cindy0519

Deepest sympathy to you and your family. May God hold you all close and grant you peace. Cindy

Sounds amazing Lori - just like your mom! Hope the days are passing gently for you and you are coping well as you begin this new leg of your journey. Thinking of you and wishing you peace, Cindy

Oh boy - I feel the raw emotion of every word of your post as I could have written 99.9% of it myself less than 4 months ago. When my Dad finally agreed to Hospice care (he too was vomitting and unable to eat/drink) he was admitted to a hospice in patient facility to be "stablized" - hoping to come home after a few days. Hospice gave him a cream of several anitnaseau meds mixed together that was applied to the inside of his wrist that was VERY effective! It is incredibly hard to face the fact that our fathers who our whole lifes have seemed so "unsinkable" are bought by LC to being dependant on someone else for even the simplest of daily activities. Just heartbreaking!!! Even harder to face head on the reality that someone that we love so much is facing limited days...just hurts so damn much that it seems impossible to even let yourself think about it, even for a moment. During Dad's first days in hospice I was full of fear (of the known, of the unknown and the reality that death was approaching, much sadness and hidden tears. I silently bargined with God even while knowing that His will was being done. As Dad began to become more stable a sense of peace and acceptance somehow took over and we had some amazing days..just truly taking in and savoring every moment we had together, feeling all the emotions and just loving each other as if there were no tomorrow (for silently we all knew our tommorows together were limted). I know how hard this point of the journey is.... I am so sorry that you are finding yourself at this point. I wish your family peace and pray that hospice is as much a blessing for your Dad as it was for mine! (((HUGS))) Cindy

truly at a loss for words as them seem so very inadequate right now. May God hold you all in the palm of his hand and bring you peace/comfort in the days ahead. My deepest sympathy, Cindy

YIPPEE!!!! Hope you are both able to linger in that meadow together very soon!! Your Lucie is without a doubt a heck of a fighter and has an amazing support system to cheer her on. Continued prayers for you both! Cindy

Grace, I have a friend who went through this too...very sad and tragic! It was so difficult for our friends (and their families),so many emotions and so little answers.... I will definately be praying for your family. May God hold you all close in the days to come and may you find comfort in each other. I'm so sorry, Cindy

.....so very, very sorry to see this Lori. What an amazing team you and Rocky were during this battle, truly inspirational to many! Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I pray that God holds you close in the weeks to come and that you find peace and comfort. My sincerest condolences, Cindy

Thinking of you and Rocky today. We haven't hearad anything this week... praying that things are going well, that Mom is not in pain and that you all are finding peace and above all LOVE in these most difficult of days. God Bless and keep you all Lori. (((HUGS))) Cindy

Somehow I feel like this is almost as hard to read as I am sure it was for you to write .... Please know that we are praying for Lucie and for your family. May God hold you all exceptionally close during this time! Cindy

((((Robyn)))) No words of wisdom for you... just lots of understanding and wishes for comfort coming your way. Know that you are not alone - after almost 3 months I can only say that I am at a point where I believe that the pain doesn't go away ever - we just learn to somehow live with it and incorporate it into everyday life. I understand 110% and cry with you. Wishing you peace! Cindy

Such sad news. My sympathy and of course prayers for her family and friends. May God bring you all peace and some much needed comfort. God Bless, Cindy

(((Lori)))...leave me at a loss for words that seem adequate. Just know that there are a lot of people with you in spirit, myself included! Prayers continue for your mom, you and your family. Cind

Lots of prayers for Lucie and for you! Wishing her a quick and full recovery! Cindy

Sorry to read this after the fact.... the tribute to your mom was beautiful (both verions ). I can only image how difficult the day was for you - I hope it passed gently and you were able to really "celebrate" your mom and your wonderful memories. God Bless, Cindy

May God keep and comfort you in the tough days ahead. My deepest sympathy to you and your family. Cindy

Ah Lori, Your post always make my heart melt and my eyes flood with tears! Cling tightly to these precious moments and every ounce of that hope that you are so wonderful at expressing! Glad to hear that SF suprized you with his response to treatment and you didn't have to "do battle" with him over it. Praying that the antibotics help and Rocky continues to WOW us all for a long time to come! My thoughts and prayers are with you! Cindy

