missyk

Worry is a HUGE part of this journey at the beginning. Cancer is always on your mind, the ever-present companion to everyday life. It DOES get to be less noticable, though, as time goes on. You'll find times when you've gone a whole day and NOT thought about it!! You'll eventually get to where the good news is just that...good news. There are ups...and, unfortunately, there are downs. But isn't life that way anyway? Just remember...hope is there for YOU, too. Hope that tomorrow brings a day when the worry for your mom is on the back-burner and you forget for a moment that there IS a "new normal". Much love and many prayers...

A good cup of hot tea and my friend here to sit and talk with!

Karen, My deepest sympathies are extended to you and your family. I'm so sorry for the loss of your cousin.

Oh I'm so sorry to hear it wasn't better news from the PET! Please, as gently as you can, let your Mom know that the new therapies are more gentle than they've ever been and many have few side effects that aren't managable pretty easily. There are many, many people living quality lives with stage IV lung cancer. We had this same discussion with Mom when she was diagnosed and at first she didn't want to go through the trouble (and yes, the expense) of treatment when she had been told it wouldn't make more than 6 months difference. She lived for a year and a half past that 6 months with a good quality of life and we treasure that time now. Ultimately, though, it is your mom's decision and I know you'll do a wonderful job of supporting her, whatever she chooses. I know it's hard...we're here for you.

My medical terminology classes lets me know WHAT those words are...but putting them all together is a totally different story. Might I suggest hopping over to Dr. West (at http://www.onctalk.com ) and posting it for him...he'll read it and give you an explaination, I'm sure! I'm sorry you're having to wait and worry

Air conditioning takes the humidity out of the air, which is what always made it so hard for Mom to breathe comfortably. She also ran an air purifier since she had central air conditioning. Best of luck to your mum!!

*sighs* I watch NASCAR, actually. My dad and I used to talk about the different drivers. I'm lucky in that I have a great relationship with my step-dad and I also spend alot of time with him on Father's Day...so I get a mixed bag on the day. The joy of having my "daddy"...and the sadness of not having my "dad". Do what you need to, do what feels right...we're here with you.

I'm so sorry to hear of your cousin's fight. How incredibly hard that must be for your family. I can tell you from experience that Mom was able to live for almost three months with almost no food...only liquids...but she originally had alot of body fat that her body used up in that time. However, if she's unable to take even liquids by mouth, the body dehydrates much faster and, in general, it's thought to be not much longer than a week. Sending hugs and prayers to you and yours...

As Nick brought up...get ahold of the Social Security Administration and get the paperwork going for disability. It takes up to 6 months to start receiving benefits, I believe (someone will come around who knows better than I do) but it'll take some of the strain off knowing it's coming!! All the other's have had great advice, too! Please take it and remind Mom that right now it's not about the money...it's about the fight. I know that was something my Mom worried about often, too...and we reassured her often that it just didn't matter...SHE mattered. I had to come back and add...you might also want to have her check with her local department of human services on a "medically needy" service. I'm not sure what it all entails but they should be able to tell her if there's a program available. If she's paying her own insurance and they DO have a program, alot of times it will also pay HER premium, too!!! Sending many prayers for you all...

Heidi... I'm so sorry you and your mom will be back in the boxing ring but I can't imagine a better person to be in her corner for the fight! Take your time to have your pity party and I know that when you get to see Mom...you'll be ready and so will she. Thinking of you, sending love and prayers...

*Raises my glass of sparkling cider* Congratulations on one year...and may you see many, many, many more!!

Yup, makes me cry, too. Thanks for posting the lyrics, Randy!

Oh look at those EYES!!! What a beautiful little boy!!! Congratulations Amie and family!!!

Geez, I can't believe I'm admitting to this but (no pun intended)... I've always suffered from chronic constipation and any pain medications I take make it worse...I *DO* have a solution that's always worked for me, though: Handful of dried apricots (Go Becky!!!) or prunes in the morning, LOTS of water (as opposed to my normal soda intake), and walking. Senakot and the such has never done anything for me, so I had to go the natural route. No advice on the pain issue...wish I had something to offer there other than prayers, but you definately have those! ~Thinking of you and praying~

I keep reading and reading and seeing all the young people who are here, fighting this disease with their parents...some even fighting for themselves...and I'm terrified of posting a response because I don't want them to see that Mom died and lose hope. I'm proud of the fight Mom put up...and I'm sad, of course, that she didn't get to win in the dictionary version of the word...but now I feel at a loss to help anyone who's just getting into this battle. I feel like, if they read the profile I have down there (the santized version, though I did print out and keep the original version so I have it), they'll see that she died anyway and it will suck the wind right out of them. I don't want to sugar-coat anything because this disease and it's effects on the family suck big-time...but I truely believe that up until Mom took her last breath, there was hope for her to fight on. I know I've not fully gotten into missing her, fully engaged the sadness and hurt that are left in her place and I'll be honest in saying I'm not sure I really want to. Right now I avoid my family as much as I can, avoid the subject of Mom's illness and death when I can dodge it and when I can't I talk of "facts"...not feelings. But I want to *DO* something to help...without making someone else feel badly. Any advice?

Nick... I'm not personally an AMEX holder...but I have a blog with over 300 hits daily.... Guess where your link is going? Awesome! Hope I can get ya some more people over there that *are* AMEX card holders.

Hi Tova and welcome... I was smiling as I read the last update you posted...it reminded me very much of my mom and I shortly after her diagnosis. Actually, much of what you've posted so far has reminded me of her, her family, and our family...though there are three of her children, I'm the baby. My mom's family has also been dessimated by cancer...there were 8 children, there are 4 left...all died of different cancers, and two of those surviving have been treated for cancer. I know your feeling of fear about that one! I'm glad to know there's a treatment plan in place and that your mom is getting back in the fighting spirit. Mom told me many times that the hardest thing was sitting around waiting; that all she wanted was something to DO about it. You and your family will be in my prayers for a wonderfully successful treatment!

Of Mice and Men, Little Women and One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest. Those are the three that I'd love to sit down and get through. Little Women I started and just haven't gotten "into it" so it just sits.

I, too, echo the sentiment of second opinions (or third or fourth) and am curious what your wife's opinion is on it all. Mom was determined to DO something about her cancer and went with first-line carbo/taxol for chemo...and did very well on it. Best of luck in your decision-making process and with your wife's treatment (whatever she chooses)! You're both in my prayers!

I can relate to the heartache that comes from unexpected disc's that are there. Mom made a DVD apparently...I've watched it once and I put it away. It's just too hard right now. I, too, believe that your husband lives on, watching over you with loving eyes. It's in those quiet moments when he's closest to you. Believe it. Much love,

Oh {{{{Kelly}}}} Happy Birthday to you!! I'm so sorry that it's your first first. I'm there walking with you, singing the birthday song with the party hat on and hoping like nothing else that this day passes gently and with smiles and laughter for you!! lots of love..

Great news!! Glad to hear it went well and you're on your way! Many prayers for a quick recovery and not too much pain!

I had to smile when I read this update on what you've been doing...reminds me so much of me when Mom was diagnosed! I'll let you know later if that's a good thing or not! Please, let us know what Mom finds out! Praying for the best results possible!

Sending prayers...and wishing there was more I could do to help.