Nothingness

[Sheri]

I'm not sure that's a word, but I'm now convinced that is what death brings us. My Dad would have gave me a sign if there were some sort of afterlife.

I spent an hour at his site tonight with rain pouring down my face and his dog crapping at my side.

I realized we may never have the answers to our insipid questioning of life.

[ladybug]

I'm sorry for your pain. I lost my dad too and I've felt the way you do. But, I keep coming back to that none of us will every truly know what happens when we die until we die. I have hope that my dad is somewhere and is still connected to me in some way. I definately talk to him practically every day. If he's out there somewhere or not, it makes me feel better anyway. Sorry for your bad day, it does just suck all around to lose someone you love so much. Peace. Michele

[RandyW]

my thoughts and Heartfelt prayers go out to you SHeri. I wish I knew what to say to make everythign all right but for Now Hugs thoughts and prayers for some peace and tranquility today..

[J.C.]

Hope you get better days and

maybe some answers to your

questions or some sign that

your father is around you.

Jackie

[Leslie]

Sheri--

I do not believe in afterlife either--but I am finding that death is more complicated than nothingness...

I don't think that my dad is living on in some afterworld--but I do feel him living on within me. I hear his voice in my head. I find myself thinking about how he might handle a situation--or what he would say to me if I told him about certain things in my life.

When my mom, brother, and I are together we imagine how he would respond to certain things and all of the funny things he said and did. He still makes us laugh.

I miss him desperately.

He's definitely not here anymore. But it's not quite nothingness either....

I wish you peace and strength today.

Best,

Leslie

[teriw]

Sheri,

Wishing you a sense of comfort.

Sometimes I think people make a mistake in looking for signs from their loved ones who have passed (seems an odd thing for me to say after my recent post, but I firmly believe this). My Bill did that for a long time when his mum died. I can't say he ever lost hope in life -- not at all, but he was always waiting for and wanting a sign. One night a year or more after she passed, he had a dream that brought him comfort, and he stopped looking after that.

I do absolutely believe in eternal life, but I still suffer depression and doubt sometimes. I often find I get the greatest comfort when I open myself up more to those around me who are still here.

Never forget, Sheri, your dad is alive in you. I look at my beautiful step-kids, and I see Bill. I see pieces of him in each of them. It makes me sad, it brings me comfort, and gives me a sense of awe all at once. What did your dad love? Explore that a bit. What kind of music did he enjoy? Buy some and listen to it. Find him in your everyday.

I'm sorry for what you're going through.

[Welthy]

(((Sheri)))

I understand your pain and am sorry. I have a complete faith in a Heaven through Christ, so of course have different feelings about the afterlife.

Regardless of any belief system, I don't think that not having a sign is an indication of nothingness. When my Husband passed, I told him it was okay to go and never look back. I wanted him to be happy and not see our grief. I think that he is enjoying eternity. Although I had no need for a sign, I experience the same doubts as everyone. Sometimes I could kick myself in the *ss for telling him not to look back and often wish for something to tell me he's okay. Bottom line is the lack of signs doesn't mean the end of existence.

This world and universe is too complex and not happenstance to think that it dissolves into nothingness when death occurs. Just think of your Father enjoying himself in another place where his happiness is paramount. As others have said, he lives in and through you every day on the earthly plane.

Hugs,

Welthy

[kamataca]

Sounds like a rough night, Sheri. I hope you found some peace today. You aren't alone. We are here, we get it, and we care!

Kelly

[ztweb]

Someday you may realize that even that crapping dog may have been the sign! There are so many here who have been fortunate enough to get those signs, while others are still searching.

Be open to it. It might still come.

Blessings,

Jen

[wondermom]

I am sorry you are so down. I know how hard it is. I am one that believes in heaven and an afterlife. It is what gets me through each day. I have to believe that we will be together again. When it became clear that my mom was going to pass on, I wanted so badly to tell her to please give me a sign when she got to heaven that she was okay. But I didn't. I didn't ask her to do that because I didn't want to be disappointed if I didn't get my sign. Any number of things could be considered a sign. It just depends on how you take it. My mom loved hibiscus plants. She and my dad had planted some in her garden shortly before she got very sick. When we got home after she died, the hibiscus flowers were blooming! It might have been just a coincidence but I choose to believe it was a sign that she was now at peace. I am still waiting for her to come to me in a dream and tell me heaven is wonderful but I am not going to hold my breath. I just have to believe she is in a better place. Sorry, I hope this didn't seem like I was trying to change your beliefs. I kind of rambled on more than I intended to. Whatever you believe is what is right for you. I just hope you can find some kind of peace. I hope better days are ahead for you.

Jill

[Sheri]

Thanks everyone. Teri, I actually did play some of his music as loud as I could on the drive home. And Jen, this just cracked me up!

"ztweb"]Someday you may realize that even that crapping dog may have been the sign! Jen

I'm still laughing. As soon as I parked the car "Hotrod" ran right to my Dads resting place and crapped right at the head of the grave. I was so disgusted, I picked it up with my bare hand and threw it over the fence. Never thought that could have been a sign . I do know, my Dad would have laughed about it.

When I was out there, I was screaming at my Dad to give me an obvious sign! I wasn't falling for bunnies, crickets or butterflies it would have to be something really unique. Maybe I'm just making it too hard on him. This made me think of a possible other sign. I came into work to get some stuff caught up on Martin Luther King Day. I also planned on meeting a couple of clients. Well when the client's kids came in they gave me a couple of fully bloomed Dandelions. It was four degrees outside and had been in single digits for about a week. I asked them where they got them and they said right there out in the yard.

No, my Dad and I didn't have any special thing for Dandelion's but maybe that was a sign. Thanks everyone for all the replies, I know you hurt too and maybe someday, I can return the support.