Andrea, I for one do not think you are paranoid and if you are I think that much of my family can join the group ! Since Dad's diagnosis and death, my sisters (two of are non-smokers/one is a smoker) and I have open and frequently discussed testing options and how strongly the fear of getting LC grips us sometimes. We were all raised around people how smoked constantly and I for one am scared stiff about the possibilities of lung cancer. I find it kinda odd that my sister who is the smoker (and an RN) really isn't all that openly concerned while myself and my other sister have gone as far as looking for testing sources. My non smoking sister lives in MD and found a place that will do a full body PET scan for a very reasonable price. We have seriously discussed going to do it together next time I visit. So the only difference between you and I is that you are doing it and not just talking about it! I say GOOD FOR YOU!!! I'm glad that you are going for the XRay.. my personal opinion of late is "never too safe and peace of mind is worth just about any price". There are indeed othes out there who share your same fears...you are not alone by any means!!! Cindy

Sorry to be adding this so late... Many, many prayers for comfort, peace and love as you find ourselves in the last precious moments of this journey! May God hold you and your family close and give you peace! Thinking of you, Cindy

Amazing, just amazing! Prayers for you all, Cindy

(((Lori))) sending gentle hugs and warm thoughts to surround both of you brave souls on this journey! I understand how very, very difficult this is and share your tears. I'm so sorry! God Bless and keep you all, Cindy

(((Andrea))) Waiting is SO VERY hard! It took 3 agonizing months for them to finally arrive at an offical diagnosis for my Dad and I can still recall how very, very difficult it was on our family. All the fears and "what if's" are haunting and so hard to avoid no matter how hard you try. While this is indeed easier said than done - TRY - to take one step at a time. Sometimes even baby steps are called for Prayers for your family during this wait!! Cindy

Your post brought me to tears for more than one reason..I can relate on SO many levels that just pierce my aching heart! You refer to putting your life on hold and not regretting one single moment and feeling honored to have cared for her and to have been cared about by her ... to all of this I shake my head in agreement as the tears roll! I too felt exactly this same way about my Dad. I often said to people who would remark about my "scarifices" during his journey, "he is my Dad, he has cared and scarified for me my entire life - how could I not now do the same. Besides caring for him is not a scarifice,I feel truly honored to be able to do so." I meant this with all my heart and know that you do too and so does your sweet mama!! Even though mama may be in a coma Lori, I believe that what they say about hearing being the last thing to go is true! I know that I could talk to Dad and he would try so very hard to respond (I could watch his eyebrows raise and lower as if he were verbally responding). His breathing would slow and tension would dissappear from his face when I would talk to him. Talk to her Lori, tell her how much you love her and are proud of her courage in this battle..she will hear you and it will do you both good. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you travel this painful path. I pray that God holds your family close and grants you peace as you begin this new leg of your journey. Cindy

My deepest sympathy! Losing a parent is very hard. No matter how much we are glad for them that they no longer have to battle the pain.... its never easy to loose someone you love so much. Peace be with you during this most difficult of times, Cindy

Lori, I recall reading in several cancer related books that the drugs ect associated with cancer treatment can cause dental problems and that one should consult with thier dentist on a very regular basis during treatment. This being said I suppose a tooth gone south is somewhat to be expected. Certainly mom's oncologist and the dentist should be able to determine the best route to resolve her tooth pain. I can say from experience (unfortunately) that an infected tooth left untreated can cause a world of problems.. so unless it is just really risky I think getting the tooth pulled is certainly the best thing. Wanted to comment on the lovenox -- my Dad was on this drug (and about 11 others for pain, heart rate regulation, blood pressure and two inhalers) to prior to being admitted to the hospice house. I do know that they said they would continue to get any meds related directly to his cancer and when we went over the Excel spreadsheet that I kept of his meds - there were many they felt were not related (all the heart meds and blood pressure were ones I can specifically recall discussing -- and we did "discuss" them..lol). They said they would discuss his meds with the hospice doctor and there "might" be some that they would continue to provide even though they were not directly related to his cancer (in their opinion). After all of these discussions, they discontinued all of his medicines but pain control meds and the stool softeners. Not sure if this was something that they do as a routine or if it was something that they discussed with Dad while we were not there (which was next to never). They did tell us that if Dad wished to continue the other meds the choice was his and we could bring them in ...but he chose not to continue them. My advice is to talk to them about your concerns. Maybe ask specifically about the Lovenox and explain why you feel is it part of her cancer treatment. One of the nurses that we had (our favorite one actually) told us that sometimes they do just go ahead and order meds such as Lovenox if the patient wants to continue to take it, so I know it isn't totally out of question. Good Luck to you and Mom ~ you both are amazing!! Cindy

Thoughts and prayers being sent for a speedy recovery!! Cindy