Mendy

I am so sorry that this day has come. I will miss reading Frank's posts. He had great dignity and humor til the end. My condolences on your loss Pattie, Connie, and the rest of your family. Mendy

So glad to read that you are recovering and your margins were clean. Very good news! Good luck with the chemo. What a long year for you. Mendy

Dear Grace, I am saying a prayer for Carlton. What a frightening time for you. Try and stay strong for your girls. May you receive reassuring news on your husband today. Mendy

Yeah Maryanne! You both must be so happy to be finished. Hopefully never again (fingers crossed)! Mendy

My husband's tumor showed up on a pre-op x-ray to have a hernia fixed (which he still has and wants to keep as a good luck charm). That was the end of June 2006. He had reaccuring bronchitis that spring and his pcp knew about his 30+year smoking history and did not suggest a chest x-ray. His last prior x-ray had been late in 2003. We feel that an annual chest x-ray would have shown his mass sooner and might have prevented lymph node involvement. By the time it was discovered, it was 10 cm. Good luck and thanks for being an activist. Mendy

I am so sorry John lost his fight. May you both find peace. Try to stay strong and know you will find support here. Mendy

Wendy, Welcome. What a year you and your husband have had. Glad you are here. You will find you are among a great group of people and will find the support and hope you need. May 2007 be a better year for you and your husband. Mendy

Has anyone heard from Kim and how her husband Mike is doing? It has been a long time since she posted. Mendy

Oh Flowergirlie, You need big hugs, a bottle of wine, and a very good cry tonight maybe followed by some chocolate. How dare that doctor put a timeframe on your husbands life! I suggest you take a look on Ernie's story and see if there are some modifications you can make to your husband's diet. Your husband has had too much for one person to shoulder. I hope you are able to help him raise his spirits and fight for his life. I think of you and your husband often when I come to this board. Hang in there. Mendy

Bill, You and my husband seem to be experiencing many similar thoughts and emotions. I appreciate that you took the time to share your thoughts. My husband often won't share what he is thinking but will react to me and say that I don't have cancer and can't know what it is like and he is right. I try my best but I am not a mind reader (although my son thinks I am ). He is having the hardest time with his hair loss and I sometimes forget that he doesn't look the same as he did before all this started because he is still the man I love and I find him just as attractive, maybe even more so. Before he started chemo, he had thick shoulder length hair that he wore in a ponytail. Right after his first infusion he cut if off and had a buzz cut which looked great. Now he is wearing a bandana most of the time and just isn't comfortable with the way he looks. We got into a heated discussion yesterday because I wanted him to go to a viewing to pay respects to my sister-in-law and brother who drove up to Maryland from Georgia to bury her grandfather. He adamantly refused because he didn't want people looking at him and asking questions about lung cancer. I didn't really understand and just had to drop it because he was getting very upset with me. My assumption was that losing hair for a man wouldn't be as traumatic as it would for a woman but it is. My conclusion is that cancer is very difficult for the person experiencing it and for the people who love them. Mendy

Bill, I feel for you because I have been exactly where you are right now. Your posts intrigued me so I found the article that sparked this discussion and I agree that the statistics are frightening. I had to see for myself what the odds where for stage 3A nsclc after my husbands surgery. I couldn't find anything that says other than 5-year survival rate of 30%. Imagine looking at my 3 and 5 year old kid's faces and thinking about the fact that their daddy most likely won't be here. After a breakdown which was long-overdue, I decided that my husband didn't fit the average profile and to listen to his doctors and to ignore the odds. You need to do the same. Oh, I went back and looked at previous postings and came to the same realization as you, too many are no longer here. What I like about the mix of caregivers and people who have cancer are the different perspectives. My husband refuses to participate in any forums or support groups. He wants to feel as "normal" as possible. But, he does occasionally ask me what others have experienced with the different treatments he is undertaking. He likes the fact that I filter the negative information if possible and share what we think he needs to know. Not my choice, but something I am willing to do for him to stay strong and motivated to fight. Bill, stay strong and give yourself every fighting chance you can. I recommend ignoring statistics and place yourself in the group of survivors of sclc. You are responding very well to treatment and will continue to do so (especially if you will quit smoking ) Mendy

A surgeon would tell you they don't know until they get the pathology results back. A fungal ball will show up as a dense mass in the lung and isn't cancer. Scarring from pneumonia or tb will look irregular on an xray. Please don't worry too much until you know for sure what is causing the dense mass. It could be something other than cancer. I hope you won't be needing our support. Good luck! Mendy

I am so sorry for your loss. At least she is in peace now. May you stay strong in your difficult days ahead. Mendy

I am so sorry for the pain you are going through. It is so difficult to watch your loved one go. I wish you and your family peace in your Mom's journey. Mendy

Thanks for that interesting site. My husband has been advised not to take any antioxidants or vitamins during radiation so that is helpful. I think he needs to eat blackstrap molasses and sunflower seeds. Mendy

Congratulations! Are you looking at a Sept. baby??? What fun for your family and your mom. If you need any help with morning sickness tips, let me know. Mendy

Yeah Kasey!!! What a wonderful way to start off this new year. I know what you mean about feeling a little guilty when receiving such great news when many friends here are struggling to defeat or contain their cancer. There seems to be little rhyme or reason to the mysteries of life. Go celebrate! Mendy

I too have been wondering why I haven't seen posts from Cindi-Oh. Hope you are just busy living life. Mendy

Maryanne, That is great news! Nothing like being surrounded by your loved ones during the holidays...especially little ones at Christmas. Tell your sister that she should look for a gently used Graco Pack-n-Play which is what we used for as a crib for our kids when we traveled and when they spent the night at their grandparents. It works great and is inexpensive when used and stores easily. Mendy

Like Snowflake, my husband will begin radiation the beginning of January targeted at the area where the tumor was removed and a positive lymph node was to make sure there are no stray cells left behind to grow. His team are going for a cure. I am all for the extra measure if it will help prevent any future cancer. Your sisters treatment plan sounds reasonable to me. I am really happy she is doing so well. Mendy

Karen, I am so sorry for what you are facing. Hopefully you will have some special moments with your dad and he will find some peace. Hang in there. Lots of hugs, Mendy

What a wonderful way to start off the holiday season! I hope the doctors can get to the bottom of what the disease is and treat it successfully. Mendy

Joe, I am so happy for you and your family. Thank goodness for excellant doctors, faith, and good health. Keep up the good work. Mendy

Oh Liz, I am so sorry you are having a rough go of it. Thank goodness you made the medical staff help you get under control. I hope your further treatment is much easier on you. Keep us updated. Mendy

Judy, I am sorry you weren't invited to spend Thanksgiving day with your son's family. I too would feel a bit sad about that. Most likely if they are working hard then things are a bit stressful and they haven't had time to make things as nice as they would like to have family over for dinner. They could just need a bit of time together to catch up and relax. My philosophy is to always clear the air by having a conversation to find out if things are ok and make plans to get together soon. If you are too tired to prepare a meal and you have the resouces, maybe you could offer to provide a prepared meal from a restaurant for everyone to enjoy that doesn't involve a lot of stress and time for everyone involved. Good luck and I hope you are able to get together with your son and his family. Mendy