shelliemacs

I went the exact opposite way. I moved into mom and dads house after they both passed away and I completely rid the house of everything except one thing from each of them. I tore out the carpet my mom laid the year before her death, the wall paper mom and dad hung on their own (and it showed that they were not professional paper hangers), every single decoration every single piece of furniture EVERYTHING. the only things I kept were a painting my father painted himself, and one of those pencil sketches that are done at carnivals of the both of them with really huge heads on bodies that in no way resembeled thiers (its a funny picture) and thats it. I have their house, they are in the house with me and I sometimes feel and even smell them so that sustains me. All their neighbors are the same so they keep them alive for me too by talking about what my dad this with this tree or how my mom hung the 792 freaking birdhouses she owned on every branch of every tree on the property. I have one of those clutter free houses. very mimimum furniture, all the same color through out the whole house to make it seem very simple. ps the whole house is the color of chocolate milk and all the furniture and drapes are all dark chocolate so its very opposite of moms. she had a rainbow of colors in her house in every single room and every single decoration she ever purchased was out on display. wow did it take forever to clean that house out.

1)Back Stabbers 2) people who stop in the middle of the road in their cars to talk with someone they know coming the opposite was who also stops in the middle of the road and now both ways of traffic are stopped until the freaking feel like wrapping up their damn conversation about nothing and moving their rude ignorant as...er butts 3) people who can't be happy no matter how much they have or who don't appreciate what they do have and just don't see it already. NAMELY people who yell at their parents in front of me when all I wan't to say is "you freaking selfish bast....person you, what I would not give to have a parent to speak with at all. this could go on for top 100

Carleen and Keith. please enjoy this day for all it is worth. If your up to it Go out and CELEBRATE. Its about time you got good news.

Harry Potter movie three.

Hi Karen, you know that saying that "God doesn't give us more than we can handle" well obviously it was spoken by someone with absolutely nothing on their plates. you sure are carrying allot right now. The stress alone will wear you down like Niagara falls wears down a rock. I have been there. where you are now. I lost mom, dad, father in law all to LC in the last 2 years. My sister was dx's with Breast cancer the day we burried dad. i kinda went looney there for a while and with the help of numerous anti-anxiety meds I am doing ok now. You can't take care of others (I have found out) and not take some care of yourself. I will just break you down to the fabric of your soul. take care, vent here and ask allot of questions. shelly

at a complete loss for words.

My heart is very very heavy today. Gay, Dean lives on in every one of us because of his wisdom, kindness and knowledge. I will ALWAYS remember him.

False, movie made me cry too much, need humor now in my life. TPBM went streaking in either high school or college and keeps this secret to this day.

Lucie & Don, I am sorry to hear about the results, but as before and against all Lucie has already battled and won, that she will again come out on top of this setback.

Again Jen, I ask you to somehow rally yourself. I stare at the picture of your young kids and implore you to look into their eyes when the going gets you down. I would give 25 years of my life to have one more day with my mom and dad. I turn away from other mothers and daughters now becuase i feel robbed of my mom and dad for that matter. please find something deep down to hold onto and stoke the fighting flames that are there inside you. Always praying for you....

