jamie

Hi... I can understand your feelings about not being sure how to act. My Dad has stage 3b LC, and he is a big fun, jokster kind of guy. I wasnt sure how to even approach him after his dx.... but he cleared that up right away by saying to me... "Geese, I never seen the cancer warnings on cigarettes, i just thought they'd turn my fingernails yellow!". That was it, I knew he was his old self. I guess you have to take the cue's from him. See how he's feeling about cancer that day. As far as his wife, reassure her that no doctors can tell how long a person will live, or the queality of life. He may live longer than expected, with minimal complications. Take each day as it comes. Good luck to both your friend and his wife.. Jamie

Hi-Im so sorry to hear about your dad, but you seem to be doing all of the right things for him. My dad also has nsclc, stage 3b, but is soon to be downstaged, (thank god). Chemo was not so bad on my Dad, but bad enough. By keeping track of everything for your Dad, Im sure that you are making sure everything is going in his best interest. My Dad dosent even know what kind of chemo he is on, and wont let me come to his appts! Sounds like you guys have a great relationship, and your doing a great job being your Dad's advocate. Keep up the good work, and the best of luck to you and your Dad.

Hi- I dont really have any answers about the chemo exactly, but I can tell you from my Dad's expeirence that his moods were up and down like a rollercoater for the first couple of weeks. One minute he was is regular funny haha self, and the next he was ready to give up too. The single most important thing that Ive learned from this whole cancer expierence, is that although you may feel like your on this rollercoaster ride together, your Mom is dealing with it in herself... and as hard as it is... you have to let her grieve, laugh, or whatever she wants to do at the time. Ive come to realize that as hard as all this is for me, its 100% harder on my Dad. Whatever decision she comes too in the end, she's bound to change her mind and her mood a hundred times from now till then. Ive also learned that while my Dad feels horrible for a few days, he also ends up feeling great days too. Take everyday in stride, and Im sure that your Mom will be feeling better soon. Best of Luck to you Both!!!

Hi.. I too have no answers, but want to welcome you. Post questions and post more questions... eventully, someone will come up with an answer for you. I know they always come up with something for my questions... which is at least 1 a day it seems like... Welcome again, and the greatest of luck!! Jamie

Hi there... Just like everyone else, I want to welcome you to the board. Any questions, concerns, or even if you just want to vent,,, this is the place to be! Good Luck to you both Jamie

Hi T- I dont really have any answers, but I can tell you from my Dad's expierence that chemo didn't give him anywhere near the problems that radiation has. The radiation was a hundred times worse on him then the chemo.... I know everyone responds differently, but I hope that chemo is a breeze compared to the radiation for you too... The best of luck.. Jamie

Hi everyone. I have just one question this time... My Dad will be going in for surgery by the end of the month, I guess the doctors will be removing half of the right lung. We are so excited (or as excited as you can be about surgery-but excited none the less)... They seem to be pretty sure that there is no cancer left in any lymphnodes, , and nothing at all was glowing on the PET scan anywhere else... great news right??? Not so fast.... My Dad was reffered to a different hospital for the surgery, and when he was making that appointment, the doctor had said that the surgery only improves his chance of survival by 5%, and the following 3 rounds of chemo given after surgery gives him about another 5%. Now my Dad is wondering if this is "that great of news"... Dont get me wrong, we know how very lucky we are right now, not only because the tumor can be removed, and also because of the shrinkage, and the cancer responding in his lymphnodes, and getting the heck out of there.... but why wouldnt his chances for survival be only greatened by 10%???? If theres no cancer in his lymphnodes anymore, and the tumor and surrounding tissue is gone.... whats the problem?? I know there is always a good chance of reoccurance down the road, and the chance of not getting it all this time around but even still... are there more factors that Im not seeing? Ok just one more question... The doctor said my Dad had been given "the watered down" version of chemo, and after the surgery he will be getting the full blast, the real thing ... Now I know these arent "medical terms", we rather it this way, but has anyone had both "the watered down version, and then the "full blast" after? It would seem to me it should have been the other way around... Aggressive first, and slightly less aggressive after just to make sure they got it all... then again I am no doctor. The chemo didnt bother my Dad at all, and Im wondering if this will since its "stronger"... Any advice welcome, invited.... Thanks for listening Jamie P.S. The new picture is of my Kids... they make my Dad both smile and cringe everytime they knock on the door to ransack his house.

welcome... im sure that you will find out anything you need to know here. I think i got more answers from this site then from the oncologists! You got the right idea about this cancer thing... Your additude rocks! I wish I could suck some positive thinking out of you and put it in my Dad! Welcome again. Jamie

Love the Coffee Shop forum idea!!! You guys are just too easy to talk with... I might never get off this computer!

