Ann

A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn,screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup. As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects. He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. "I noticed the ' Choose Life' license plate holder, the ' What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the ' Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car."

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THIS KIND OF STUFF HAS GOT TO STOP IN OUR COUNTRY! We Must Stop This Immediately! Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper. Groceries are heavier. And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street has become! This extension work was apparently done at night!! Very sneaky stuff.. And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the youngsters. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader? I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day, and she has aged so much that she didn't even recognize me. I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own refection ........Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way they used to be! Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them.. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror. Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a size 32 pair of pants a 42, or medium shirt as 'extra large? Do they think no one notices that these things no longer fit around the waist, hips, thighs, and neck? The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I actually "believe" the number I see on that dial? I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're fooling? I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in there! All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities. PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO WE CAN GET THIS CONSPIRACY STOPPED!

"The Cab Ride" Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. It was a cowboy's life, a life for someone who wanted no boss. What I didn't realize was that it was also a ministry. Because I drove the night shift, my cab became a moving confessional. Passengers climbed in, sat behind me in total anonymity, and told me about their lives. I encountered people whose lives amazed me, ennobled me, made me laugh and weep. But none touched me more than a woman I picked up late one August night. I was responding to a call from a small brick four Plex in a quiet part of town. I assumed I was being sent to pick up some partiers, or someone who had just had a fight with a lover, or a worker heading to an early shift at some factory for the industrial part of town. When I arrived at 2:30 a.m., the building was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window. Under such circumstances, many drivers just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away. But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door and knocked. "Just a minute," answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware. "Would you carry my bag out to the car?" she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness. "It's nothing," I told her. "I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated." "Oh, you're such a good boy," she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address, then asked, "Can you drive through downtown?" "It's not the shortest way," I answered quickly. "Oh, I don't mind," she said. "I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice." I looked in the rearview mirror. Her eyes were glistening. "I don't have any family left," she continued. "The doctor says I don't have very long." I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. "What route would you like me to take?" I asked. For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing. As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, "I'm tired. Let's go now." We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair. "How much do I owe you?" she asked, reaching into her purse. "Nothing," I said. "You have to make a living," she answered. "There are other passengers," I responded. Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly. "You gave an old woman a little moment of joy," she said. "Thank you." I squeezed her hand, then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life. I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away? On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life. We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

Sorry things aren't going so well right now. I'm praying there is improvement in your MIL soon. Please, talk to her doctor. There are so many things that seem to cause confusion in cancer patients and end of lie issues is only one of them. Dehydration, reaction to meds....only a few. Hope you find some answers.

What is something special that you do for yourself when you're feeling really down???

Bag = evening, tote, shopping Next word = Dress

If, like the characters in The Wizard of Oz, you could choose A Heart Courage A Brain which would you take??? Why???

bicycle - ride - tire - playing cards popcorn

Oh Don...I'm really with you on this one. It seems like I go through this a couple of times a month. I always seem to land behind someone who is writing a check and then searching for ID. Oh..also love it when they have to fill the check out at the last minute. Would help so much if they had the name of the store, date and sign the check already filled out! But...I never use checks too much anymore. I can't live without my debit card.

Such very good news!!! I know your Dad will be smiling down on you and this precious new life. Who knows??? The two of them may have already met!

Keeping Darrell in my thoughts and prayers. Please tell him we are all thinking of him!!!

I hate it when moms allow their little ones to pick up the candy and gum off the racks. Then, when mom says they can't have it, the kids go off like a siren. I know it's hard to monitor the little ones while unloading a grocery cart. Believe me when I say I've been there and done that. But...I wish stores would get a clue and put all this stuff up high out of little hands reach!!!

Come on gang....let's play!!! I'm going to post a word and then someone posts three things you can do with the word I have posted. After posting the three things, start a new word. Better do an example: ie: Pencil Write ~ Poke ~ Dial Got it???? Next word is BALL

What things really bug you about waiting in the check out line at the supermarket???

GAMES FOR WHEN WE ARE OLDER > 1. Sag, you're it. > 2. Hide and go pee. > 3. 20 questions shouted into your good ear. > 4. Kick the bucket. > 5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over. > 6. Musical recliners. > 7. Simon says something incoherent. > 8. Pin the Toupee on the Bald Guy. > > SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE: > 1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale. > 2. You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them. > 3. You change your underwear after a sneeze. > > OLD IS WHEN: > 1. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face. > 2. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't >have to go along. > 3. Getting a little action means you don't need fiber today. > 4. Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot. > 5. An all-nighter means not getting up to pee! > > Thoughts for the week > > Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctr Alt Delete' and start all over? > > Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. > > If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor! > > Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever. > > But Most Of All, Remember - > A Good Friend Is Like A Good Bra: Hard to Find, > Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!

The old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from the couch then starts putting on his coat. His wife, seeing the unexpected behavior, asks, "Where are you going?" He replies, "I'm going to the doctor." She says, "Why, are you sick?" He says, "Nope, I'm going to get me some of that Viagra stuff." Immediately the wife starts working and positioning herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put on her coat. He says, "Where the hell are you going?" She answers, "I'm going to the doctor, too." He says, "Why, what do you need?" She says, "If you're going to start using that rusty old thing, I'm getting a tetanus shot."

Ed was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was Really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE." The next morning Ed got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough, there was a small box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, Brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Funeral services for Ed have been scheduled for Friday.

((((((((((((((((((Tina))))))))))))))))))))))

I always loved Freddy Fender's music. So sad when we lose a really great entertainer. So very sorry.

What was your very favorite Halloween character/costume that you ever dresses as???

Cindi...this sounds like a really good plan!!! I know you will make us all green with envy!!! Hey, don't worry about excess baggage...physical things or mental. Sometimes, just clearing your head and leaving it all behind can do wonders. You know that I'm in your corner, wishing you whatever brings happiness!!!

So very sorry for all you are dealing with!!! I'm keeping your sister in my prayers!

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Do you recycle????