Treebywater

Thank you ALL. It is surely only with the prayers that I was able to finally land yesterday with my sanity intact. (what was I thinking having a connecting flight at O'Hare in January?! Aurgh!!!). I am here, safe and sound... my luggage will hopefully land that way soon, and that first hug from mom made all the travel bleckiness worth it. So... thanks!

Elaine-- Thank you for the reminder to be sensitive with my words as a family member... Seems like a tenuous line sometimes--wanting to stay and talk positive, and needing to validate and listen to the REAL feelings of the muck of this stuff. I WANT my mom to feel like she can tell me she's scared, that today is a really shi__y day, that she hurts physically and emotionally. I know I have to work to create that environment... I also know I have a very independent mother who has always tried to protect me from 'the bad stuff.' Know that is IS ok to not be strong. It IS ok to whine. It IS ok to not put on the brave front all the time. If this is the only place you feel safe doing that, then come here lots... (Sometimes I find that it's a comfort when someone will just give me permission to feel those things... so--You have permission!) ((((hugs)))) to you.

Wow! I had no idea!!! But I'm very glad to know that now!

I know there is a Prayer/Spirituality place, but I thought this might get a little more traffic. If it's in the wrong place, please let me know and I won't do it again. I head out tomorrow by plane to visit my mom and dad. I'm anxious for many reasons. I'm 33 weeks along now and worried about travelling this far into my pregnancy. I'm worried about actually SEEING mom and how this disease is effecting her. I'm travelling alone and that still makes me nervous. And there is some weather anticipated on mom and dad's end of things. So... if you could spare some prayers or good thoughts... I know it's a small thing, but it would mean a great deal to know people were pulling for me. I'm sure I will be checking in and may have even more questions/thoughts once I've actually been able to see mama. Thinking of and praying for you all as well!

Another big HOOYAH NED!!!

I don't know much about the technical stuff... but I can tell you about giving blood. It's really NOT as scary as it sounds at first. I was terrified to do it until I was in college, and then somebody drug me to a drive and I found out it was really no big deal. Actually the part that hurts the most is the little prick they do on your finger to check your iron levels (and it's really not that bad). I always brought along someone to hold my hand and keep my attention elsewhere when I was first getting used to the idea of donating. Then I graduated to bringing "happy places." Yes, I would actually bring in little pictures to look at during the parts I didn't want to think about or look at. And now, I just bring a book to read. So... give it a try. You might find it's not as scary as you think. And what a gift that would be for your mom!!!

((((((Hugs))))))) to you. I know there must be days when you are just so tired... and sad and run down by the negatives that you hear, while still hurting so much for what your mom is going through. I wish there was something I could say to make it better for all of you, but know that I am thinking of and praying for you all. If you need a sounding board, PM or IM me.

Praying for you!!! I hope it's nothing! I hope your pea soup and peas regimine does the trick for now. Will be anxiously awaiting an update.

Yay for Stable!

She's not doing chemo yet... So it's either got to be from the pain meds, or from the radiation. But she seemed to indicate it was all the time rather than just during radiation. Will keep looking.

Oh... sounds like such good news. Potentially curable... what great words!! I have no words of wisdom cause I'm on the bottom part of the steep learning curve myself, but wanted to offer my prayers for a speedy recovery.

Sorry to be so full of questions... Mom wanted me to ask around/look around and see if there is anything that can combat the awful, nasty taste she has in her mouth. I guess it is from the pain meds? She's using Fentonil and Vicadin (sorry if I butchered spelling). She's also doing Radiation. So... has anybody else experienced this and did you find anything to help? Me and Mom thank you muchly.

Hooyah NED and Empty Head!!!! (Sorry, Got a little Navy there. ) What fantastic news!

Thank you for all your responses. I've passed them on to mom and dad. After what you've all told me and the research I've done, I feel like our doctor is being more agressive than I expected. I'm glad. Good to know a little bit more about what we're dealing with too. Now... I just want to get to where we're doing the chemo stuff... We need to start slaying this beast! Thanks again for all of your input and encouragement!

Prayers going up here too!

