MJ Posted November 16, 2004 Share Posted November 16, 2004 hi everyone, i was wondering if anyone else had this experience. i still haven't had a good cry since my mom passed, and i don't feel a great amount of sadness either. i know that i miss her incredibly, but in some ways, i felt that i was already losing my mom throughout the end of her illness, so i already had time to miss her while she was here (does that make sense?). i spent 24/7 with her during her last weeks (and i was basically by her side for the duration of her illness; a little over a year), and i slept by her side-literally curled up next to her in the hospice bed at home-for the remaining days. but i had good cries throughout her illness, so i haven't really had to sob after she passed. even on the day of her passing, i didn't feel much connection to her body. i told her thank you and that i loved her, kissed her on the forehead and let go of her hand. but that was it. my brother, on the otherhand, couldn't get away from her (he had to be physically taken out of the room). even on the day of the funeral, he had a hard time when they were closing the casket (my dad too), but i didn't. i kind of felt that once she passed, her body was just that -- a body, but i could feel her presence everywhere around me. i don't know if i am making any sense. anyway, i'm just afraid that that good cry is going to hit me out of nowhere, and i feel ill prepared for it (if and when it's coming). i think that i am just too busy trying to take care of my dad now too, and i have been having some issues with my brother/sister-in-law (loooong story), so i haven't had the energy to cry. anyway, i was just curious about others' reactions. thanks for listening. God bless, mj Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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