Sorry to hear that it is back, I just read your post last week and was glad to hear that it was gone. Sorry that I dont have any answers, but the pain clinic seems like a really good idea. P.S. Keep complaining... this is the place to do it because what may seem like complaining to you might be helpful information to someone who is going through the same.... I hope you get some relief soon, and start feeling as good as you were... or even better!

Hi there, My dad also got some conflicting information, and also was not demanding answers. They originally told him that he was going to try chemo and radiation, and then hope for surgery, then he was not a canidate for surgery (4 weeks into the chemo and radiation) ,and now his doctors tell him that they will probably be removing his tumor! I can understand how fusterating this can be... My advice to you and your Mom is to edjucate yourself and demand a straight answer. I think doctors forget that they may know what is going on, but forget to keep you informed. I would keep on with her regular oncoligist, but schedule a meeting to get all the facts straight. That is what my Dad finally did, and when they realized that he was getting information that wasn't clear, they looked harder at his files to explain things to him, and finally were able to give him clearer info. But ask questions!!! My dad went 4 weeks thinking that he was going to get his tumor removed, and when they told him that he wasn't , he was let down. He should have asked in the first place. I hope everything goes well. Keep us posted. Jamie

great news! Sounds like you guys got a great doctor too, that reallyhelps. Keep us posted, and congratulations!!!

Thank you guys so much for sharing in the great news... also for all the information. I feel like were starting all over, and we havent met with the doctor for a lengthy apt. yet, so Im sure we'll be finding out more in the weeks to come. One of the questions we are planning on asking is, staging, and if his prognosis is improved (Im guessing that the answer will be yes ), and also I know that we will be finding out how much of the lung they will be removing. Any concerns I should have about operation? I know all ops are risky, but we think any risk is worth taking since weve come this far. One thing I forgot to mention, that is pretty important... My dad's father is in the ICU at the hospital now as I type this, dying from Lou Gehrigs disease. I thank God that my Dad got some good news, because my Grandpa isn't expected to live the day. I just wish he could have been awake to hear the good news about my Dad before he dies, because it would have been a great load off his shoulders. Thanks again for all the support, and if anyone has any stories or information on Op's please let me know... I wish all of you the same luck and happiness Im feeling right now... Keep the posts comin! Jamie

Connie, you were one of the first people to post back to my messages, and you've helped me so much. I congratulate you and wish you another 9! Jamie

Today, My dad got the results from his 2nd PET scan, and while we were all holding our breath, the doctor told us that the radiation and chemo were succesfull, and we got the cancer out of his lymphnodes!!! They are scheduling him to get his tumor removed next month!!! My question is now that his cancer is gone from the lymphnodes, and the tumor has shrunk to 1/4 the original size... will the doctors be changing the stage of his cancer? At dx, he was staged at 3B. Also, am I being to optimistic in thinking my dad might be beating this thing? It really seems like great news to me, and I hope that Im not setting myself up for dissapointment later... anyone with any expierence please write me back, for now Im gonna go soak in my happiness... P.S. Excuse the spelling errors,,, Im just to excited!!!

I feel so refreshed every time i come to this site... I try so hard to look at new posts, and respond to as many as i can, although i feel stupid half the time becuase you guys are so well edjucated on this cancer stuff, and I dont really have any answers only questions, which makes me feel selfish, because I feel like im taking more from this site than giving. I only hope that in the future i can help someone as much as you guys have helped me... Elaine, Connie B. Dean Carl, mhutch1366, and everyone else who have helped me through so much. You guys are my light at the end of the tunnel, Ive had so many PM's that I feel like Im taking up too much of your time with my silly questions. I know that some of you guys will have to look up my past posts to see who I am, but something you've said touched me in a powerful way, and I thank you for it... My dad had his pet scan yesterday, and we are so anxious for the results. I sat with my dad for a while today and talked about his whole situation, and he confidied in me that he was'ne really confident in the pat scan results coming out. He said that he dosen't feel that there is a good chance of his cancer being out of his lymph. I dont know if its just a feeling but he had said that he dosent want any more radiation just chemo cause it dosent hit him as hard, but were still hoping for the best... I am anyway. Thanks again for all your posts, replies, and PM's... you guys are the best Jamie

Hi everyone! I just thought that I would let everyone know that my Dad's team of doctor's just gave him some hope in his battle. Anyone familiar with my past posts knows that my Dad was given some false information at the beginning of his dx, and was let down pretty hard a few weeks ago... Well now it seems that if the treatments worked, and they were successful in getting the cancer out of his lymph., they will be doing an operation to rid him of his tumor also. They originally told him he was non-operable. He's finished a full round of chemo and radiation combo., and is finally starting to feel great again. He has a pet scan scheduled for next week, and we're all pretty nervous. Does anyone have any expierence with all of this? First he was Non-operable, then they said that now he may be! Does anyone know if there is a good chance of it being gone of the lymph.? Also, I keep hearing that if they open him up to operate, there's a good chance the cancer could spread when air hits it... is there any truth to that? Any feedback would help, thanks alot everyone!

