Treebywater

Hi Caroline, Looks like we are about the same age, and our Mom's were diagnosed about the same time. My Mom is also Stage 4. I hate to hear that your Mom has had such a tough time. It could definitely be worth it to get another opinion, specifically about treatment options... but I have a feeling that's really going to be up to your Mom. I wanted to say that... as an also 24 year old, I can so relate to the, "I know I'm a grown-up, but I still need my Mom" sentiment. I'm sure... no matter how grown-up we get we'll always feel that way. Early adult-hood when the 'grown-up world' is still so new and experimental for me has been a time when I want to call and say--"What do you think about this, Ma?" ALL the time. It's hard... I'm sorry you're hurting so much, and that she is hurting so much. ((((hugs)))) to you. Val

Maybe you guys can help me understand a little... or give me some advice about what to do. I have mentioned in other threads that I call Mom and Dad every day. I call to check in on how the day is going... see where Mom is at in things, see how Dad is feeling and dealing, and to know what their needs are... not to mention just to talk to my folks. Most of the time, Mom doesn't want to talk to me. Well... I hope that is not true. Most of the time, Mom doesn't want to talk on the phone. I know it takes a tremendous amount of physical and emotional energy on some days. And I know if I was spending most of my day puking my guts out or being in pain I might not want to either. But still, sometimes, it hurts. Different folks here have said, "Call just to say Hi and I love you." Well, I am trying to... but Mom doesn't want to take the phone to hear me say it. I WANT TO say it. I want to say it every day. If the beer truck comes to get me, Mom, or Dad, I want to know that that has been said, you know? So... my questions are--can you help me to understand her point of view? PLEASE KNOW that each and every day I say, "Don't take it personally, Val. Mom loves you. She just can't do this today." I am not angry at her. I am just sad I guess. Could this be one of her ways of creating a little distance to make things easier on top of her being very tired? Am I doing something wrong and wearing her out when she does talk? Should I just try other ways of saying I love you often... like send cards or notes or something? And... Is it ok for me... or fair for me... to say--Mom... I'd like to talk to you more. And I understand it takes a lot of energy, but it would make me feel better to even just be able to say Hi, and I love you? Is that an ok request to make? Or would that make her feel guilty and/or be an unfair demand? I wonder if things will be easier in this regard when I head back to be with them after wee farkle is born (by the way--only 8 days til my due date. ). I hope so, but I know there will be new challenges then. Thanks all! Val

Fay--I wanna come live on your street so I can come listen to you play the recorder, and learn from your wisdom. I'm so glad I read this today. I needed it. You are BEAUTIFUL!!!

Kate, I'm so sorry... My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Another ((((hug)))) for you. I hope this chemo kicks the cancer's butt and does it fast!

I'm so sorry you got this news... I don't know what else to say. Know I am praying for all of you! ENJOY the circus... mmm... cotton candy... and trapeziness... and clowns!!! I hope your little girl squeals with delight, giggles, and wiggles and fills you with joy and hope as she watches!

GREAT!!!

Beth you are SOOO NOT A WHINER. You're a fighter. Anybody with 1/4 of a brain can see it. Don't let this get you down...

GREAT NEWS!!!

((((Hugs)))) He IS a good God and full of grace and compassion. I have no doubt that your daddy is safe in His arms.

Hi Patti-- My Mom was just diagnosed with Stage IV NSCLC in November. I'm a little further in the game than you, but not a whole lot. It all still feels very scary. I'm so glad that the folks here have had such good advice. I agree--GO GET ANOTHER OPINION and think about another Doctor. This isn't a death sentence. There is HOPE for your Mom and mine! Stick around here and you'll find so many stories that will help you to know that. You've already heard some of them! --Val

Praying for you guys!

I just said the weirdest prayer I think I've uttered. "Please God let it be fungus." Thinking about you, Beth!

Prayers said. I found a lump a few weeks ago myself... Was rather disconcerted by it. Doc. said it was no big deal (and I will check with another doctor when I am geographically somewhere else, because I want to!). I know that is scary. ((((hugs)))) to you.

It IS working. It IS working. It IS working. Glad you're through with the first one! Mmmm... ice cream sounds good!

No answer to give--but I'm interested in seeing what others have to say. Have been thinking of figuring out how to network some 'talking it through' support when I head back to IL. Andrea--your story made me chuckle. I'm a little uneven too. Actually very. Can remember one time Mom saying, "Val... you're crooked! Go fix yourself!" And I was like... "I can't! I'm just made this way!" (((hugs))) to you and hang in there.

I'm so glad she's doing better!

Prayers said!

I just love NED... Did he bring you flowers???

I am so sorry to hear the news of your friend, but I am SOOO happy to hear that things are lining up so well for your mom! Keep us posted!!!!

PRAYING for you!!! DON'T give up. It may read bad, but it's doctor's gobbledygook and we know they (some of them, sometimes) like to hear themselves talk... er... write... er... whatever. It sounds as if you are awfulizing to the Nth degree. If you need to do that to hit back extra hard... (sometimes innitial awfulizing is my strategy) then get through it and get to kicking butt as soon as you can. It's NOT a death certificate. You have LIFE to live, and breath in your body NOW. We're praying!

I'm so sorry that the news is so difficult right now... I'm praying that the doctor's thinking is wrong, and that this new combo of drugs WILL bring a turn-around. Most of all, I pray for peace for you and your family.

Curtis, Your words always bring me hope... I know I haven't been here long. I can't explain why, but they do. Thank you for being real here. Val

Congratulations!!!! ENJOY that little one!

Prayers being said for you!