-Cheryl-

Bess B. I am praying for you hard! I am glad that you are feeling energy. May God heal you and put you into remmission. Cheryl

Dave, So glad for you and the great news! "in remission!" What wonderful words those are. I bet your family is thrilled, as we all are here at the lc board. I just recently got a pom puppy. She looks like a little fruit bat. She chews on my toes and hands till I get up out of bed in the mornning, then barks at me when I am in the kitchen till I fix her breakfast. She is bartely eight weeks and goes in and out the dog door to potty! We have 4 dogs and 2 horses now, and they make me stay active to care for them. But the joy and unconditional love I receive from them is well worth the effort!

Len, So glad you had a good weekend. You have the most precious boys! You are right.....you seem to have "the greatest family!" Those boys are going to need you in their lives as they grow. Your wife will need you as well! I believe the "cancer demon" had no idea what it was up against when it met the likes of you! You are a force to reckon with!! Stay strong!!! Chery and Jack

Dear Linda, I can empathize with you about waiting for treatment and fear of the cancer spreading. I am praying for your Dad right this moment! You do have a "Special Dad", he is quite the surviver! It is that strength within him that will pull himself through this too! Cheryl

Jay, I know you "hate this" and "I hate it for you.!" You are not as nauseated and physically stronger. That is progress!. Feeling better physically will help your mental outlook. I want you to do something for yourself! Each day I want you to plan an activity to get you up and moving (Within reason of course, I realize you have a broken leg, had lung surgery, and are on chemo!) As soon as you are able, you need to get out of the house and hangout with friends. Set small daily goals, make plans for what you will do that day. You need to laugh and to cry. Sometimes, I will rent a video or listen to music to help me get in touch with those feelings. (Just know that we can maintain our own depression by isolating ourselves and playing nothing but sad songs.) Keep a journal of you thoughts, which will help you to identify emotions and triggers to those emotions. Put together a scrap book of your mother to help you memoralize her. When we lose someone in an accident so sudden, we are in such shock. Give youself the opportunity to sort through your feelngs and allow yourself time to grieve. I know that your mom was your biggest support! Especially during such a scarey time for yourself. Did you say you have a sister? I truely wish that I could come through cyberspace to comfort you and give you a hug. This is probably the toughest hurt anyone could ever go through! Most people your age do not experience the kind of loss you have encountered. Jay, not only hve you lost your Mom, but the life you knew before cancer. It may not be revealed to you just yet, but God has a purpose for you Jay. You will live on to fulfill that purpose and your mother will guide your every step. I am here if you need to chat. Cheryl

Thanks for the advice Ginny, Joanie,Jenny, Don, Terrie, Cathy. and Nancy. Jack told me that he had visited that web site, but that it seemd the "insured" had few rights. I appreciate the direction and will check it out further though. Jack is self-employed and currently has no insurance, which really worries me! Cathy you asked about the surgery? I went in to have a mediastinoscopy and a possible lobectomy if my mid chest lymph nodes were not cancerous. A PET scan prior to surgery showed glucose uptake in the mid chest, but the nodes didn't seem very swollen. The doctor thought maybe they were just inflamed. When the surgeon actually got inside my mediastinal area the nodes were larger than visable on previous tests. A biopsy showed cancer in both nodes that were biopsied and spread to some surroundig tissue. So he closed me up. ost doctors don't seem to think the surgery will improve survival rate, but this guy does!. He had to convice the chemo onc and rad onc that surgery could down stage me and possible give me a "5% more chance of survival beyond 5 years." I will take any extra percent I can get! But now I have got to shrink all the nodes, and do it within a couple of months. Otherwise, the surgeon has refused to do the surgery. I have been quite anxious about it, even before all of this insurance business. I do thank you for your prayers when I know that you all already have so much to worry about yourselves. Cheryl

