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My mom died


minnie

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Thank you all for respecting my feelings, or lack of knowledge about what I feel.

I spoke to my sister and she feels like what both her and I feel just might be 'normal.' (What is normal anyway?) After mom was diagnosed with brain mets, we both mourned the loss of our mother - at least her mental and physical characteristics - but she was still mom. But yet I still feel like I have not 'properly' grieved. How can things be so ironic?

Thanks again.

Minnie

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Dear Minnie,

Please know how sorry I am about your loss of your mother -- but you were there for her and that must have brought a lot of comfort to her. And, as so many have said, she doesn't have to go through all that pain and suffering any more, and she made the decision on her own and knew she had your and your family's support, all of which speaks to the great love and trust that you all had for and in each other.

Give yourself time -- time to have it all sink in, time to come to terms with it all, time to finally be able to mourn and to celebrate -- both very important things for you to do - mourning your mother's death,celebrating your mother's life. You know that she will continue to live on in your heart and mind; her knowledge of that must have eased her parting with you.

Ellen

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Minnie..

I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother. I can feel your love flowing in your posts. What a lucky woman she was to have your with her through her journey.

Speaking to "mourning" for the loss of her when the brain mets were diagnosed...i can understand where you are coming from. Though my mother is still in her battle i have mourned for her. I have mourned for the loss of the things that have changed and the things that might never be.

I suspect that the complete mourning process will take a little bit of time. I pray strength and love for you and your family during this time and as time passes.

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I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your mother. As everyone has already told you there is no right or wrong way to mourn. Just support each other with where you are at the moment. When my mother died many years ago I received an image of the journey that she took that I would like to share. It's what helps me to deal with death when I encounter it.

Our loved one is on a ship that begins to leave. We are on the shore waving frantically, saying good bye and crying because we will miss them so much. As the ship gets smaller and finally goes out of sight we go on with our lives never forgetting the one that we love. But you see the ship keeps sailing (I like to think of it as a cruise ship). As it gets closer to the other side there is another crowd. They are also waving frantically. They are crying out, "She's here! She's here!" They are also crying because it's been such a long time since they've seen her and they love her so! She will be there waiting for you when you go on your journey to the other side.

This may be an over simplified idea of things but it helps me and I hope that it might help you. My prayers are with you and your family.

God Bless us all!

Cheryl

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Hi Minnie,

My condolences to you and your family on the loss of your mom. I can relate as I buried my mom last Thursday.

My prayers go out to you for strength to get through these difficult times.

Peace be with you Minnie.

Sorry for your tremendous loss in your life.

Maryanne

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