-Cheryl-

Hey Folks, I got the pictures from Katie and Rick's Bash developed yesterday, and had a CD made. I will try to get them posted onto the site after I return from my doctor's appt. I even got the elusive Ms OkDebi captured on film! She and all of you looked great. Look for them soon, Cheryl

Hell Everyone, I got a letter today from the HR Director full of lies to cover his own butt about this FMLA business! My direct boss told me yesterday, that he wanted to keep me, and would do whatever it took. I feel so deflated and depressed. I just don't have the energy to fight. I am afraid to miss work, because I may need those days. I tell everyone that "I am fine", and they say,"I would never even know you had cancer!" I try so hard to fit in, be normal. I got a thousand dollar donation from Wal*Mart today for our Thanksgiving dinner. My friends, who own a radio station asked if "I knew anyone in need of Thanksgiving dinner?" So, now we are up to 600 people and donations from all over town! I guess my point is, I want really bad to help people and feel useful, but I can't even help myself. The company I have worked so hard for, made it clear to me that I am disposable. I am really feeling sorry for myself gang. I HATE THIS DISEASE! I hate not knowing the future, lossing control and losing everything, being tired and in pain, being experimented on, perceived as helpless, unable to do what I used to do, never feeling safe again, and even asked if I am mentally competent....the list goes on and on. On a positive note, I am stable, still working, and I did get a thousand dollars from Wal*Mart today! I do have my license and can solicit myself on some street corner if I need to (Shame on you all), I meant like Lucy from the Snoopy cartoon offering psychological help! Ha! Cheryl

I'm burning one called "Bird of Paradise" right now. I find it so relaxing and it really makes the house smell wonderfull- I have four inside dogs I understand the plugins can catch on fire. What's a girl to do? Aresol sprays really iritate me most. I guess every thing has a health risk these days. Thanks Heather for the heads up. I suppose that candle I just ordered will make a nice Christmas gift. Ha! Wait...I can't give a gift that causes cancer? Cheryl

Paula, Wow, thank God you are not one of those people in denial. It does sound as if God has a plan for you.! Take your time and heal properly. Have a good Thanksgiving! Cheryl

Dean, May I say that we are blessed to know you! Congratulations! This is quite an event to be proud of. I'd say, the hardest battle is that against the demons of one's own will. God Bless, cheryl

Lisa, Ahmed isn't ready to die. May he continue to fight this disease. I am sending you prayers and good thoughts. Don't let his family intimidate you. I am so sorry they have not given you the support you need. Let your cyber family do that. Cheryl

Ken, I can remember how scared I was going into my surgery. So many unknowns. I had a mediastinoscopy to see if the nodes were cancerous in my mid chest. If they were not, then we would proceed with the surgery. They were, so I was closed up. I underwent chemo and radiation to shrink them enough for surgery. My surgeon took my r. mid lobe and part of my upper. I had no problem with my lung sealing. I don't see a bio, so I am not sure of your stage. I am sure the surgery will go well. I was back at work in 3 1/2 weeks. You can do this. Stay with us, this group got me through it, and will be there for you too. Cheryl

Irene, I welcome you to the board too. Don't just follow whatever advice your onc gives you. There is usually some kind of an incentive for doctors from these chemo manufacturers to utilize their products. I used first line chemos cisplatin/ VP16. It barely shrank the tumors, radiation did the trick though. The nodes that never lit up on my PET scan in my other lung, began to grow after about a year. I decided traditional chemo's side effects were pretty harsh, and aren't a cure. They can at best buy only time. That is why I recommend taking matters into your own hands. Research and check out trials. There have been some honest to goodness cures with vaccines. Even the newer chemos offer fewer side effects, which contribute to a better quality of life. Good luck and keep us posted. Cheryl

Dave, I had three tubes, wonder why? Those tubes didn't hurt as bad as the two in my ribs from the lung surgery. I can't believe you got to go home so quick!!! Glad you are home. I am keeping you and your family in my prayers. I bet you are feeling so much better with those puppies out of your chest. Sending you all cyber hugs and well wishes, Cheryl

Katie, I will get them developed this weekend to see what I've got. I will send them to you as soon as I get them developed. I remember Debi saying that you were making fun of her for standing behind people, because she brought them such bad luck.Ha! So, I think I got her alone! Hee Hee Cheryl

So glad for Steve! It gives us all great pleasure to hear of his stable disease! Enjoy! Cheryl

Hey Don, I am praying for great scans. I know Lucie is looking forward to the end. My chemo is scheduled to end Dec. 7th, I had chemo this week as a matter of fact. I tolerated it well I suppose. I worked all week, and even had training in Dallas. If Lucie is like me, she will be counting down the days. I may go on a vaccine trial. Side effects are suppose to be almost non-existent. I hope the results fare better. Give Lucie my best, Cheryl

