(((Michelle))),
First of all , I want you to know that you are helpful to others here. You are so open and honest about your feelings and it is helpful to someone else who may be feeling the exact same way. I don't know anything about panic attacks, but I do know about suffering the loss and grief of losing a husband and soul mate. The fact that your lost your husband right here at the holidays makes it extra hard. Holidays are always hardest, I know that's how it is for me. I would, however, talk to your doctor about the panic attacks and how you are feeling because in some people certain drugs can magnify problems rather than help them. It could very well be that the meds you are taking to help may be a big part of why you are having the problems. Thinking of you Michelle. Keep in touch and know we care.
Hugs,
Sue