nyka69 Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 There have been so many times over the last year when someone learns that my husband has lc that well-intentioned people say inappropriate things. TO MY HUSBAND: "Well at least you had fun while you were here." TO ME: "Do you think it's better that he will die slowly, or would it be better if he was hit by a bus." TO ME: "Well what are you gonna do now?" TO US BOTH: "OMG, my _______ died of lung cancer!" Yesterday, we went to a 7-11 in our old neighborhood. My husband hasn't been in there in 2 years. The man behind the counter recognized hubby and said "I haven't seen you in a long time! Wow, you lost lot of weight...are you okay?" My husband looked a little uncomfortable, and said "Well, not really. I have lung cancer." The man behind the counter gave him such an earnest look and simply said "I will pray for you my friend". I almost started crying right there in the middle of the store. It took a STRANGER to finally offer the right words. I guess there's something to the saying "the kindness of strangers." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasey Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 It is amazing, isn't it? A brand new acquaintance just a few weeks ago surprised me in the same way. Upon hearing I had lc, she simply said.....well, that's a bad one. Then immediately said ~ good for you for surviving. It really didn't matter to me HOW long I had survived ~ they were wonderful words to hear. God bless that 7-11 guy!!!!! Kasey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 I ran into a woman who used to work the Pharmacy counter at CVS where debs prescriptions were filled. Saw her many times with Cancer sucks button o, so... Never asked always prayed. have not seen her in a while and about 3 months ago, remember year and a half since Deb passed and probably year since I had seen her, There she is at Home Depot with hubby. IN REMISSION from Breast cancer. so we talked and I told her About Deb and She said she was sorry to hear that. Still have her in my LC prayers list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilyjohn Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 I met both kinds of people both before and after Johnny died. I really don't think they mean to be so insinsitive, they just don't know what to say but sometimes The worse one I met was Johnny's case manager. She was a cancer surviver. When she first met Johnny she just couldn't get over how well he looked during chemo. She told about all of the bad things she had been through, then on her way out the door she asked me "What are you going to do when he dies?" I wanted to slap her. I will always blame that attitude for playing a major part in his death. There are some people who just seem to know instinctively what to say in a situation. Those people are few but when we find one they are worth their weight in gold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 It just shocks me sometimes to know how STUPID and INSENSITIVE people REALLY CAN BE! DAH!! As Jay Leno would say, "IDOTS!" Pretty much says it all. I've been dealing with lung cancer for 38 years of my life, ever since my dad died from it 38 yrs ago, and then my mom, then my sister and now me. Just when I THINK I've heard it all, someone comes along and TOPS the last stupid remark about lung cancer. I know just how your feel. It's WORSE when it's your "friends" saying it. I've had that too. We just had a theard about things that people say to going on a couple months ago. I think it's in the Survivors Forum. Hang in there. Just think IDOTS when you hear stupid stuff. teeheeteehee. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzie Q Posted September 7, 2007 Share Posted September 7, 2007 Who says the best thing about 7/11 is the Slurpees? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ztweb Posted September 7, 2007 Share Posted September 7, 2007 I too will pray for you, my friend. Blessings to you... Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don M Posted September 7, 2007 Share Posted September 7, 2007 Nyka: I like the 7-11 guy. what a nice ending to your story. You both have my prayers. Don M Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted September 7, 2007 Share Posted September 7, 2007 Just think of the last offer of prayers, they will be said and will add mine to them. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teriw Posted September 7, 2007 Share Posted September 7, 2007 Oh my gosh, I so understand! Once when Bill really wasn't feeling all that great, he still insisted on attending a planned family gathering for our little great nephew. Partly for our family, but also just to get outside, enjoy a nice day at the park, etc. One of our relative's friends came up to chat to him. Out of the blue, he said, "it's all over the place." Bill said, "what?" "People dying of cancer," the guy said. Had he not been a friend of someone in our family, I can only imagine what Bill would have said back. Insensitive doesn't begin to describe it. Although I won't even repeat what a couple different medical people said to him -- they can be the worst. God Bless the sweet man in 7-11... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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