Hello everyone, Happy Fourth of July to you all! So sorry I haven't posted in a while. I have been reading your posts to keep up with everyone. I tried to work as much as possible this week to extend my FMLA time. The agency I work at will merge with another mental health organization serving 9 counties on the date my FMLA time expires in Sept., which means I will lose my insurance. The HR Director told me that since our current insurance will go away when we merge, so will the chance to get Cobra. Plus, since I have a pre-existing condition they probably won't pick me up on the new insurance. Is this legal? He did say something about the possibility of qualifying for something called the "Texas Risk Management Pool" maybe? My insurance is due to run out when I need it most, which is for surgery! I also finally start treatment on Mon. after two months of waiting! I will do 8 chemos in a row of cisplatin and VP16, along with 25 rounds of rad. Then my surgeon will attempt surgery again. Chemo nurse said the first and last chemo will be the longest. Anyone know how long this may last? I may also end up doing more chemo toward the end too. I just don't know much because the chemo onc went out of town and was supposed to get back with me. His nurse left the info on my answering machine. The excuse given for delay was... need for a "mutual decision and agreement on course of treatment by all 3 doctors and coordination of appts. Meanwhile....the lymph nodes in my mediastinal area just ache constantly. Every doctor I have talked to says "your lymph nodes shouldn't hurt there." The tumor in my R. middle lobe is only about 1 inch big! Anybody with stage 3A exerience this kind of pain? And finally, what is this PCI treatment that I have read about on the board. Sorry for all the questions. Enjoy the Holiday! Cheryl

Shelly, It sounds as though yo have a lot of insight into what is depressing you....and that is half the battle. You were also right about how this disease "takes away one's control." I myself am a "control freak," and struggle with the very same issue. common sense tells us that we cannot control other people, only the way we chose to react to them. That doesn't mean that we can't influence other people's choices though! Ask your mom what she would expect of you if the situation were reversed? Help her to find the desire and will to live. Chemo is tough, but she is tougher! Look at the survival instincts it has taken for her to raise her children and make it this far! Also, Don Wood mentiones in a post that his wife, Lucy, became very sick from chemo and had to take a couple of months off from it. Would that be an option for you? Cheyrl

Shannon, I have followed your postings and share with you in the agony of your grief. Know that you do not carry this burrden alone. Take comfort in knowing that you did everything possible to fight this disease with Mike, and it was because this was what he wanted. You helped him to achieve 18 months, despite his dagnosis. We hope that you stay with the board for continued support. I also believe that your experience Shannon will help others through this journey in a way that nobody else could. May God's Angels spread their wings around you to comfort and protect you. Cheryl and Jack

Hey eveveryone, Missed you guys. So glad that the board is back up! I had my first rad onc appt.. Of course he gave me the grim statistics, only this time 15% for a five year survival rate. That really seemed to "make my day!" Tomorrow I will go for another CAT scan for treatment purposes and not diagnostic. But, the doc did kind of freak me out a little today. He said that there was something in my neck on the PET scan, but that it wasn't enough to be considered cancer? What....yet you mean? Anyone have this experience or know what could cause this? I tell you, it is starting to make me a little paranoid. I still won't begin actual rad till next Wed., and that is if the doc can coordinate treatment with the chemo onc (who of course will be out of town until July 1st!) Treatment goal is still surgery. It has been past 6 weeks since first diagnosis! On a positive note, Jack got me a new Pom puppy! That makes 4 dogs and 2 horses! I guess I will have to live to take care of all these critters! God Bless you all. Cheryl

Tiny, Let me be the first to welcome you into the "empty headed club." Always looking to build up our membership! This will be "BIG SUMMER" for you TinY!! Cheryl

Becky, Prior to my diagnosis I had gone to see my gynocologist about fertility treatments. My PET scan revealed hot spots, one on my ovary and the other on my uterus. My pulmonologist referred me back to my gyno for an ultrasound. She thinks that all of this is fibroid tumors and not cancer. Of course anything short of a biopsy isn't reassuring to me. We also discussed fertility options. She said that chemo can destroy your eggs. Could put you into early menopause. I just burst into tears. Dr.K was so sympathetic that she had tears in her eyes. Basically, freezing your eggs is not usually successful, because ice crystals can form on them. A fertilized egg stands a better chance of being frozen successfully. My doc suggested that perhaps my sister could donate her eggs. Becky, I am sorry for the way your doc treated you. This disease takes so much away from you. I guess doctors expect you just to concentrate on the cancer, and wheter or not you will survive. Having something to look forward to in the future, a goal that you had planned for despite this disease, gives one the will to survive. It offers hope. When I go to Baylor Medical Center for various tests, I always pass by the maternity ward and neonatal unit. I think to myself "Why God did I get cancer instead of a baby?" Perhaps it is because God wants me to care for other people's children. I am a counselor and my job enriches me. Kids have taught me what is truely most important in life, and because of that I feel blessed. I hope the best for you and will think of you in my prayers. Cheryl

