jdjenkins

Lori, My heart is breaking for you and your family. I remember all to well what it is like to watch a much loved parent pass away. Peace to you and your Mama. Denise

So very sorry for the lost of your Daddy. You were a wonderful daughter to him. He is free now from cancer. Prayers for your family. Denise

I'm so sorry you and your family have to go through this, it is so very hard. Your Dad gave you a very special gift today. You are so blessed to have shared that time together. I hope you have some time to make more memories. I'm crying now too. Denise

My Mom has her hip replacement surgery Monday morning. I'm hoping for no surprises and a swift recovery. She is in so much pain now she can barely walk. Please say a prayer for her. Thanks, Denise

Carleen, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with financial worries at a time like this. You should be just taking time to heal yourself. Have you considered refinancing your home. There are a lot of mortage products out on the market today. Some allow you to pay interest only for a few years. With some time you may be able to better afford your home. This would give you some time to grieve before making any major decision. Please seek the advice of a Mortage Banker before making any big decisions. I'm sure there is a way for you to stay in your home. Denise

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I pray for strength for you and your family. I hate lung cancer too.

Brandie, I'm so sorry you had to find this board, but I know you will find lots of support here. I encourage you to get another opinion. If you are having any doubts about the care your Mom is getting it is best to put them to rest now. Not sure why your Mom could not have radiation and chemo at same time. Dad had a brain met and had both at the same time. Maybe it has something to do with her collapsed lung. Keep being a such a strong advocate for your Mom's care. Denise

Today is my son's 9th birthday. It is the first one without Dad here to call him in the morning and sing Happy Birthday. Dominick had such a special relationship with Grandpa. They did so much together and are so much alike in many ways. Sometimes when I look at Dominick I can see my Dad. I know how badly my Dad wanted to live and watch him grow. I wasn't expecting this first to hurt so bad. You really never know when grief will hit you hard. Thanks for listening. Denise

Our hospice experience at the end of Dad's life was not what we had thought it would be like. Mom and I had thought that she would have stayed with us for Dad's final hours. Instead she had to run off to another client. She seemed in a hurry and very nervous. She was constantly either on her cell phone or her computer. When she left she left me with a bunch of drugs to give my Dad. Told me to give him morphine every two hours regardless if he needed it or not. I felt very uncomfortable giving him the morphine that often. I didn't want to drug Dad to death. I only gave it to him when he seemed to need it for pain or discomfort. As I look back now it would have been so comforting to have a nurse there to give the meds. I would have had more time with Dad and would not have been so worried about keeping track of times and meds we had given him. I guess no matter how it happens death of a love one is so heart breaking nothing would ever seem right. So sorry for your loss. I pray the Lord will give you strength on the days ahead. Keep coming her for support. God Bless, Denise

Hello, Your post reminded me so much of what we went through with Dad. He too became very depressed and did not want to go anywhere. My kids would say why does Grandpa want to just sit in his little yellow tv room all the time. I tried everything possible to get him engaged in life. Somethings worked a little, but he never truely enjoyed himself. I never saw that sparkle in his eye or smile on his face again. He did see a theropist for a while and he was on anti-depression meds. He was also on Ativan for anxiety which seemed to help the most. He also met with our church pastor quite often. He really seemed to get the most comfort from meeting with him. I tried to schedule activities that would not require much energy on his part. Getting him outside seemed to help with his mood. We went on a paddle boat ride, drives to small towns for lunch dates, drives to visit places he used to take me to when I was little, I would also have them over to my house for dinner a lot. I always stopped by with the grandkids. I never asked if he wanted us there we just showed up. Seeing the kids was good for him, it helped with his mood. I know it is so hard to see your parent so depressed. You feel so helpless. It is easy to fall into a depression yourself. Just keep trying anything, and appreciate the moments whens you get a glimpse of MOM again. It is so hard for us to understand what they must be feeling. We really can't blame them for being depressed. Denise

Dear Lori, I'm so sorry to hear this news. I wish there was something I could do to ease your pain. I understand how you are feeling. Just try and take one day at a time. Denise

I understand what you are feeling. Hold that little sweetie of yours even closer today and she will bring you some comfort. Denise

This is great news Jamie!!! I'm so happy for you and your family. Denise

Joan, Anytime my Dad had tumor growth his current chemo was stopped and he was put on a new one. I think that is pretty standard. Hoping the new plan knocks that beast down again for you. Denise

I'm with Katie, when can we take the test. I hope and pray this is the real thing. Denise

Great news, I'm so happy for you both!! Denise

Donna, I understand all to well. Just take one day at a time and enjoy every minute. Push all negative thought from your mind and enjoy the day together!!! Denise

You have a lot of really great idea here. We donated several cd players and a collection of cd's to the chemo unit at the UofM. We thought it might be nice for people receiving chemo to have music to listen to during treatment. We also released balloons on my Dad's birthday. We wrote messages to him on them. Be kind to yourself on this day, it is alright to feel sad and cry in your cherrios sometimes. Denise

Dear Kat, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your Father. I lost my Dad in January of this year and understand the great heart ache. Your pain must be double with your Mom sick as well. I pray for strength for you and your family. Life is so unfair at times. Keep coming to the board for hope and understanding. Denise

Hi Kim, So sorry to hear about your Mom. Reading your post brought back all the feelings I had when my Dad was diagnosis. He too shut down when it came to doctors appointments and relied on me to ask all the questions. My life became totally consumed with lung cancer research and doctors appointment. It takes some time to adjust, but you will. Just give it some time. I bought a daily planner and kept notes from appointments, schedules for treatments, and phone numbers in there. This helped a great deal. The notes really helped in filling in other family members about what the doctor said at appointments. This web site is a great place to get support and information. So many nights I spent here during my Dad's journey. It is great to have people who totally understand what you are going through. Sounds like your Mom is getting good treatments. There is a lot of hope on this board just keep reading. If you need to talk I'm always here. I totally understand. Denise

I too lost a message from my Dad. I had no idea that the company dumps saved messages. It was such a cute message. I was so upset to find I lost it. I would love to here his voice again. Good luck in saving yours and let us know if you figure out how to do this. Denise

We had a poem quite similar to this one at my Dad's funeral. It really does fit a cancer patients journey. It always makes me cry too. Denise

Wonderful news Cindi!!! I'm so very happy for you and I wish you many many more great check-up. Enjoy the 4th of July, you have a lot to celebrate. Denise

What a sweet story about your Mom and Dad's wedding day. I know these special days can be really tough to get through. Be kind to yourself and hold your little girl even tighter today. Denise

Thanks for the post Peggy. It got me thinking maybe I should start talking more. I have been very depressed lately. The only person I really talk about my pain with is my Mom. She is in so much pain herself that I think we just bring each other down. I have been working on major house projects and causing myself more stress. Really thought I was going to have a breakdown two nights ago. I think I'm just running myself crazy trying to run from the pain of losing Dad. I think I need to slow down and talk. Thanks for sharing with us Peggy. Denise