ma's kid

Welcome, Lulu This is such a scary time but please know that *here* you will find wonderful support,lots of love and tons of info. Adding your mom to my prayers. Libby

Just wanted to say thanks again for all of your support. Looks like tomorrow is her last chemo treatment..fingers and everything that can be crossed are crossed that her blood counts are in the acceptable range. Mom is so ready to feel better. She said at the beginning of this journey that she was just going to pretend that she was pregnant on the days she felt lousy...yesterday, she said she must be pregnant with an alien...she made me laugh! Prayers and healing thoughts for everyone. Libby

Kim, Such a difficult situation for you both. Hopefully, now that she did drive she will realize it just isn't safe right now. Personally, as far as the kids being in the car...I would absolutely put my foot down and not allow it. I think I would take a firm but gentle approach and frame it with lots of love and concern. Maybe you can get her doc to say *no driving* for a while? Hang in there, I know how trying and difficult this is for you. Blessings Libby

YES, Eppie...you are so right in that we all will get through this! Hugs to your dad. Your humor is so refreshing. Hang in there, ok! Libby

My prayers as well, Pammie. Love, Libby

Yes, thanks for checking in! Thank goodness you all are ok. Libby

Welcome, Marie...glad you're here but sorry there is a need. I know it's scary but coming *here* really will help you through those times. You are in my prayers Libby

Wanted to welcome you and let you know that there is always hope...always! Everyone has given you wonderful, useful advice, especially about finding out every thing you can, writing down your questions and coming *here* for support and info. Adding you to my prayers and please hang in there! Libby

I really don't have much to add to what's been said except about my dad and prior to his death he went through a period of *questioning mixed with fear* Fortunately, he was lucid enough that we shared our own individual beliefs. I had a strict Catholic upbringing and adding to that mix, both of my parents are Italian and there isn't any better word to describe them other than *old fashioned* Old fashioned about EVERYTHING! I am a product of the 60's and I am sure, gave both my parents *fits* I questioned every single thing and our household was one in that...communication was open. I was very comfortable discussing and asking about anything and everything. We had many discussions about God, spirituality. I have always felt the closest to God *outside*...never within the confines of church, per se and my dad knew that. On the day my father passed away it was stormy and raining...bitterly cold too. I needed to get away for a few minutes, so I went and sat outside. I found myself pleading with my dad to give me some sort of a sign that he was ok and that he had *made it to heaven* About 30 seconds later, a swallowtail butterfly landed on the patio table...she had tattered wings, and her color had paled but she was there, nonetheless. It was mid January!!! I choose to believe that was my sign and that I was not hallucinating, LOL and Benny, I was so comforted. The day we went to the mortuary there was only one vehicle in the parking lot and it was a white truck and belonged to an electrician (knew that because of the writing/advertisment) and the license plate was from the town my parents had just moved from a year prior. My dad was an electrician all his life and the town on the license plate was 400 miles away! When we went in, I asked who the truck belonged to and they did not know..we were the only family in there. The day my mom had her biopsy and was put in a room for recovery, one of my brothers came running down the hall and had me follow him. My mom's room was right next door to a room that was labled *The electrical room*...we just smiled at one another. There were all kinds of empty rooms and she could of been put in any one of them. Before my dad died he put those little malibu yard lights all over the backyard. They weren't the solar kind but were wired...anyway, over the years, one by one they have given out and my mom has replaced them with the solar kind, with the exception of one...it never ever goes on anymore...except when I come to visit. In May, our house burned to the ground and we were to be away for the weekend and the ONLY picure I went back and got..was the last pic taken of me and my dad. I don't know why I went back and got the picture but on some level I knew I had to. I know none of this probably helped with your questions but I think as long as your mom can talk to you about what she's thinking, that in itself is comforting. I know my dad was fearful for a time but our closeness and talks really did help him. I KNOW in my heart Benny that we go to a better place..one filled with light and love. Hugs for your mom, Benny Libby

Good morning, Ben! I need to get to work and just do not have time to respond...I will be back but wanted you to know just how very much I appreciate and respect your questions. Blessings, Libby

You guys are just the BEST! Thank you for your support. On a good note...mom had an *ok* w/end and I impressed upon her the need to drink plenty of liquids and to rest as much as she needed. My prayers for everyone. Libby

Oh, Holly..I am glad that your mom is getting some relief from the pain and also that you have someone to come in and help. Many prayers for you all. Love to your precious baby! Libby

I just don't know what to say..gentle hugs. Libby

You guys will have an absolute ball! Very sweet of you to plan this... Enjoy! Libby

Welcome, Kim! Really glad you found us but sorry there is a need. I hear what you are saying about the change in your mom's personality...we have seen a change in my mom as well. Super bouts of confusion, anger and lots of little things that make it seem *just who IS THIS person!* I hang onto once the chemo is over, perhaps most of the personality changes will vanish! Please know that your mom and you are in my prayers, ok! Your mom is so very lucky to have you in her life..you sound like a wonderful, loving daughter and I believe, on some level your mom knows that and feels your love. This is a difficult path for all of us to be on but your attitude is wonderful! Be good to yourself, Kim..as that is important as well. Libby

Hi everyone! Well, we *were* on the downslide and then the doc delayed mom's last chemo treatment cuz her white count is down! I say downslide because she is oh so ready to not do this anymore. All in all she's done fairly well with both the radiation and the chemo. The doc did say he was giving her a strong dose and that she would feel pretty lousy and that has been the case. Not right away, but as the weeks have progressed, she has become increasinly fatigued, a tad confused and really weak. She had problems from the rad and her esophagus but thankfully that has improved! I think a scan will be ordered in about a month and then we will see what's what with this ugly disease. To say we are all apprehensive, is a gigantic understatement but if I have learned anything at all walking this road with her, it is to enjoy every single moment and to try and not worry bout' things we cannot control. A large part of my mindset is because of all of you beautiful people. You will never ever know just how helpful and comforting this board is for me. Even though my other family members do not come here, I constantly share with them anything I learn. I thank you for your support from the bottom of my heart and please know each and every single one of you and your family members are in my prayers. I truly believe, *together* we do make a difference. Love and light Libby

Adding your mom to my prayers, Troy. You, too Libby

welcome, Toni Libby

I would like to add my birthday wishes as well for all Oct babies! I try and get here everyday but don't always make it to every thread/room. Libby

Whew...love all kinds of music. Enjoy contemporary Jazz (adore Nora Jones, Boney James, Warren Hill) and have to have my fix of the Rolling Stones every now and then! We are seeing them in concert next month...AGAIN! Love to listen to big band cuz it reminds me of my dad and all the times we danced. Sweet memories. Libby

Bunny, again...thank you for the update. They are so in my prayers! I am glad they can attend the wedding. Blessings all around Libby

Hello, Mitzu We had hospice for my dad and all in all, we found the nurses very supportive, not only of my dad but of the entire family. Anything he needed, was always delivered quickly. They seemed to anticipate his needs even before we asked for things. The only negative thing we encountered was there was a shortage of nurses and they were spread pretty thin so their visits were sometimes cut short because other families were also in need. Please know you and your family will be in my prayers. Libby

I just don't know what to say other than please know that you and your husband are in my prayers. Reading your post brought tears to my eyes as I can feel the love and caring in your words...the anguish too. Blessings to you all. Libby

Thanks so much for the update, Bunny. They both have been on my mind all day. Please tell them my prayers and love are with them...praying for a miracle. Libby

((((Pat, Brian)))) Mega prayers and healing energy being sent. Please update when you can. Gentle, loving hugs Libby