I was wondering what any of you could tell me about Gemzar and Cisplatin. Once mom is through her radiation treatments that's what they will start her on. Is that a pretty typical course of action for NSCLC? Typical for Stage IV dealing with bone mets? Mom is going to a smaller hospital. I know a lot of people feel that you need to find a larger cancer center to get the best care. I'm trying to get a feel for whether her doc is being agressive about things or... well... not. Is there anything anybody can tell me about what she can expect as far as side effects with these drugs in particular? I know it's different for everybody. And, can you refer me to some good websites to look for information about such things on? Looks like I get to be the Internet Research fiend for the family. Thanks all!

I'll be praying. Do keep us posted.

Woohoo! I did it. I can be techno-savvy.

So... how do I set up a signature with all the pertinent info in it. I know how to do a signature, but... what information needs to go there? What if I'm not all clear on dates etc? Can someone give me a little direction? And how can I do a fun avatar picture in the corner?

AMEN!!!

No words... Just ((((hugs))))

I hate the word 'palliative.' I really do. It is currently my least favorite word. I'm sorry that you and your mom had to hear it. My mom's LC is inoperable as well. And I'm in the same boat as you--what mind frame do we take? Of course we fight the beast, but do we fight it hoping to beat it, fight it hoping to buy time, or... what? Maybe I think you just fight... for whatever. Your mama will want to fight to see as much of your kiddos as she can. My mama will fight to meet and thoroughly enjoy as much of my daughter on the way that she can. I haven't figured out what 'hope' means yet, but for some reason, without understanding the word, I have gripped onto it with all my might. I agree with what the others say as well. Your mom and my mom are NOT statistics. They are people. I hope my mom blows the doctor's prognosis away. I feel confident that she can. I hope your mom blow's the doctor's prognosis away. I also know the helpless feeling that comes from knowing your mama is in so much pain. It's awful. Maybe too, you don't need to be anything for your mom except her daughter. You cheer her on... You call her when you need her... You listen when she needs to talk... You confide in her when she's up to it. And you cling to that elusively mysterious word hope all the while. ((((hugs)))) to you. I'm sorry for this news. We'll plod along with you. Sending prayers for you and her up now.

Cheryl, I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I don't know much, but it sounds encouraging to me that your doctor says after treating them you can go ahead and do the vaccine treatment. It sounds like even he just sees this as a bump in the road. I am sure those that you love haven't even thought of the word 'burden.' I would suspect that more likely they feel blessed with the priveledge of walking the road with you--through the goods and the bads. Keep fighting and clinging to hope. (((((hugs))))) to you. My prayers are with you.

Happy Holidays to you as well! I'm a newbie. I wanted to say that I am glad to hear your mom is doing so well.... and while I can't speak for others here, I must say that, as one in the beginning of all of this... every time I hear of someone else doing well for longer than expected... I get a rush of hope. So THANK YOU. I am sorry to hear of your health problems. You will be in my prayers. You sound like a very strong woman. I am glad for your post tonight.

This has been mentioned in another thread already, but it seems like every day since Mom's diagnosis, I am... processing through my feelings about the way people react and the feelings of support/lack thereof I've felt since everything came down. It's funny, I don't think people can say anything right to me right now, but people not saying anything is even worse. I don't like the questions, 'How are you?' or 'How is your mom?' because I don't know if people really want to know. When people DON'T ask or I get through a whole conversation with someone I haven't talked with in a bit, but who knows the situation without anything even being mentioned, I wince at that, too. Don't they care that this is happening to us? I know that they do, but likely don't know what to say and/or can't or don't want to think about something like this happening to someone. Apparently, when my folks have told a couple of people, they've had to deal with... of all things... lectures/I told you sos about smoking. As if anyone ASKS for a disease like this.... That makes me the most angry. So... I feel bad for anyone who tries to talk to me about this stuff at this point (aside from you folks with the 'been there, done that' t-shirts), because unless they are extremely intuitive and sensitive they're damned if they do and damned if they don't. And at the same time... I am finding that the feelings of isolation from dealing with this as well as other uncertainties and impending obstacles, is no fun too. I guess I need to stop being so over-sensitive and let people deal with it and me as they are able... and I'm sure my expectations are too high and my communication about the issue haven't been the greatest. Anyway... I guess I just wanted to muse about that for a second. *Musing finished*