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My Friend Jim


jaminkw

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We send our best wishes for people's health and well being in different ways. Some of us pray in a traditional way, some of us send positive energy or vibes, etc. Whatever your style, please do it for my friend Jim. After he didn't return three calls while I traveled, I called a family member of Jim and learned he'd been in the hospital since the day after I left. Seems like he had/has some virulent form of staph. He's been on IV antibiotics and they've done all kinds of tests for other stuff, even a couple of MRI's because he's so out of it. He's Mr Body-Beautiful but had been losing weight for awhile. Now he's lost twenty more pounds since he was hospitalized! They were going to do a colonoscopy but he was two weak. Don't know what's happening there but I am so afraid he's going to join the cancer club. I love him but don't think he has a lot of will to survive so I don't want to even go there in my mind.

Jim's going home today in spite of how weak he is because they are hoping being home will improve his mental condition. I'm so afraid and won't be home until late Sunday. Keep him in your thoughts and prayers, please, just because he's my friend.

Judy in Orlando

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I talked with a friend of Jim's today and learned some disturbing news. He has brain lesions as identified by an MRI. They are telling me the lesions are from the staph infection. Has anyone every heard of brain lesions caused by a staph infection that has run rampant through the body?

They have scheduled Jim for an outpatient colonoscopy w/in the next couple of weeks that he was too weak to get while in the hospital. That added to the brain lesions make me suspicious they are looking for cancer. Remember, I got a run-away infection from a dental procedure shortly before I was diagnosed and I had it taken care of a lot sooner than Jim. But I think my experience is making me paranoid for him.

Judy finally in Key West

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There was a flicker of hope when Jim's friend said he sat up and fed himself on Sunday. He didn't sound great when I talked to him but better than when he was in the hospital. I talked to Jim again, however, onTue or Wed of this week. He didn't sound well. I called his niece to check on him today. She said she was just telling her mother she needed to call me.

I am devastated. Hospice is coming in. No one seems to be able to give me a definitive diagnosis. But Dr West said several days ago that one of several underlying causes of brain lesions (besides the staph which Jim was being treated for) is melanoma. I responded that I found that troublesome because Jim had a "spot" that kept recurring like my husband had years ago. My husband's was dx'd (skin cancer) and removed. Jim's niece said they biopsied Jim's (on his neck) and it was cancerous. She also said he has swelling of the brain.

The only other things I know are that the staph infection is starting to look better but now he has thrush and it appears it could be going to his throat. He complains his stomach hurts and those with him say he is obviously in pain. I'm so scared. I want to see him but am afraid that my immune system on chemo makes it unwise unless I go gowned gloved and masked (advice of RN daughter). I asked Jim the last time we talked if he wanted to see me gowned and gloved and masked and he said no. But that was when I thought he would be finished his antibiotics in less than two weeks and I could visit him then. Now I'm afraid there won't be time.

Thanks for letting me run on. Any suggestions?

Judy in Key West

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Prayers sent Iam sorry for all that Jim is going through. I know the word hopice is devestaging but they could be a godsent and he needs that care.

So sorry it has come to this. I hope they can make him comfortable.

My heart to to yours,

Maryanne :cry:

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Thanks Wendy, Kasey and Maryanne for your kind thoughts.

I am glad I stopped in briefly to see Jim on Saturday. I apparently hit the last time he sat up and and was fed. He seemed to know I was there but his responses were few and barely audible. I knew he was dying but no one told the family until yesterday. Of course, it was hospice. They said it could be as few as 24-72 hours.

I went yesterday and was able to climb into the king size bed and sit with him. I held his hand and talked to him for more than two hours. He would half open his eyes from time to time and even blinked a couple of times, but I'd be lying if I said there appeared to be any sign of consciousness. It was, nevertheless, somehow comforting to be with him and talk to him about the good times we had. I also tried reassuring him that he didn't need to be afraid. There are plenty of mothers waiting on the other side to help him. His mother (who he lost when he was seven) and my three mothers (long story) who I knew would look after him too.

On the selfish side, it was reassuring for all of us facing this horrible disease that people don't have to suffer at the end today. Hospice gave him morphine Saturday evening and the family has medicine to keep him comfortable and hospice's number to call if they need them.

Judy in Key West

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Judy, my heartfelt condolences on the loss of your friend Jim. It's wonderful that you were able to spend time with him before his passing. Though he couldn't respond, I'm sure he heard you and was comforted by your presence and the stories of your good times together. With much Aloha,

Ned

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