheels of roller skates to prevent rust 9. Before inline skates, how did you keep your roller skates attached to your shoes? a With clamps, tightened by a skate key b. Woven straps that crossed the foot c. Long pieces of twine 10. As a kid, what was considered the best way to reach a decision? a. Consider all the facts b. Ask Mom c. Eeny-meeny-miney-mo 11. What was the most dreaded disease in the 1940's? a. Smallpox b. AIDS c. Polio 12. "I'll be down to get you in a ________, Honey" a. SUV b. Taxi c. Streetcar 13. What was the name of Caroline Kennedy's pet pony? a. Old Blue b. Paint c. Macaroni 14. What was a Duck-and-Cover Drill? a. Part of the game of hide and seek b What you did when your Mom called you in to do chores c. Hiding under your desk, and covering your head with your arms in an A-bomb drill. 15. What was the name of the Indian Princess on the Howdy Doody show? a. Princess Summerfallwinterspring b. Princess Sacajawea c. Princess Moonshadow 16. What did all the really savvy students do when mimeographed tests were handed out in school? a. Immediately sniffed the purple ink, as this was believed to get you high. b. Made paper airplanes to see who could sail theirs out the window c. Wrote another pupil's name on the top, to avoid their failure 17. Why did your Mom shop in stores that gave Green Stamps with purchases? a. To keep you out of mischief by licking the backs, which tasted like bubble gum b. They could be put in special books and redeemed for various household items c. They were given to the kids to be used as stick-on tattoos 18. Praise the Lord, and pass the _________? a Meatballs b. Dames c. Ammunition 19. What was the name of the singing group that made the song "Cabdriver" a hit? a. The Ink Spots b. The Supremes c. The Esquires 20. Who left his heart in San Francisco? a. Tony Bennett b. Xavier Cugat c. George Gershwin - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- ANSWERS 1. On the floor, to the left of the clutch. Hand controls, popular in Europe, took till the late '60's to catch on. 2. To sprinkle clothes before ironing. Who had a steam iron? 3. c) Cold weather caused the milk to freeze and expand, popping the bottle top. 4. a) Blackjack Gum. 5. Special makeup was applied, followed by drawing a seam down the back of the leg with eyebrow pencil. 6. a) 1946 Studebaker. 7. c) Wax coke bottles containing super-sweet colored water. 8. a) Wax for your flat top (butch) haircut. 9. a) With clamps, tightened by a skate key, which you wore on a shoestring around your neck 10. c) Eeny-meeny-miney-mo. 11. c) Polio. In beginning of August, swimming pools were closed, movies and other public gathering places were closed to try to prevent spread of the disease. 12. "Taxi, honey. Better be ready by half-past eight!" 13. c) Macaroni. 14. c) Hiding under your desk, and covering your head with your arms in an A-bomb drill. 15. a) Princess Summerfallwinterspring. She was another puppet. 16. a) Immediately sniffed the purple ink to get a high. (for many of us "getting high" wasn't even known about; we liked because of the smell; like eating the school jar paste. 17. Put in a special stamp book, they could be traded for household items at the Green Stamp store. 18. c) Ammunition, and we'll all be free. 19. a) The widely famous 50's group: The Inkspots 20. a) Tony Bennett, and he sounds just as good today.. SCORING 17-20 correct: You are older than dirt, and obviously gifted with mental abilities. Now if you could only find your glasses. Definitely someone who should share your wisdom! 12-16 correct: Not quite dirt yet, but you're getting there! 0-11 correct: You are not old enough to share the wisdom of your experiences.

Nope, Deb, can't say that I have. Think I'm a bit chicken to take on that line of work, althought I hear it pays well...lol! Have you ever run for public office?

Don't have any experience with this but am saying prayers for you and your husband.

Just wait till you read this one..... I remember when the elementary school I attended for the first three grades had a coal stove in each room. The boys would take turns bring in coal for each morning. I'm really not as old as Abraham Lincoln!!! This school was a little school in the Applachians. We did have electricity...lol. There was a coal furnace in the basement and a stove in each room, as the furnance couldn't really warm all of the two story building.

Holly, my heart goes out to you. I certainly wish you weren't in the position of having to make all of these terribly tough decisions. I have to say that I agree with others on the board that think it is time for you and your sweet little darling to return home to your husband. He's a brand new dad and I'm sure he wants to share in the joy of this sweet little baby. Speaking as a parent, I have to honestly say that your dad might just need some time alone in order to get his head together. After Dennis died, my boys were at my house continually, both day and night for a while. I have to tell you that I was actually relieved when they resumed their lives and I then started sorting mine out. I felt guilty for having them change their lives for me. Do you think your dad might feel like this, also? Somehow, I get the feeling that Holly is the one that's having trouble leaving right now. Being there, surrounded by all of your moms things, in her home, make you feel secure and close to your mom. Honey, your mom is no longer there. She will forever live in your heart. Wherever you are, there she will be. I'll be saying prayers that God will help you to make the right decisions.