Sam, It was so good to see you post, as we have been following your progress! Sorry to hear about your pastor leaving. I imagine his shoes will be tough to fill. My sister fed me spiritually and has been so very comforting to me since I was diagnosed, but recently left for Colorado. I miss having her here to talk to and lift my spirits. May you continue to grow stronger each and every day! I am sure your patients are thrilled to have you back!! Cheryland Jack

Bob, Congrats on the check-up... Didn't you guys go from winter to summer? What happened to spring? Enjoy your trip! -Cheryl and Jack-

It is amazing how fast the word got out of my having cancer. I have always tried to be professional and not disclose personal information to my staff or clients about my personal life. Of course I had to clue in some of my staff about what is going on because I would be missing work due to treatment. My job entails networking with alot of community orgaizations. It would appear the entire city I live in now knows my health status. I can not go anywhere without being recognized because we live in a small community. I don't want to be recognized as "the woman with cancer." This disease takes away ones pride and dignity! I do not want people to "pity" me or "count me out" because I have cancer. I had someone at work say to me today .."How bad is "it." Well, I hope you make it!" Now this person meant well, but I went to work to forget about cancer for a while. I mean I do appreciate people's prayers and concerns, but need a break from cancer. I live with this disease 24/7, it is always there lurking around somewhere in the background. I must pray to God to help me not be so prideful. I have decided that once I get through treatment, I will use this attention to voice Lung Cancer Awareness in my area and an Anti-Smoking Campaign with the youth that I work with. I just pray that God sees me through this tough period coming up with treatment. I am ready to take it on already! Hate the wait! Cheryl

Shannon and Mike. Prayers are coming your way from Texas. -Cheryl and Jack-

Carleen, We will be looking for your post in the "Good News" section today. Our prayers are with you and Keith. -Jack-

Good information Rick... Thanks Go Sponsors! -Jack-

Oops! I really am "empty headed", I meant to post this in the Husbands dealing with wifes' cancer section" Cheryl

My oncologist called this morning to cancel the chemo appt. made by his substitute nurse. He was out of town when we called to get the MRI results on Mon., so was his regular nurse. The sub nurse was kind enough to give me my unofficial MRI results before the doctr saw them because she too had the very same experience of waiting for MRI brain results. She also tenatively scheduled me my first chemo appt. My oncologist called today to give me my official "empty headed results" and cancel the chemo appt. scheduled for today. He wants me to start with radiation first. No appts were available till next month!!! Jack called the doctor back madder than a hornet! He demanded we get in earlier. I was diagnosed over 5 weeks ago and am still waiting to get started. Is that normal? I am quite anxious to take on this beast before it can spread any further! Well, the doctor did call back and got me an appt for a consult next Wed.. I guess we won't officially begin till the following week? I worry about Jack's physical wellbeing. He has HBP and heart disease runs in his family. He stays stuck in "anger" as a means of coping. He has lost 15lbs. and not sleeping himself. He has few spports, other than this board. I have been so stubornly independent all of my life that it is difficult to accept help. Jack is not use to my emotional dependency on him and it has really stresses him out. My thanks to you guys for giving him the support he needs to make it through this ordeal. Cheryl

Welcome to the "empty cabasa club"... We are so happy for Mom! Keep the good news flowing! -Cheryl-

Great news Tiny, You know we will be praying for you... Have a ball at the lake! You deserve it! -Cheryl-

Working as closely with your dad as you do Deb, you are THE one that quickly notices changes... Great job of doing the ground work to get the early CT... You are right, you could at the very least, be deserving of a phone call from your onc. I had that exact conversation Monday about an MRI of Cheryl's. Starting early in the morning making calls to get results and hearing every excuse in the book from the nurse, I finally told them that this relationship was starting off on the wrong foot if this is how we are to be treated. I also told them (his nurse) that those were our results, not the docs or the nurses or anybody elses and that maybe we need to look elsewhere for treament. She was shocked and basically said that was my prerogative. Fifteen minutes later we got the call with the results and was set up for wednesdays first chemo. Sheesh! Is this what it takes! They make it so much mre difficult than it has to be for sure! Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your mother and of course, your dad. _Jack and Cheryl

Jessica, Your mother sounds like she has a strong will to survive and quite a fighter! Let her know that people from this board are praying all over the world for her and calling upon God's Angels to watch over her. Though it is hard to relax, tell her to do her part by concentrating on healing! Cheryl and Jack

Our hero Dave! Tough as nails!! TEE TIME! Keep 'em on the greens!!! Congrats!..(crowd noise) Jack n Cheryl