missyk

Just chiming in with another opinion that you should look into stereotactic radiosurgery (SRS, cyberknife, ect) instead of whole brain radiation...Mom's tumors were "zapped" by it and all she said was she could feel "a strange feeling" where the tumor was for a few days. Best wishes and hugssss...

Thank you all for your kind words, your understanding, and your advice. What would i do without you all to advise me through this?? I don't even want to imagine! My step-father called today and brought me to tears with him saying the simple words, "I've accepted what's going to happen." He's been the one, since her diagnosis, that's said "she's too much of a bit*h to die" *giggles* so for him to say that he's accepted that things aren't going to work out like we'd hoped just crushes me. Yet, tomorrow's another day and every day after that...and each is a blessing, as you've all reminded me, yet again. I really DO think we're starting on the downhill slide...but who knows how long that will take with this danged disease. I pray that she makes that year mark that the doctor's said at first she'd never see...it would be like stickin it to them just ONE more time! LOL Thanks again, everyone...i've come to love you all and pray daily (and nightly!) for everyone...

Luann.. Glad you found the site, but sorry you had to. One of the first things pounded into my head when i came on was that statistics mean NOTHING...and i wholeheartedly agree. Mom is 10 months in since diagnosis (primary in left lung, mediastinal lymphnode involvement and met to brain) and she's going along just fine. As of her last scan she wasn't lighting up anything but a single node near her neck. Please know that your mom has as good a shot at winning as any and that there is NO zero survivorship...there's always at least one who makes it and nothing says your mom (or mine, or any on here) aren't that one! Prayers and good thoughts coming your way...

Shelly... My first thought when i read he said "Ouch, that hurt" was What do you think it feels like for you to make that jump with NO evidence??? Stupid, stupid man. I'm so glad you stood up for your sister, though i understand feeling a bit guilty for it the next moment. I've gone rounds with Mom's onc and nurses in the hospital because Mom doesn't want to feel like she's being a "pest" by asking for her tylenol (the only pain medication she takes). So, Shelly, Good For You!!! And prayers for the results to be great!

Things are going pretty well, life is as normal as it gets...and yet i find myself sitting in tears. Spring break starts tomorrow for our school district and Mom is having Sabrina stay with her Sunday night and maybe longer, depending on how she feels and all...and just the thought brought tears to my eyes once again. I'm SO happy Mom is feeling up to it at 10 months since diagnosis...yet i can't help myself from thinking of all the times that Sabrina will miss if this dang disease takes her grandma. I worry so about Mom...what she's going through is unimaginable to me. I told my husband tonight...the feeling for ME is that someone reached in and grabbed a handful of my innards, so i can't fathom what it must feel like to be Mom. Then, there's that pesky thought that floats around in my mind (and God how it makes me feel guilty when it floats close to the surface!) that it seems like it's taking forever. There's that part of me that says "she's going to die" and it wonders how cruel it can be on making us wait in limbo, i guess. Yet, when i feel like that i immediately burst into tears feeling like i'm wishing her dead when in all actuality i hyperventilate when i even ponder her being gone. I have GREAT things going on in my life that we're all sharing in, we're getting ready to build a brand new house, i have a new nephew, my sister's getting her master's degree, my daughter's....well, she's goofy still...and we've NEVER been happier than we are now sharing it with mom. Yet, there's that lingering feeling for me that it's so special because she's dying. I'm not sure how to get around this.

Janice, Hi...and so sorry that you've had to find us, but SOOO glad you have. I just turned 31 (lord, i'm getting old! LOL) and Mom was diagnosed in May of '05 with NSCLC. I know it's not "the same"...but some things are...like the way you're feeling right now. Lordy, woman, I've been there. I'm lucky that Mom and I have always been close enough for me to tell her anything...so when i felt like i SHOULDN'T be happy she shut the door on that right away. She (and i'm sure your dad) want our happiness!! We're still their children, regardless. As for Dad...is he still taking his meds for the bi-polar disorder?? Some of the other drugs (legal and illegal) could be effecting those, too. Just do as you've been doing, love him, support him...and try not to be too tough on him...he's going thru alot, too. You're always welcome to send me a message if you'd like. Love and prayers...

We're crossing stuff here in Iowa that no one ever thought COULD be crossed! Much luck and many prayers comin your way, Cindi!