I just read this on MSN that Miss Ellis passed away from lung cancer today. Actress Barbara Bel Geddes has died Most famous role was Miss Ellie Ewing on ‘Dallas’ Barbara Bel Geddes, shown here in 1949, had a whole career before "Dallas," but her role as the gentle yet strong Ewing family matriarch brought her a whole new generation of fans. Keystone / Getty Images MSNBC staff and news service reports Updated: 3:57 p.m. ET Aug. 10, 2005 Barbara Bel Geddes, the winsome actress who rose to stage and movie stardom but reached her greatest fame as Miss Ellie Ewing in the long-running TV series “Dallas,” has died. She was 82. The San Francisco Chronicle said she died Monday of lung cancer at her home in Northeast Harbor, Maine. Jordan-Fernald Funeral Home in Mount Desert, Maine, confirmed the death Wednesday, but owner Bill Fernald said the family asked that no further information be given out. Bel Geddes, daughter of renowned industrial designer Norman Bel Geddes, was nominated for an Academy Award for best supporting actress for the 1948 drama “I Remember Mama” and was the original Maggie the Cat on Broadway in “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.” Story continues below ↓ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- advertisement -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Dallas” came late in her career. She had retired to take care of her husband, Windsor Lewis, after he fell ill with cancer in 1966. He died in 1972. Her earnings depleted by his long illness, she found work scarce for a middle-aged actress and said she was “flat broke” in 1978 when she accepted the role as matriarch of a rambunctious Texas oil family. ‘Dallas’: Fun marked by tragedy Though castigated by critics, “Dallas” hurtled to the top of the audience ratings and spawned copycat shows. Bel Geddes won an Emmy in 1980 as best lead actress in a drama series and remains the only nighttime soap star to be so honored. She was only eight years older than actor Larry Hagman, who played her son, J.R. Bel Geddes called “Dallas “real fun,” but it was also marked by tragedy. In 1981, Jim Davis, who played Miss Ellie’s husband, Jock Ewing, died. “It was like losing her own husband again,” said “Dallas” producer Leonard Katzman. “It was a terribly difficult and emotional time for Barbara.” In March 1984, Bel Geddes was stricken with a major heart attack. Miss Ellie was played by Donna Reed for six months, then Bel Geddes returned to “Dallas,” remaining until 1990, a year before CBS canceled the show. Broadway to Hollywood In 1945, Bel Geddes made a splash on Broadway at 23 with her first important role in “Deep Are the Roots,” winning the New York Drama Critics Award as best actress. She announced to a reporter: “My ambition is to be a good screen actress. I think it would be much more exciting to work for Frank Capra, George Cukor, Alfred Hitchcock or Elia Kazan than to stay on Broadway.” Hollywood was quick to notice. In 1946 she signed a contract with RKO that granted her unusual request to be committed to only one picture a year. In her first movie she costarred with Henry Fonda in “The Long Night,” a disappointing remake of a French film. Her second film was a hit playing a budding writer in George Stevens’ “I Remember Mama,” the touching story of an immigrant family in San Francisco starring Irene Dunne as Mama. With her delicate features and patrician manner, Bel Geddes became a popular leading lady in films. CONTINUED: 'Don't go, learn your craft' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1 | 2 | Next >

wow! don't expect yourself to be "yourself" for a while. I remember when I found out my mom had LC and then 9 months later my dad had LC. I think your mind has taken you into a "protective mode" it sort of shuts down all the systems that can make you loose it and keeps you functioning on the basic level. It will take a bit to get yourself wrapped around the situation. dont think the worst yet. medicines can do wonders in just days. all is not lost and never think it is. let them dx him and get a treatment plan in order, never stay with a dr. who wont fight for your dad.

ok, you at the end of your rope, what I need you to do is tie a knot and just hang on. We are all standing above you and pulling the rope out of the hole. all we need you to do is just hang on to the rope itself. let us do all the work. everyone...ONE, TWO THREE..PULLLLLLLL MUCHO LUV TO YA MY FRIEND.

Donna, I am not a survivor but rather was the caretaker for 3 LC and 1 breast cancer survivors. My mom was dx'd in Jan of 03 with Non Small Cell, but I lost her in August of 03. My dad was dx'd in January of 04 with Small Cell, and I too lost him in June of 04. My sister was dx'd with breast cancer the day we burried dad and she is cancer free right now. and just this year my Father in Law was dx'd with Non Small Cell and again I lost him. from the point of view of a caretaker. Have someone with you at your appointments so someone who isn't the patient will hear exactly what the dr's are saying. someone who can take notes. so you can refer back to them when the "fog " lifts. and just someone to hold your hand. Turn to your family now. They feel helpless enough not being able to cure your themselves, make them part of your treatment. Make them feel like they are helping you in some small way. I needed to know I helped my parents. I could do nothing else. I am sorry your here. but your have a great deal of options and living a long life is more an option now than ever with the newest treatments. never give up the fight and you are already a survivor against cancer.