So, glad David is doing well. He is in my prayers. Wish him well from the gang here. Cheryl

Sharon, You have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving, I am so relieved for you. Your Dad is something else. What a fighter! God Bless, Cheryl

Hey, I wanted to share this address and phone number with you all. Ned Adams RN, is the coordinator of the trials. The adress is 3535 Worth Street* Suite 302 Collins Bldg Dallas, Tx. 75246. Phone number is (214) 370-1870. The e-mail address: ned.adams@usoncology.com. There are other sites, maybe closer to you. However, we do have patients fly in for the trials. Cheryl

Joan, How tragic your Mom's death was. It is very unfortunate. Please accept my condolences. We have had several deaths on this board from bleeding. Did your mom have radiation along with the chemo? This could cause tissue damage and healing impossible. I am not a doctor, and there could be other reasons. I would suggest getting copies of notes from the procedure done. Good luck, and keep us posted. Cheryl

David and Karen, I fired off a prayer myself. I had a pericardial window, which was a cakewlak. The only thing that bothered me were the tubes coming out of my upper abdomen. It just wasn't natural. My sister and I had quite a bit of fun with all the tubes coming out of the wall plugged into me, till one of the nurses rushed in to see what was going on! Ha! I blamed it on my sister, who was dumfounded. Keep us posted on David's progress. Cheryl

Iguess all of us chemo patients are crazy, Huh? Sounds like since she can't prevent the pain with her magic, it has to be yoU. Some docs can't accept defeat. Cheryl

Thanks Katie, best of luck with your meeting with Dr. Numanaitis. What a great guy he is. He has twin boys, or so I am told. He is also an extreme outdoorsman, with a big sense of humor. He is pretty young to be where he is, and so intelligent. You can tell he is pationate about his work, and takes the time to spend with his patients. You would never take him for a doctor, because his demenor is down to earth and approachable. Most importantly, he hasn't lost ability to care about people. He will make you feel at ease Katie. He probably knows me, because of my trial CT2103, and I have pestered him about the upcoming trials-Ha! I hope your meeting is productive. I am sure he will be impressed with the site and you! The statistics of how often this site is visited will impress him alone. Keep us posted on your meeting. Cheryl

Yeah Rick and Katie! Yeah Telik!! This site gets how many hits Rick? People are noticing, and Reachers are giving back!!!! Cheryl

Dean, So good to see you on the board. I set a few bird feeders out myself. We put up two Purple Martin houses also. I have dozens of Barn Swallows nests, in which they back come year after year to reclaim their nests, as unsitely as people think their nests are. Ha! My neighbors practice target shooting BB guns at them. Makes me so mad! I can see God in everyone of those critters. It deeply moves me. Dean, I know you are opposed to any evassive treatment, but would you be opposed to a vaccine. It has literally no side effects. I am not sure where they are being held in your area, but it could actually slow down, if not cure the beast. Forgive me, I am 100 percent with you, on what ever decision you make. Please , I am not trying to offend you in any way. My Regards, Cheryl

Hello All, I met with DR. Nemunaitis today. He wants me to continue with CT2103 till a new vaccine trial is underway, which should begin enrolling next week and start in about a month. He doesn't know if the vaccine TGF-B2 trial will get underway in a month, but tere is another vaccine, called Epimmune HLA-2, that has been approved. Not everyone will qualify for it. Your blood can be checked to see if it has this gene. On some people a tumor antigen is present and triggered to fight the cancer. I hope I said that right. I will research it more. If anyone has heard of this, please share. Fay you may be one of those people whose body has this! Cheryl

Tami, "IT'S YA BIRTHDAY! IT'S YA BIRTHDAY! IT'S YA PARTY!! CElEBRATE IT!!! Poo on everyone. Pamper yourself. Treat yourself to having your nais done, a massage, a new outfit, a mini bithdaycake or a big one. Don't let those inconsiderate sour puses spoil your day. I want to help you celebrat another year of life! HIP HIP HURRAY for TAMI!!! Cheryl

Francine, It is like homecoming week to have you and Carleen post this week. You are deeply missed. I will be sure to say prayers for you both. What symptoms are you experiencing? Some could just be an old fashioned headche. Hoping that is all it is! Cheryl

I went back to work 3 1/2 weeks after lung surgery. I had a little plueral efussion due to treatment, but just stopped when necessary to catch my breath. About a year later I was back in the hospital to have a pericardial window put in. I was in the hospital two weeks, and back at work in another two weeks. I too walked everyday and believe that it does help lung capacity. I had a cold and took 4 days off. I recovered quick, but apparantly not fast enough. My work wants me to take FMLA. I'm out only one day a week cause of chemo, which ends Dec.7th? It has been a battle. How is your work about taking some extra time off due to the cold. Your immune system is compromised right now. Cheryl