Remembering Dave

that's great news, Bruce. I just saw this. I took Dave to the ER on Monday, Jan. 19 (Martin Luther King Jr. day) because of tightness in his chest and wheezing. They ran a bunch of tests like x-ray and CT scan and he had bronchitis, too! They were so nice there, told us that whenever we were uncertain like that to bring him there, anyone with cancer is certainly justified in going to the ER at any time. I'm glad your doctor sent you there, he's a smart dude. Karen C.

Oh, man, this sounds like ME! My mom has colon cancer, my husband has lung cancer - I have an almost 3 year old, I work full time, I have a one hour commute EACH WAY to work, and my parents would like me involved in my mom's treatment but tell me that I don't have to. But I feel like I have to. My dad is a very young 75 but is a little hard of hearing and mom's oncologist (also Dave's oncologist) is very soft spoken. and I'm afraid my mom is only going to hear what she wants to hear, and it had better all be nice and pleasant! Don't know how big a place you work at, but can you put in for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) so you feel a little less pressured about missing work to attend doctor's appointment with your parents? It sounds to me like you should be there, I don't think they're telling you the whole story, just want they can remember or what they heard. You might feel better if you were there to hear it, take notes, and make sure the right thing is getting done. It also helps when you need to do a little advocating for them if the staff at the oncologist's office knows your name and face. I know it helps me. My mom was "assigned" a different oncologist than Dave's but in the same practice when she was in the hospital, and that dude couldln't see her until August, which was totally unaccepable to me, so I called the staff that take care of Dave's oncologist and pleaded mom's case and they got her in to see Dave's doc within days. and yes, take 15 minutes every now and then for yourself. Like DeanCarl has said to me, live for the present day, (and aim to get through that day each morning). Do the little things that might make your day easier. Get take out food for dinner if you are tired or don't have time to prepare dinner. I myself have fallen in love with rising crust frozen pizza. Let anyone who offers to help you, to help. I don't know how old your children are, but our daughter is definitely affected by all of this. If she hears the word Grandma she says boo boo. if anyone says the word Daddy she says boo boo. I think she is learning empathy and doubt she's going to be affected for life by the experience (not any more than spending the first year of her life in an orphanage). you should explain to your children that Grandma is sick and you will have to help their grandparents some so you might not be as attentative to them as usual, children understand more than we think sometimes. Take care and keep us posted. Karen C.

sorry, David A. guess you gave too gentle of an answer, haha. Dean and Don, you are both true gentlemen. Karen

Hey, Berisa, are you good at blushing and looking REALLY embarassed? maybe that will do it. just occured to me - no men have weighed in on this subject yet! Karen p.s. geez, I gotta get some work done. I am way too dependent on this website to get me through the day!

OK, now I think I'm crazy because I just got on foxnews.com and cnn.com and see no mention of a typhoon. so maybe it's my ears affected by Dave's chemo, not Dave's ears . . . Karen

oops, the term "blow by blow" was definitely a pun not intended, considering we are talking about a typhoon here. Karen

Cat - I think it's 14 hours. We spent two weeks in China two years ago getting Faith and I think that's right. It was hard to get the time correct to call our family back home so we'd go to the hotel's business center and send them blow by blow emails. Karen

Yes, everyone here is making good points. Small cell is never staged by numbers, just by limited (just in the lung) or extensive (has spread outside the lung). Also, surgery is almost never done for small cell unless it was caught VERY early and they're SURE it is very isolated. Small cell, especially if caught early, responds very well to chemo and radiation. very well. so if it is small cell you want the chemo. it is a very fast growing cancer so you won't the chemo to hunt down any stray cancer cells that's in your bloodstream. I'm just repeating what everyone said. I would get a copy of everything in your file at the doctor's office and look it over AND take it to a major cancer center like Dave said for a second opinion. and come back here and give us more information. I'm really curious about this. Take care and hang in there. Karen C.

I heard, just briefly, on the radio this morning while driving to work that a big typhoon hit Hong Kong and that the city had come to a standstill. Are you and your family OK? Just checking on you, my dear friend. God Bless, Karen C.

Well, certainly a mixture of great news and not so great news. Glad to have you back with clear scans and all but sorry to hear about the others. Here is hoping that all turns out well on the family front. Haqve fun with the new Dell. My folks have had nothing but Dells for years. I have a cousin who has worked for Dell for years. David C

Hi, When I joined I was in the throes of chemo h#ll so gues my creative juices were not flowing David is my first name and C is for my last name. I thought about cacres (prounounced c-acres) which is a shortened version of what we have named our home-chapmanacres. When growing up most of my freinds called me chappy or chapster but that did not really stick when I left home to go to school. Fun post, lets have more.

your boss sounds like he's on the rude side. in my opinion, these words are not at all acceptable to be used in a business setting. call me a prude, but they are not acceptable to be used at all. I will admit, however, that I haved used a few of them myself a few times lately when talking about the return of Dave's cancer, but I did not use them in a calm manner. I used them very angrily and emotionally. I think you should just try to ignore him. here in the u.s., there are laws to protect workers from harassment and that language may fall under the definition of harassment, but not sure how far you could go with a complaint like that in Hong Kong. Take care, my friend. Karen C.

