I am a Respiratory Therapist, and was caregiver to my Mom. I know how you feel, sometimes too much knowledge is a bad thing. There were a lot of positives to me being involved in my Mom's care though. I always attended appts with my parents, and asked the questions they never thought to ask. When I noticed Mom was dehydrated, I was able to start IV fluids on her at home (with Doc's approval of course) and save her a trips to the ER. I did a lot of research and spoke with alot of my anesthesia collegues and was able to suggest meds to help with nausea and pain, when the normals weren't cutting it. Use all your knowledge and skills in a positive way, but remember to be the spouse too, not just the nurse!
Oh yeah, welcome to this great community!
Faylene