Will the fear go away?????

[dscherer]

I hate that cancer can cause so much fear. From the day my mom was diagnosed my life changed. I think about cancer everyday and I hate that it has that much power!!!

My mom is doing well she has started her PCI. WHat I hate is the worry. I am afraid to get to excited when we get good news because I am afraid that in a heart beat that will change.

I don't want to live everyday waiting for the rug to get pulled out from under me again. I know our journey is new but does this feeling ever go away?

Does the fear go away? I don't want cancer to have control.

I am hoping you get to a point when I can "relax" just a little.

Well thank you all for listening. My prayers go to all who fight this disease and their family's.

I want more then anything to wake up tomorrow and turn on the news and see breaking news "CURE FOUND" I pray that is soon!

Sorry for rambling,

Dana

[Andrea]

You will hear a lot of different opinions. I am kind of known throughout all circles as Ms. Neurotic USA Worry is my middle name.

For me the worry was soooo fierce at first. Every day I waited for bad news. To this day I think about cancer every every day. I never thought I could have a happy moment again. I do have to say though that over time you get more used to your "new normal" and we have found happy times that we never thought we would ever find again.

The fear and anxiety especially increases during test times, but you will just start to get used to your new normal in time.

[ztweb]

Oh, I know EXACTLY what you are feeling, and I have been that way so many times. I always say that I feel like I am waiting for the ball to drop. Every day I pray for the peace we all need...all of us who suffer from being hit by the cancer wave.

I can say...the further we get into remission, the less I worry, but then something will come across this board or elsewhere, and then I think, "Oh gosh...I should be worrying." Stupid, I know, but real.

Blessings to you,

Jen

[RandyW]

How do you want to spend the time Worrying or enjoying being with each other. I know how you feel. Have been there more times than I can count. kinda wish i could go back to it. Its going to be okay. Breathe in and out. Make the most of what you can of things. Sending Hugs and sayin prayers for a sunny tomorrow RandyW

[myagle2]

all I an add at this point, is enjoy your time together now, because now is what counts, good luck, and try to stay strong in your path.! Mary

[kaneohegirl]

for me it hasnt gone away... I tend to push things away or box them up so everyso often my box gets full an I breakdown....the fear for me is always there I just try not to let it run my life.... an Im not even the one fighting... I really wonder what is going thru my Dads mind... but he wont talk so I have no clue.

[Sis]

Dana,

Never apologize for rambling. That's why all of us are here...to listen. Please try to stop anticipating. It just causes worry. I spent WAY too much energy on that activity and it's not a worthwhile cause. Try to take one day at a time. Cherish the victories, attack the challenges. This is a new lifestyle which we hate to be a part of, but with a lot of support, we can cope. Ellie

[missyk]

Worry is a HUGE part of this journey at the beginning. Cancer is always on your mind, the ever-present companion to everyday life.

It DOES get to be less noticable, though, as time goes on. You'll find times when you've gone a whole day and NOT thought about it!! You'll eventually get to where the good news is just that...good news. There are ups...and, unfortunately, there are downs. But isn't life that way anyway?

Just remember...hope is there for YOU, too. Hope that tomorrow brings a day when the worry for your mom is on the back-burner and you forget for a moment that there IS a "new normal".

Much love and many prayers...

[lc46]

When my Mom was first diagnosed I cried all the time and worried everyday that she was going to die. That was 9 months ago this month and now I feel this is our new normal and we just have to accept whatever comes our way. I feel we have 2 choices everyday when we wake up. We can look @ life with a positive outlook or negative-I choose to be positive-I think it has helped my Mom immensely. I am her biggest advocate, researcher, story teller. My Mom knows her prognosis but I have never read her one negative story that I have come across-only the positive ones. My daughter and I take my Mom down everyday for her brain radiation and draw big bright colorful flowers on the Drawing board that is there for the kids-and I put a little positive note on there-I think the people in the waiting room like it-and I like to think in some way it brightens their day.

Anyhow that is just my thoughts this morning.

Take Care

Dar

[Leslie]

Dana--

God, can I relate...the fear, the worry, the sadness, and (at times) the anger can just be overwhleming. I am finding that not only is the cancer unpredictable--but so are my emotions...

The fear and worry are constantly with me...I find myself thinking about cancer and my dad all of the time... Last weekend, my husband and I went to visit some friends and their baby--and I spent the rest of the afternoon in tears, worried that my dad might never see his own grandchildren. The feelings are so painful--and so intense. It is really hard to find ways to soothe myself.

I am finding that when I have a good cry it can be really helpful and sort of calming...and I also find that when I talk to people who are also going through this, and realize that I am not alone and that my feelings are entirely normal, it also helps.

I wish you peace and strength today. Remember, your mom is here today. She will be here tomorrow. Even before cancer, we didn't have any guarantees beyond that in our lives. Stay in the moment. I apologize for all of the cliches--but I truly believe that focusing on these things is the only way we get through this.

Best,

Leslie

[beat it]

I completly understand and can relate. We have been dealing with Anxiety attacks and now an ulcer with my MIL. It has caused me to dig into more research as to why this is happening on top of the cancer. What we have found has changed those medical issues.

The POWER I dont believe is in the cancer. But rather in our very own mind. We simply dont use them to our own benifit much and dont even realize what we are doing.

I would offer if you are realy concerned with worry and fear of the situation and it is taking away from the time you have with her, pick up a new DVD on the market, its a documentary on our thinking processes. Its called "The Secrect" by Rhonda Byrne it is currently the number one seller of DVD's in America, also on CD. It IS NOT boring and has COMPLETELY changed my life and way of thinking after repetitive listening to it.

I hope you find the peace thru your thoughts to enjoy your time with all your loved ones. I have learned to do this so much better by using these new principles in my life. Interestingly enough my MIL has had a remarkable turn around recently from nothing more than the power of how she was thinking about her situation (she watched this too), people not immediatly in the know have seen a dramatic change in her as well. The POWER isnt in the cancer, rather your MIND. In my opinion.

Just wanted to offer to you what we have discovered that is working for us.

Beat it!!