Cathy, I have been told that Small Cell is not much effected through surgury but does respond very well to chemo. I do not see where you ae from in your signature but I think you should go to a cancer center for a 2nd opinion. Like I said Small cell eacts very well to chemo and even though you have had surgury there could still be cells floating around. Please keep us informed how you are doing. My prayers are with you. David C

Berisa, that's beautiful. attending church is so healing some times. I think crying is OK, it is a way of releasing emotions to heal. I'm glad your Mom went with you, too, and I hope she felt some of what you did. You're going to be OK, this sounds so normal and yes beautiful. take care and God Bless my dear friend, Karen C.

Connie, the fact that you go through life with a big smile on your face and helping others is a true testament to your spirit and your strength. God Bless, Karen C.

Haylee, I am so sorry. My boss lost her husband two years ago at age 38 of a massive heart attack. they had three small children at the time - 1, 4 and 7 years old. it was such a shock. Please know my condolences are with you and your brother's whole family. God Bless, Karen C.

Joni, I am heartbroken for you to hear this news. I am so so very sorry. I feel so close to you as our situations sounded so much the same when Robert was first diagnosed, and I had such high hopes for him. Please take comfort in knowing that Robert is now with God, at home. God Bless and with Christ's love, Karen and Dave and Faith

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayes. I got to the hospital around 9:00 yesterday and got checked in and in my room around 10:00. Finallly got hookep up around 10:45, which is quicker than I expected actually. I got hydration and inti nasua meds fist and then they hooked up the cisplatin first and then the CPT-11 after that. I will tell you that the cisplatin was not like the carboplatin I recvd last year. The only side effect I had while receiving it was hot flashes, which a wet wash rag helped a lot. It made me a little woozy also but that started getting better as soon as the cisplatin bag was removed. I was done with the chemo around 5:00 and had a MRI of the brain performed around 6:15. I was pretty wiped out from the whole day after all that. Karen got to the hospital before my MRI and afterward we went over to Karens folks to pick up Faith. Yesterday was Karens dads bithday so we hung out a little while and finally got home aound 8:30. I was still very tired and a little light headed. I sat down with my laptop but could not muster what was needed to post. I slept pretty soundly all night but still feel as if I could sleep most of the day away. I had a bowl of ceeal and feel a little better. Not sure what kind of side effects may pop up over the next few weeks or days but let them come. I am ready. Roll the flow and concentate on killing the cancer and I will not worry about any side effects since it just means that the chemo is working. David C

Ginny, Earl is a very lucky man to have you in his life. It is great that you have things unde control with his care. I could not imagine not cying in your situation. Good luck with your proceedure at the hospital. You and Eal ae in my payers always. David C

Wow Becky, doing #'s like that we will have to start calling you Rainman.......or Rainwoman, you know 246 matches. You will have to watch the movie to get that one. I hope all the doctors can figure out whats going on. Maybe do a freeze job on the brain. My prayers are with you. David C

Shelly, best of luck, I'm counting on it just being a benign cyst thing. God Bless, Karen

Dave's radiation oncologist is Christopher Johnson with Massey Cancer Center, part of Virginia Commonwealth University Medical Center here in Richmond. It's a pretty major cancer research/treatment center and he's pretty darn good, except he did guess wrong on the bonkitis. But he did send Dave to the ENT for a biopsy so at least he didn't assume anything, which is a good sign. By the way, educate me, I'm too wrapped up in the world of small cell, but what does BAC mean? Best of luck, you are a real fighter. God Bless, Karen

Dean took the words right out of my mouth. Just because your mother has lung cancer does not mean she is dying ANY TIME SOON. (hey, aren't we all dying, if you really want to look at it that way, but I prefer to remember that we're all living!) Find out more about her staging, the location of her tumors, and what treatment her doctors have recommended for her, and come back and post that. She could have small cell lung cancer, or non small cell, or a few other more uncommon types. that makes a difference as well. as for telling your children, they are so very young, I would just tell them that their grandmother is sick so things may not quite be the same with her for a while, or that their mommy might be a bit preoccupied or on the phone alot helping grandma, but they don't need to hear the whole story, they wouldn't understand it. we have a daughter who is almost 3 (picture attached to the post - isn't she beautiful?) and my husband is the one with the lung cancer - she knows that daddy has a big boo boo and sometimes she can't play as much with him as she usually does, and that's enough for her to know. come back and tell us more and let us help you. you can get through this and be a great source of strength for your mother. God Bless, Karen C.

I love the photo and I love your family! Karen C.

Well here we go, another leg of my journey begins. I go to the Hospital this moning to start my chemo regime for my bonkitis cancer. This really sucks but I am ready. I have my laptop filled with good music to listen to amd I also have some movies I rented yesterday so the time will be filled. We are going to both take Faith to Nursery school and then Kaen will drop me off at the hospital around 8:30. The chemo is supposed to take 6 hours but I will be working on hospital time so I may get discharged by midnight, Just Kidding. Keep me in your prayers please. David C