YES! my cousin who had Oral/neck cancer was on antiobiotics 24/7 because of tumor fever. He could not come off of them or his temp would spike so high he would have to be hospitalized with IV antiobiotics. he temp daily ran between 99-102 and it was that was for almost a year.

my heart is breaking for you right now. please know she is extremely happy right now and not in ANY pain at all. she will always be in your heart and no further than a heartbeat away from you.

I am so very sad to hear about Cathy. She is going to be greatly missed She fought extremely hard and won in the end. my prayers to her family.

my god it was so painful to read your post because I literally Lived that. I swear to you word for word I lived that life the last month of moms life. Dad was literally doing housework from the floor up, even repainting the walls. to say things were tense was a huge understatement. my sister and I fought like mortal enemies over nothing. we were tense with dad because he was in so much denial about mom and her not getting better. All I can say to you is it is normal. I think anyway. your emotions are on overload and everyone is angry that your mom is so ill. somehow everyone needs to understand that you all are trying to acheive the same goal. to comfort your mom. I have you all in my prayers

with my mom when we were in it. when her sister came from 2 hours away for just a weekend. my mom pretty much shunned me away too. I now feel she wanted me to pretend, even for a day, that she did not have cancer, and my life was not turned upside down taking care of her. i know my mom was humiliated when I had to feed her through a feeding tube and wash her with a washcloth. moms are independant and in their eyes they are the caretakers, not their daughters, i really feel she just for a bit, wants you to not have to be the adult and just be her daughter again. you need a break anyway, take it and refule like others have said.

I smell cake..... if I say congrats on finishing chemo, can I have some cake.

oh Kim don't worry about me. I am hoping people find my distorted - protruding pelvis sort of sexy and wont' be offended when it sort of clickty-clacks with every step I take. Its just the ear shattering screams with each movement that would turn any cute guy off I fear. But level 40 pain out of 1-10 will not deter me in my hunt for that guy who owns ear plugs. really though, I am fine, hopefully I can fall down the stairs on the left side and shove that ol'pelvis right back into place soon.

Take a huge lesson from me people, never ever do this. ok, so I went out and bought myself a beautiful new Nordictrack Treadmill thinking I would start walk/running at home at night when the quiet gets to me. well was I wrongggggggg!!! the first week on the treadmill I thought I had it down, so I DID NOT wear the safety cord that automaticially stops the treadmill when you move too far back from the front of it. nope, not me, i don't need any safety cord, so I was running and watching tv at the same time. BAM went down like a 2 ton truck over a cliff at 60 mph and was thrown through the sheet rock wall behind me and dislocated my pelvis from my hip socket on my right side. the quiet was broken by my piercing girly screams hoping my neighbor behind me (cause the neighbor next to me was on vacation and in no way would hear me from where they were) would hear me and hobble over on his crutches which he uses now after his knee replacement surgery three weeks ago and somehow get into my house, get down the stairs and somehow get me up and helped. so get the picture in your minds, without laughing, and see a short 5 foot tall bouncing human bean-ball soaring through sheet rock and laying there with what seemed like my feet behind my ears screaming for help to a neighbor at least 300 hundred feet away and through two houses to help me. please don't try this at home, i am a professional loser.

Please let Kathy know, if possible, that her journey be peaceful and speedy. I remember my dads nurse rubbing his arm as she went off shift the night he took the walk and what she said stays with me still "safe and speedy journey my friend, save a seat for me"

wow. I am in awe of your strenght but also a bit worried that you are making yourself so very busy that your not taking the time to go through the grief process. I am just worried that one day it will hit you so hard, you will hit rock bottom. please be extra kind to yourself and do something for YOURSELF once in a while. Faith needs you deerly now and as her mommy you need to take care of yourself. much luv

I can't come up with words. I am so unbelieveably sorry.