mamasbabygirl Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Mom got released from the hospital on Thursday and is back at the nursing home where she looks really good. She feels pretty good, although her skin is a mess everywhere. I'm sure you guys konw hat I mean when I say she looks like she has been abused for months. She has color in her face and is talkative. SF went to St. Louis for the weekend to visit family, so John and I did one of our raids late last night bringing her coffee and a heater. I have been depressed all week, even though I should be ecstatic and feeling very proud I know. My mom got up and dressed for therapy yesterday only to be refused at the door bc insurance denied our appeal again. So, I took out some of my frustration on the very pompous case manager at the insurance who told "I can't help you" 4 times, interrupting me. I went on and on about how mom has had the response from the chemo, radiation and surgeries they paid for and now her Drs. both recommend therapy so that she can at least roll in bed or wipe her butt when she comes home. I am starting a new appeal and will be contacting the Department of Insurance MOnday. It's sickening. On a brighter side, John and I stopped by our new house yesterday and they have started framing the basement, so I am counting down the weeks. We hope it will be done on about a month and them mama gets to come home. I love her so much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindy0519 Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Lori, Sounds like you Mom is doing remarkable well! Hopefully this will be a trend that will continue for sometime to come. This whole thing with the insurance company just sounds horrible! Its terrible that they seem to act like the are God and should not have to listen to what anyone else says (even the doctors for that matter). I hope you find some justice for you Mom soon. In the meantime is there another way to get her therapy? Maybe with assistance from one of the places that helps cancer patients financially? Just a thought. I remember how exciting it was to see that first little bit of framing go up on our house a couple years back. Congratulations! It will be a wonderful "home" for your family! Your doing great thing and your Mom (and family) are very blessed to have you!!!! Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamasbabygirl Posted April 22, 2006 Author Share Posted April 22, 2006 Cindy, That is actually a really good idea. Mom and SF have assets though, so I doubt they will get any help. We guess that mom will need 24 hour care when she comes home, so the costs will be astronomical. The nusing home is 7k per month and that does not include medicine or ancillary stuff. At my house, she will gett a home health care nurse probably 3 times a week, so to pay an aide will be around 16 dollars an hour, about the same as the nursing home I guess. If mom didn't go to the bathroom like every 15 minutes (no exaggeration), we wouldn't need so much help. It takes me about 15 minutes to get her clean each time and she wakes up about 3 or 4 times each night to go as well. Sometimes I wonder if she should have a catheter when she comes home. Also, they give her like 3 stool softneners a day, so I am hoping she can get by without that. It's a shame that she is such a mess down there and that is the main pain she is having right now. I am so ready for this house to be done... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linda661 Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Lori: I am so glad your mom continues to improve and your new house is beginning to take some shape -- good news always helps these days. Hopefully the state insurance office is gonna' have a solution on the insurance mess -- riding the healthcare roller coaster is hard enough without those kinds of issues to deal with. Sounds like your cost-outlook for where you're at now and home care prospects is the same as in my neck of the woods. Take care. Hugs, Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shineladysue Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Hi Lori, All of this sounds good for your mom. She is a remarkable woman and so are you. I know I keep telling you that, but you have been amazing through all of this. If you ever wonder what you can do, just look back at what you have done. It is no wonder you feel a bit of depression right now. You have been through an incredible amount of emotional stress. Take care. Everything is sounding better. Love, Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ry Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 So glad you posted an update. I think of you and your mom often. She's been through so much. You are such a great advocate for her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamataca Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 I am always amazed by what your mom is able to do. Taking care of mom and building a house? No wonder you are wiped out. Recognizing the depression and naming it are important, and it sounds like you are working through it. Rememeber to take care of yourself while you are taking care of mom! Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dadstimeon Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Glad your mom is doing better, she deserves it with all she has been through. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Glad your mom is improving. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treebywater Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 (((Lori))) So glad your Mom is doing better. It is OK to not feel "up" right now. You've been through so much, it's no wonder your emotions are still reeling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindi o'h Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Had to chuckle just a bit at Kelly's remark about you being wiped out. Sounds like both you and Rocky are. Give 'em hell at the ins. company. What a hassle though. Don't know how you find time to sleep, girl. Good news about the house. Sorry about the blues, Lori. Your emotions have been all over the place recently. It might just take a little time for the chemicals to re-balance after all the work they have been doing. love to you and Rocky. Cindi o'h Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamasbabygirl Posted April 22, 2006 Author Share Posted April 22, 2006 I love you guys, I really do. It's nice to be with people who can appreciate just how special my day was... John and I busted mom out of the nursing home. We went for a ride, got ice cream in the van, even took her IN to see the new house. She is such a go getter I tell you. Mind you, she has NO strength and is very heavy right now from the steroids/water and she put up with John and I tugging and pushing her body that has been through soooooooooo much. Our backs may be hurting tomorrow, but it was worth it. We laughed, we giggled, we sang, we were NOT stressed bc of SF (he is in St. Louis this weekend). We were free and it was very good for my heart. John's so awesome with all of this. He pushes me beyond my limits and fears. I feel proud, damn proud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shineladysue Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Oh Lori, If ever I need someone to take care of me, I would pray they would be JUST LIKE YOU!!! Love, Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MalouDP Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Lori: You should be able to let your mom do a little exercise. Just ask her to lift her arms up and down or raise her legs up and down while she is in bed or sitting on the chair. Every little bit help to raise her strength. When Thomas was in rehab, every time he was awake, I put hin on the chair and we do our own exercises. If I depended on those PT or OT workers, he probably is still in bed today. And all his kids and grand kids take turns in giving him foot massage every time they visited him. Also make sure you get your mom those Olay wipes for her face, it doesn't need any rinseng and keep her skin nice looking. Take Care and God Bless. Love, Malou Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamasbabygirl Posted April 22, 2006 Author Share Posted April 22, 2006 Thanks for the great advice Malou. It is up to us to get her up and keep her motivated and exercising. Well, apparently it is bc insurance won't cover it. John and I were laughing about how muscular we'll be... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MilliBr1 Posted April 23, 2006 Share Posted April 23, 2006 So happy to hear your mom is doing better. I'm sure she loved her day out with you. You are an awsome daughter! I agree with Malou, when mom was in rhab I took in 1lb hand weight for her to use while she was lying in bed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carleen Posted April 23, 2006 Share Posted April 23, 2006 Lori, I don't have much to add here but I did want to tell you that I think you are amazing. Your love for your mom is boundless and so apparent. You are a wonderful daughter and caregiver. I am very happy to hear that you and mom had a great day, and a happy and stress free weekend. Praying there will be many many more, and I look forward to celebrating in them with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maryanne Posted April 24, 2006 Share Posted April 24, 2006 Hi Lori, I was looking for an update from you and walla here it is. I am thrilled you mom has come such a long way and I am so F-in mad that the insurance company is screwing you over. How horrible especially when you know how much this could help her. But you are great, you don't give up. You get things done one way or the other. Just want you to know that continued prayers are sent to you mom. Keeping my fingers crossed you get better results from the insurance. Glad you SF gave you a break and went away for a little while take care sweetie...glad your house is coming along also. You have to send pics when it is completed. Maryanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mskim Posted April 24, 2006 Share Posted April 24, 2006 YAY for you Lori... Hugs, Kim Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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