No, Geri, but would love to someday. Have you ever started a conversation with a complete stranger that ended up being a friend?

Nope....Never laughed that hard. Have you ever cheated on a test?

I really like the amount of response that we get from these little games. So...here we go again. This is called "Have You Ever" I will start out with a question that begins...Have you ever... The next person will answer my question and then post a question that begins...Have you ever. Answer only the post in front of yours. Ready??? Have you ever been on a cruise?

My FIL had severe pancreatitis and was unable to eat. He had a feeding tube in for months. He was hospitalized for a few days and then came home with the tube. My MIL was able to care for him and became very comfortable with the tube. They did have a home nurse that came in and checked things out. The tube is now out and he is tolerating soft foods. This sshould be great for adding weight and nourishment. Praying things go well for your dad.

Good one, Fay. Yes...I remember.

Karen...I know how very much you have been dreading Thursday. Let's just keep praying that progression has slowed down and he will be able to remain on the clinical trial. I know how hard this is for you. Just try and put one foot in front of the other and take baby steps here. Convincing Ken that he could beat this disease was NOT a bad thing. Everyone needs someone in their corner cheering them on. Without hope, how far would he have come? As for Hospice,when the time comes, I can definitely recommend Weusthoff. They were so great to us when Dennis was ill. Our doctor actually called Hospice for us but I don'r think that's always necessary. Since you're dealing with doctors so far away, you might want to talk to the doctor about this on Thursday. I'm saying prayers for you guys!!! Call me if you need to talk!

OMG...Ginny, thanks for reminding me of Spin the Bottle. I used to have a huge crush on the brother of my best friend when I was in the 5th grade. We would play spin the bottle and kiss. Gosh...think of how more "advanced" 5th graders are now. A silly little kiss would be no big deal!

Larry, I am so very glad that your beautiful Alyce is eating and gaining some strength. I am also glad you have Hospice in to help both of you! I'm sure Alyce feels better knowing there is someone there to help you out. Sometimes, patients really worry about being a burden to their caregivers. I know Dennis used to always worry so much about me and was always trying to do things to make caring for him easier. I knwo it's also a wonderful feeling to know your son is headed home. Today is surely a sunny day for you...regardless of the weather. So sorry to hear about all the bad news with your fellow church members. I will certainly continue to remember you and Alyce in my prayers!

Love this one!!! Took my eight month old Tanner-Dog to Petsmart last night! What a trip! Talk about a happy boy! He paid absolutely no attention to all the other dogs in the store. However, he wanted to take home one of everything he could reach on the shelves!!! Why didn't someone tell me how hyper a Golden Retriever can be???

Hey Fay...had no idea you had East Tennessee roots? That's where I was born and bred. Hey...how about this one? When someone says..."See You Tommorrow" response is "Lord Willin' and the Creek Don't Rise" Now that I'm a city gal, I say creek but many people where I'm from still say "crick"

I'm rooting for the Steelers...even if they did take out my Colts! As a teenager, I loved the Steelers!!!

I remember walking to the local drug store after school, sitting on a stool at the counter, and watching them make the most wonderful shakes and floats!

Which team are you pulling for to win the Superbowl on Sunday?

Kimberly...so glad to hear your dad had a good response to the first chemo. That kind of news always helps to make you feel so much better about the situation. I was in an extrememly high stress job when Dennis was diagnosed. Thank goodness the company I worked for was very flexible and cooperative and adjusted my schedule so I could always go with him for all his appointments. I worked up until a month before losing him. Looking back, I wish I could have afforded to stop working much earlier in his illness and have more time with him.

Me too, Geri. Know most of them by heart. Hey...I guess it's a good thing I can remember the words. Right?

Tami, I'm certainly not a great one for advice in this category, as I am down a lot myself. Like you, I tried taking antidepressants and couldn't find one that didn't make me feel completely spaced out all the time. I can help you with the prayers. I think God has finally remembered who I am. Hope you feel better!!! If you need to talk just PM me.

This game is really making me realize how old I really am. Rich...I remember all three. I remember playing all those records on my little GE record player. It had the arm that would automatically drop down the 45's. My mom used to always yell at me to turn it down. She would have really loved boom boxes and surround sound!!!

I remember when girls were not allowed to wear slacks to school.