Barbb Posted November 13, 2007 Share Posted November 13, 2007 Today we met with the onc. and PA. Rod had a chest xray this am, no pneumonia. The Dr. will not do anymore chemo as it would kill Rod. A Hospice person is coming out today, Rod doesn't want to sign up yet but he can't stay awake more than 2 minutes. He was in and out with the Dr. and PA. I know it is his decision, but if he's not awake would it be ok if I sign up for us? I just don't know what is the right thing to do, we need them but Rod should decide. Please pray for a peaceful passing when the time comes. Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vespa68 Posted November 13, 2007 Share Posted November 13, 2007 I am so sorry you are going through this. It is a horrible situation to be in. I fought Hospice tooth and nail. I resented every time it was brought up by Doctors or anyone else for that matter. It was because of what was said on this board that made me change my mind and I am a very stubborn person so that was some feat. Hospice was the best thing I could have done for my mom as well as myself and my husband who were taking care of her. Hospice is there for the family in huge ways. Please give them a try and if it is not for you, then so be it. When they came to our home, they told us what they do and wanted to know if we would be interested,if not, they would leave. I don't know what I would have done without them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbb Posted November 13, 2007 Author Share Posted November 13, 2007 Vespa, Thank you so much. I know how great they are from when they cared for my mom. But they were called in so late, she died the 2nd day they were there. That is how we saw it for us. The nurse who came today was wonderful and informative. We are going to sign up tomorrow. This service came highly recommended from a dear friend who used their services. Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillise Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Barb, While normally I think the patient should make the decisions about treatment options, it may be time for you to do what you think is best for your husband and for you. Don't forget that you need support at this time too. Susan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VegasMomOf3 Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Overall, Hospice was a great thing for my Mom. They coordinated EVERYTHING!! Equipment, medications (which were free once on Hospice), really anything we needed for Mom. It sure allowed Dad and I to concentrate just on Mom. And the Hospice continues to follow-up with My Dad for 18 months after my Mom passed away. When you really think about it, the services they give are a godsend!! My thoughts and prayers with you. Hugs, Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 thoughts and prayers. IO know that you will do the right thing. Can not offer any advice Deb passed in hospital and we never used hospice though.. But in your heart you will know and He will be ok with everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don M Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Barb, you all have my prayers that Rod and the rest of you get through this time with peace and dignity. Don m Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mary colleen Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Barb, I think one of the responsibilities of marriage is to make decisions in the other person's best interest, applying what you know about him, when that person may not be fully able to make those decisions. This is a tough one, but I know you'll do the right thing. You have my prayers. MC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nova Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 I've never been in your situation, yet, but You know your husband the best. You're the one that loves him the most.... I would follow where your heart leads. Those feelings will help you make the right decisions. Please know you're in my prayers. Nova Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flwrjunke Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Barb, I'm so very sorry to read of whats going on with Rod. When my Mom went on Hospice, it felt like we were defeated. But, we still held out hope that if she started feeling better, we would have the option to go off of hospice and seek treatment. At that time the doctor did tell us that many people under utilize hospice, they wait to long to sign up. Bring in hospice, made all the difference for her and our family. Again, I'm so sorry, and prayers for the days ahead. Patty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Welthy Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Barb, I'm sorry you find yourself in this quandry. It's is very hard to honor and sometimes to even know what your spouses wishes are. It's a very tough situation to be in, but I know you will do what is in his best interest. Bless you as you travel on this leg of the journey and keep hope! God does throw surprises at us when we least expect them. I hope Rod will now be comfortable and you will find peace in your heart with this decision. Hugs, Welthy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomadawn Posted November 14, 2007 Share Posted November 14, 2007 Barb, I am so saddened to hear of your situation right now but know that your heart will guide you to do the right thing. Wishing you and Rod strength & peace God bless Debbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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