LynneH

Ahhh...Cancer.....It is one of very few things in this life that I would happily watch die and not lift one finger to help it stay alive.... Lynne

Missy, I'm so glad you posted this. I didn't want to erase Jim's treatment history because it was sort of a journal of the cancer journey, the ups and downs. But, I didn't want to post either and then possibly affect someone's hope. As Heather posted, I do remember finding this site and eagerly reading everyone's treatment history to glean ideas to take to Jim's doctor. Like Ger, Jim didn't want to know much of the info or details. Thanks for posting this. Your post and the replies remind me that maybe I can be of help to someone even though I have stayed 'quiet' on the boards for a while now. I hope your days are getting a little easier. Thanks, Lynne

Ann, A Big Hug just for you....such a roller coaster ride.... Although the notes bring sad tears, what a wonderful memory of his love.....I love the words on your posts: "Each time we embrace a memory, we meet once again with those we love ~ for the heart never forgets." I guess you were meeting once again with Dennis.... Take care, Lynne

Oops, can tell I haven't been typing lately. Only supposed to 'water' it once a month, not 'order' it.....maybe I need a glass of wine..

I cannot keep a plant alive...mostly through neglect, but even when I try.....EXCEPT for this wonderful Zee (?) plant that a friend gave me. You are only supposed to order it once a month, doesn't care if it gets light....and it is THRIVING and producing babies!!! I feel wonderful to now have a live plant in the house for longer than 4 months....

I will miss you Frank......To Frank's family, I hold you in my thoughts tonight and thank you for allowing us to share in so much of Frank's time and humor..... Lynne

Determined

Don, I am so sorry that you are going through such difficult times. Know that you are in my thoughts... Lynne

Yardsticks (I'm having to replace flooring...)

"I am wealthy"

So well said Ginny.....and leave it to our lovely Pat to be worrying about someone else in the midst of her own pain..... I, too, am mostly a reader and not a poster these days. I still cry and cheer for all of you here. I will always engage in a conversation to promote awareness that no one 'deserved' to get lung cancer or to die from lung cancer, when the opportunity arises. You are wonderful people...... Love, Lynne

Cindy, Happy New Year to you! I don't sign on as often, but love to see you post. You were the first person that I was brave enough to pm on this site after I had been reading it for almost a year......Your successes, personality and tremendous outlook have always been inspiring........ Enjoy 2007! Lynne

Geri, Jim and I laughed our way through life. Sometimes inappropriately, sometimes irreverantly. His doctor was from Syria and approached us initially with a quite serious tone. After about 5 minutes of absorbing a sobering diagnosis, we quipped about something. The doctor looked a little stunned, but then began to share his good sense of humor as well through the remainder of our days as the 3 musketeers, fighting for what we could. After Jim developed a tumor in his brain, he too saw spiders at the end of the bed and on the walls. At first, I tried to lovingly reason with him that they were not real. He wasn't buying. So, I began to try and crush them and would ask him if I got them. He always shook his head 'no' and I could never tell for sure if there was a slight smile behind the shake of his head.......I'll never know, but I'll always remember his smile and his GREAT sense of humor..... Thanks for asking about this Geri and relating your laughing tales, Lynne

Kase , Coughing and pink hivey spots? You need some TLC! Since I can't be there, I'm trusting Fred and Teddy to curl up next to you and bring you hot chocolate and yummy bones.....Will be reading to check on your scan results....... thinking about you, as always, Lynne

Lovely topic Adela, thanks for including all of us in this.....I loved reading everyone's replies since I haven't been on much in a while. My Jim sounds a lot like Peggy's Don. I insisted on the REAL tree each year, Jim would roll his eyes, but off we would go..... I didn't put Christmas decorations out last year as it was the first without Jim. This year, I went and bought the tree myself. Chose the first one I picked up. Just wanted to get out of there and to the house with it. Next, I pulled the boxes out of the attic. Jim always packed everything up because I'm kind of lazy and wouldn't get to it for a while. So, I open the box with the stockings. Two for the dogs (although Sadie dog is gone now), one girlie one for me that I bought a few years ago, and one RATTY OLD stocking that I had needlepointed for Jim at least 20 years ago. In the needlepoint, I had 3 big letters for him.... J I M. I pulled his stocking out of the box, turned it over, and on top of each of the letters, he had glued 3 new letters cut out of pink paper...L Y N. He must have done that his last Christmas here when he knew how sick he was. I didn't know until a few nights ago. Now, that broke the water dam!!! I don't know if he was being his practical self and figuring I might as well continue to get good use out of it, or if he just wanted to say 'hello' whenever I got around to looking in that box. Jim was always doing things like that. He was wonderful. I miss him. Now the pink lettered LYN stocking hangs above the fireplace and keeps his memory alive when I pass by it each evening....... Thanks and happy holidays to all of you here....you have been my life savers many a night...... Lynne

I am so sorry you are going through this..... I also understand your question. It was the same question that I kept asking when Jim was dying. I recall a nurse at the hospital giving me a booklet about the dying process that described specific physical symptoms that happen at each stage (and approx. time frames) but not everything applied. I guess it is truly unique to each person. Jim went into the hospital for the last week of his life. He was undergoing brain radiation and I suspect it was the swelling that made him lose the ability to talk, walk, or open his eyes. I ambulanced him to the hospital and in essence, sat with him waiting for him to die. I kept asking when. His wonderful doctor told me probably about a week. Each time I asked, he would give me his best guess again, and he ended up being correct. Jim lived 1 week. The nurse guessed that Jim could live in that condition for multiple weeks or a month. From the time he entered the hospital, he wasn't able to eat and swallowing was difficult. Within a few days, he had a catheter and all meds were via an IV. I watched the urine output as that was supposed to be a sign that when there was no more, it was close. Jim was still producing urine when he died. I was so afraid that I wouldn't be in the room when he died, but all these posts that remind us that the exact moment isn't the important part are right. It was all of the love and moments of our life that led us to this part. Your Mom knows how much you have loved and cared for her, even if she wasn't able to express it. My thoughts are with you as you live through this most difficult part. Lynne

Father's: Addison Dupree Mother's: Haven't a clue.

All crossed!

Lynne! First name is Mary. Remember that all good little southern girls go by two names - "Mary Lynne". Dropped the Mary eventually.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

Oh Carleen, It's been too hard to come here much lately, but I checked in and saw your devastating news. Thank you for sharing Keith with us and for sharing your beautiful love story too. I have no words to ease your bone-deep pain. I am so sorry. May peace find you, Lynne

Ms Cindi-girl! 4000....Do you ever sleep? I haven't been on the board in a while and decided to check in on everyone today. Saw that our own celebrity girl had talked so much it was noted in the news! I've missed you......... Lynne

Has to be the bed and the new washing machine I just purchased! Yippee! Have to keep those sheets clean so I can nap my life away!

Tina, I am so sad to read about Charlie's passing. I cannot offer any words to ease your pain, but please know that you and your family are in my thoughts. I am so very sorry, Lynne

Kase, Tracy will be highest in my thoughts, right up beside you. Nothing less than benign will be acceptable. Sit tight and let us hold some of that worry for you. Love, Lynne