Hi: I also am surprised that Ken will be having a lobectomy if the cancer has spread outside his lungs.
At any rate, I had a lobectomy 15 months ago. The pain was managed well. Be sure to ask for an epidural. My biggest problem was being able to urinate after the catheter was removed. The epidural and other pain killers retard the urinary response, but it can be dealt with. In my case, I had to have the catheter reinserted, and I went home with it. I later saw an urologist who treated me for an urinary infection. The catheter came out about a week after discharge. For me, dealing with the catheter was way more traumatic than the operation itself. My recovery was relatively pain free. I had physical therapy that started about 6 weeks after surgery and went for 3 months. I believe it helped a lot.
The single most important therapy in recovery is to walk. I was walking a mile a day within 3 weeks after surgery. 4 months after surgery, I could walk a mile in 16 minutes. I also had to cough a lot immediately after surgery to clear the lungs. It hurt, but I needed to get the gunk out of my lungs so I would not get pneumonia.
Don M