Barb...Blaze!!! Welcome!! My daughter LOVES those books!! We go and find them when we can...bought a whole lot of them from a local library that was clearing them out for "newer" books! I'm so glad to hear you've been good since the resection! Makes us all smile, i think, when we see someone doing well after 5+years! Lots of good feelings coming your way...

Merrilee... Welcome to this wonderful place!!! (And WOW! another neighbor!)

I'm available in Iowa/Nebraska/Missouri/Illinois/Minnesota area Did i get all of them that border us?

Just dropping my own Welcome Darrell in here! As you can tell already, there are many who care and are there for you! Sorry you had to find this place, but glad you did! Many prayers coming for you,

Welcome Gracie (and neighbor!!!) Mom was diagnosed over 9 months ago with stage IV lung cancer with mets to the brain...she's still kickin right along. I'm sorry to hear you had to find this place, but glad you did. You'll find many who've been there and much love, support, and many prayers.

Welcome, Fran! You'll find many who've walked the road you're travelling before you and great information...along with alot of hugs, prayers, and love. Again, welcome

Sneaks in by myself looking for a buddy I don't qualify as an oldtimer, do i? Someone just point me in the right direction after handing me a Guinness!

Sue.. I'm so terribly sorry for your loss. I wish I had words to better convey how I feel...but I'm at a loss for them. (((Sue))) Prayers for comfort for you and your family.

Hospice can be such a wonderful help, so i agree with Ry about that completely...if you don't have it, give them a call. Having worked in a nursing home as an aide for 6 years and spent many hours with family,I can say it's difficult for the nurses, also. I know that there were many families that i just didn't know how they'd react to the realization that a loved one may be getting to their last days. I found, finally, that it was easiest on them to just listen instead of trying to advise...maybe that's what they're trying for and just not getting it right. Much love to you and your family and prayers for strength...

Jodi... Like everyone else on here i'm going to say...it's so normal to have ups and downs. I, like Kelly, do most of my crying in the car...especially when i hear certain songs. (Big surprise there!) I really didn't know if i'd make it through the time after initial diagnosis, it seemed so stinkin unfair. Time has passed and the ups and downs have become the "new normal" and still there are days when i feel like i walk around looking like I once asked a friend if i should just put a sign up telling everyone what i'm dealing with when i'm like that so i don't have to answer so many questions. But i've learned, also, that those who need to know, those who are friends, know without me having to explain. We're here for you, up or down. Hugssss you tight...

Oh No!!! How Terrible!! Prayers on their way...and many of them!

Val... Wow...and here i thought i was the only one who got catty about that particular subject. My MIL is the sympathy-seeking kind of person, and her views on alot of things in life are the complete opposite of mine and Mom's, too. I get irritated so often thinking of Sabrina going through the years of growing up without my mom to balance the other grandmother's words and actions. And i worry. ((Val)) Just love her, and your love with carry your mom's love right to her! (And...lol...my MIL couldn't even remember it was Sabrina...called her Samantha for almost a year, then just switched to Angel ) With all my love to you and that precious baby girl!

Runs around smooching all of ya!!! Welcome to this nutty, happy, goofy, and sometimes sad place, Sandra. I think what makes me feel so comfortable here is that we're all unique, all have our own "history" with cancer and our lives in general...but here, we find a commonality that is so reassuring.

Sharon... Just wanted to drop in and tell you that, for Mom, it was the Tarceva that FINALLY got her losing enough hair that we shaved it off her. (See avatar)

Prayers coming from Iowa! Sure hope they get that crap fixed up for him! ((Sue))

I'm so sorry...my sincerest sympathies to all of Jen's family.

All i can offer is our experience and that is that the SRS has taken care of both a one inch tumor (what does that translate to in metric?? i'm terrible with the conversions)and a one cm tumor that surgery was not an option for. Mom also had headaches before she had the tumor's "zapped" and always said she could almost "pinpoint" where the tumor was when they found it. Prayers coming your way! Don't let it get you down!!

sheesh, i almost forgot... It can never hurt to call the doctor and check things out you're not sure of, first of all. Secondly, Mom was put on Tarceva as something for maintaining her good results and to hold her steady, so yes, she was put on it BECAUSE she had good results. (Again, someone might come along who will know better than i, but that's what we were told)