Hi- I hope this can help. My dad was going through some tough eating times, and all that he seemed to be able to eat was soup, and pound cake. I guess all thats easy on his stomach. He eats what he can when he can, and usually smaller meals. Fruit and vegetables usually dont stay down. Hes pretty much living on pound cake. At least its something that tastes good. Try that, you never know! Jamie

I truly can't say enough about you guys! Its been very hard for me to accept all of whats going on, but talking about it does help. You are all wonderfull for replying to my posts, and I know my Dad will come through all of this. Hes not a quitter. I guess right now what keeps me from screaming at him is knowing that even if he dosent care right now, I do and I get the feeling all you guys do too...maybe thats enough!? I will continue to pass on info to him, and hope he gets the care he needs and deserves. Thanks again everyone for caring enough to write back, Im sure Ill be posting again soon, I seem to be the most confused person on this board!

just thought id tell ya that were all hoping for the best for you, your fiancee, and of course your future mother in law! Good Luck!

Thank you so much everyone for being so helpful with all of this. My Dad isn't in good spirits, and everytime I bring up anything about LC he gets fusterated, and dosent want to talk about it. As Ive said in other posts, his doctor's aren't being helpful at all as far as giving us more information, and that seems to be fine with Dad, but not for me. The more info. I find out, and the messages I get from you guys make me see that he should be getting more information, and maybe even more attention from his Dr.'s. The problem is that he dosent seem to want anymore info, and truly dosen't seem to care. His additude has changed so much since finding out that he was not a canidate for surgery. It seems that now he feels like he's done for. Ive tried to give him survivor stories, and all he seems to do is find the low points in them... like telling him that someone has survived years with at his stage, and then he says something like "Yea, 6 years of Chemo, that's just what Im looking forward to". Im really at a loss here. He told me today that he was just really depressed and didnt want to talk about it anymore. Is this normal? Im sure it is, I cant imagine being in his shoes, and I cant understand. Ive tried to lead him to this website, and told him all about it, and he says its not for him.... what to do? How long can I let him go with this additude? Its not helping anything, and I feel like so much more could be done. He's only 49 and he says that he cant see prolonging chemo if this round dosent work. I think, he thought surgery was going to be his "cure all" in this. Its only been about 7 weeks since dx, and already I feel like hes giving up. Any advice on how to handle this would be much appreciated, from caregivers, survivors,... anyone. Again thanks a bundle on all the replies, since my Dad wont talk, I feel like I get to vent on here, and it helps me more than you know. Just getting replies to my posts makes me feel great.

Hi Elizabeth,,, your post sounds like mine! My dad too just got diagnosed IIIB. all this is new to me. im not sure about alot of his stats, just thought id let you know that someone here is in your situation! if you ever need to talk feel free to PM me. Seeing is were in the same boat, maybe you can answer some of my questions, or maybe i can answer some of yours! Tell your Dad to stay strong! Jamie

I too want to say welcome! Ive found alot of comfort in this message board, and hope that you will too! Stay Strong & Healthy!....Jamie

I wish the best for you and your family... dont ever give up!

My dad has IIIb LC. His doctors havent given us much information, and all this is pretty new. Quick situation info... Dx 2/5/04, IIIB, some lymphnode involvment (doctors didnt say how much), non operable no signs of cancer otherwise. PET scan shows "something lit up in neck" but doctors not concerned. My question is for anyone who can tell my why my dad is inoperable. Im pretty confused. Originally they told us the goal was to shrink his grapefruit sized tumor with chemo and radiation, and go from there. Monday they said it had shrunk in half! Great news or so we thought. My dad then asked about surgery, and they looked at him like he was crazy, then informed him he was never a canidate for surgery! He said he felt like he was slapped in the face with cancer again! Here he thought (and so did I) that he could beat this,,, and now things again look bleak. Anyone who can fill me in? Like i said, This is all really new to us . Jamie